After a months-long hiatus, "The Bachelor" franchise has returned, this time with all-American family man Ben "Unlovable" Higgins at its center. And on "Here To Make Friends," we talk about all of it -- for the right reasons.
In this week's "Here To Make Friends" podcast, hosts Claire Fallon and Emma Gray recap Episode 3 of "The Bachelor," Season 20. We'll discuss all of the racially charged microaggressions Jubilee had to deal with, the women's subpar soccer skills and the merits of "bad toes."
We'll also hear from "Dr. Love" himself -- aka the man responsible for last week's super awkward Love Lab date.
See who made the cut this week in the handy graphic above, and check out the full recap of Episode 3 by listening to the podcast below!
Do people love "The Bachelor," "The Bachelorette" and "Bachelor in Paradise," or do they love to hate these shows? It's unclear. But here at "Here To Make Friends," we both love and love to hate them -- and we love to snarkily dissect each episode in vivid detail. Podcast edited by Nick Offenberg.
The best tweets about this week's episode of "The Bachelor"...
olivia spent $40k on clothes? guys, you're handling this all wrong. you want her to lend you some of that. #TheBachelor
— Claire Fallon (@ClaireEFallon) January 19, 2016
These two blondes just had a conversation made up only of "like" and "I can't." #TheBachelor
— Jill Biden (@JillBidenVeep) January 19, 2016
This private plane is perfect for me, because I could just lean over the side to puke! #TheBachelor
— Emily L. Foley (@EmilyLFoley) January 19, 2016
When "First name, last initial" is appropriate to go by: Kindergarten, #TheBachelor. That's it.
— Steve Contorno (@scontorno) January 19, 2016
Isn't Lauren a flight attendant? Shouldn't she be the calmest person? #TheBachelor
— Sean Lowe (@SeanLowe09) January 19, 2016
I just ate two NyQuil so please don't hold any of my comments against me tonight. #TheBachelor
— Jenny Mollen (@jennyandteets) January 19, 2016
Why would you bring a flight attendant on an airplane date? Do your research, @BachelorInterns. #thebachelor
— Sandra Di (@Sandra_Di_) January 19, 2016
Based on the pecking motions Ben uses to kiss, he acted too soon in sending the chicken enthusiast home. #thebachelor
— Sandra Di (@Sandra_Di_) January 19, 2016
Ben and Lauren B. fly, smooch in Snoopy-style headgear. They fly over the Mansion. Lace's neurosis: visible from 10,000 feet. #thebachelor
— Jennifer Weiner (@jenniferweiner) January 19, 2016
When your hair is f***ing ruined but you gotta act like you're enjoying the date #TheBachelor pic.twitter.com/iU9UVBkFrr
— Jordyn Taylor (@jordynhtaylor) January 19, 2016
You might not care how the hot tub arrived, Lauren B, but I do. #TheBachelor
— Leigh Blickley (@leighblickley) January 19, 2016
Nice brand placement for #Jacuzzi. Did they sponsor the season? #TheBachelor
— Jen Marcus (@jenmarcus) January 19, 2016
How is Lauren B making this date "so amazing?" Just by being pretty? She hasn't said a word. #thebachelor
— Sandra Di (@Sandra_Di_) January 19, 2016
Nothing like an airplane date where you say "wow" 48392927 times and don't talk to each other #the bachelor
— Jaclyn Swartz (@JaclynSwartz) January 19, 2016
Looks like the hot tubs hijacked the travel budget #TheBachelor
— Andi Dorfman (@AndiDorfman) January 19, 2016
I HATE when girls tell guys that they're good looking! #TheBachelor
— Jenny Mollen (@jennyandteets) January 19, 2016
So this is like the sisterhood of the traveling hot tub. #TheBachelor
— Dana Weiss (@Possessionista) January 19, 2016
Lauren B is so terrified because she can really see herself falling for Ben but she should be more afraid of Ben's bad haircut #Bachelor
— Jen Gerson Uffalussy (@jennyalyse) January 19, 2016
*Deleted Scene* Lauren B had to serve Ben drinks mid flight #TheBachelor #BachelorMonday all ice no cans
— Will Lucus (@Bo_Billion86) January 19, 2016
"It's hard to have an open heart when you feel like you can see it being broken." #TheBachelor pic.twitter.com/nbuCHOpPed
— Andrea Lavinthal (@andilavs) January 19, 2016
There's no doubt in my mind Lace gets a red card. #TheBachelor
— Jill Biden (@JillBidenVeep) January 19, 2016
"People find me intimidating" is code for "people think I'm a massive bitch and I don't actually care" #TheBachelor
— Ella Dawson (@brosandprose) January 19, 2016
So... what I'm getting from this is that Lauren B wants to marry her dad. #TheBachelor
— Emma Gray (@emmaladyrose) January 19, 2016
Ben's "hope" bracelet? I feel like it's not an Obama thing. Higgins is totes a Jeb! voter bc of the unlovable thing #Bachelor
— Jen Gerson Uffalussy (@jennyalyse) January 19, 2016
True confession: It always sounds a little dirty to me when @benhiggi says "Will you accept *my* rose" 🌹🌹🌹
— Kristen Baldwin (@KristenGBaldwin) January 19, 2016
"I just really like yards" - the girl with extensions and fancy dress #TheBachelor
— Jaclyn Swartz (@JaclynSwartz) January 19, 2016
Ben doesn't want to jump too quickly into things which is why he is speed-dating on national television. #Bachelor
— Jen Gerson Uffalussy (@jennyalyse) January 19, 2016
She's talking about kids and Ben is eating it up! Remember when I did that on paradise and my guy RAN..???..haha me too. #TheBachelor
— Carly Waddell (@carlywaddell) January 19, 2016
Jamie is the new Olivia? #TheBachelor pic.twitter.com/xsjj96jkuT
— Robyn Ross (@RobynRossTV) January 19, 2016
When will they finally let a contestant be #Funemployed? #TheBachelor
— Bachelor Dudes (@BachelorDudes) January 19, 2016
"Lauren went from being the girl that I had a lot of fun with today to being the girl I got to dig deeper with." AKA, you went on a date.
— Jennifer Mendelsohn (@CleverTitleTK) January 19, 2016
Ben: "I think the lyrics are about a girl changing me." Band: "If i said that i still loved you, i'd be lying." #thebachelor
— Sandra Di (@Sandra_Di_) January 19, 2016
I can't watch Jubilee - a war veteran - be demeaned by this show. I just can't. #Bachelor
— Jen Gerson Uffalussy (@jennyalyse) January 19, 2016
Does any girl on this show ever like anything except country music? How about Metallica? #TheBachelor
— Kathleen Schmidt (@Bookgirl96) January 19, 2016
ben is a hot, generic, plain, docile, un-opinionated and uninteresting human. but because he's a man, we love him #TheBachelor
— Maxwell Strachan (@maxwellstrachan) January 19, 2016
Wait, there really are twins?
— Taffy Akner (@taffyakner) January 19, 2016
Team stars vs. team stripes. You know Ben was wishing it was Team Skimpy Shirts vs. Team Sports Bras. #thebachelor
— Jennifer Weiner (@jenniferweiner) January 19, 2016
Jubilee wishes she could be the kind of girl who could easily get Ben's attention and if you need me I'll be crying loudly in the corner
— Jen Gerson Uffalussy (@jennyalyse) January 19, 2016
sports have always been a big part of ben's life. especially women's soccer. #thebachelor
— Claire Fallon (@ClaireEFallon) January 19, 2016
In a dramatic change of events, Ben dumps all of the girls and runs off into the sunset with @alexmorgan13 #TheBachelor
— Jen Marcus (@jenmarcus) January 19, 2016
This date card should read, "welcome to the friend zone, suckers." #TheBachelor
— Dana Weiss (@Possessionista) January 19, 2016
All of these women went to elementary school and yet none of them have been touched by Title IX #TheBachelor
— Kate Dries (@TheSSKate) January 19, 2016
“I’m just going to take advantage of it,” says Olivia. "Game on." #TheBachelor pic.twitter.com/74EnkDK5FW
— Andrea Lavinthal (@andilavs) January 19, 2016
"Balls coming at your face is never fun." Why did I stop watching this show?
— Taffy Akner (@taffyakner) January 19, 2016
must be a nice ego boost to have ~10 women destroy themselves in front of you for the chance to go on a 10-on-1 date #TheBachelor
— Maxwell Strachan (@maxwellstrachan) January 19, 2016
Emily took all those balls to the face and Ben's not even gonna feed her dinner #unfair #TheBachelor
— Andi Dorfman (@AndiDorfman) January 19, 2016
The only way we can atone for #TheBachelor is to elect a female President ASAP.
— Patti Murin (@PattiMurin) January 19, 2016
Spoiler alert: if the only thing about me you can think to rip on is my fat toe, totally ok with it #TheBachelor
— Robyn Ross (@RobynRossTV) January 19, 2016
Toe-shaming: America's newest epidemic #TheBachelor pic.twitter.com/0Ac9CD1WWM
— Henry Goldblatt (@HenryGoldblatt) January 19, 2016
Olivia guessing which part of her body the other girls hate was the best piece of television I've seen all year. #TheBachelor
— Jenny Mollen (@jennyandteets) January 19, 2016
i don't think i've ever seen a girl on #TheBachelor apologize for being happy to get a 1-on-1 before, poor jubilee.
— Claire Fallon (@ClaireEFallon) January 19, 2016
"If it takes two times on the #bachelor to find someone that loves me, I guess I'll take my chances." -Amber, who's never heard of Tinder.
— Jennifer Mendelsohn (@CleverTitleTK) January 19, 2016
Shoutout to @MarcSnetiker for this spot-on Lace brilliance in @EW's bullseye #TheBachelor pic.twitter.com/kqu8AV0TDU
— Jessica Goodman (@jessgood) January 19, 2016
Olivia's redeeming moment comes in the form of accepting her ugly toes. #TheBachelor
— Lindsay Holmes (@lindsaygholmes) January 19, 2016
"Am I aggressive? Yes. Do I have bad toes? Yes." -- my new bumble bio #TheBachelor
— Jamie Feldman (@RealGirlProject) January 19, 2016
People are asking what my toes look like so I thought I'd just take a quick pic for y'all #fattoes #perfectionislame pic.twitter.com/MyIvg7exfx
— Olivia Caridi (@OliviaCaridi) January 19, 2016
A tip: don't throw all sides at him at once, Jubilee. That's Lace's game. #TheBachelor
— Catherine Lowe (@clmgiudici) January 19, 2016
"I like hot dogs" is my go-to first date conversation too. #TheBachelor
— Lindsay Holmes (@lindsaygholmes) January 19, 2016
This is a dream date with dream dishes and Jubilee wants hot dogs?! YASS. #TheBachelor
— Leigh Blickley (@leighblickley) January 19, 2016
"What's this?" - Ben eating a plum #TheBachelor
— Jenny Mollen (@jennyandteets) January 19, 2016
Need a gif of Jubilee's caviar eating face. #TheBachelor
— One Chicklette (@1chicklette) January 19, 2016
Jubilee, it doesn't matter what you heard if there's not a snapchat pic to prove it #TheBachelor
— Andi Dorfman (@AndiDorfman) January 19, 2016
I am crawling out of my skin listening to Jubilee trying to convince Ben that he never laughs unless SHE'S being funny. #thebachelor
— Sandra Di (@Sandra_Di_) January 19, 2016
I love how extravagant dates always make these girls realize they'd love to do everyday things with #TheBachelor
— Emily L. Foley (@EmilyLFoley) January 19, 2016
"Jubilee is someone who intrigues me," says #TheBachelor bc the producers were like, Hey keep pretending to like the woman of color, ok?
— Jen Gerson Uffalussy (@jennyalyse) January 19, 2016
The most fucked up thing about women is how they can take literally nothing and turn it into a great reason to continue dating someone.
— Jenny Mollen (@jennyandteets) January 19, 2016
"What food do you like?" "Hot dogs. I'm obsessed with hot dogs." "I like hot dogs." #ConversationsAreHard #theBachelor
— Elizabeth Hyndman (@edhyndman) January 19, 2016
When shit gets serious make an awkward joke and chug wine #TheBachelor
— Jaclyn Swartz (@JaclynSwartz) January 19, 2016
Jubilee says she's "never had this much fun on a date." Were her other dates concentration camp tours? #TheBachelor
— kyla crowther (@whatkylasaid) January 19, 2016
Jubilee tells Ben that she is the only surviving member of her family & now has guilt and he literally says, "What kind of guilt?" #Bachelor
— Jen Gerson Uffalussy (@jennyalyse) January 19, 2016
SURVIVOR'S GUILT, dammit Ben, pay attention. #thebachelor
— Sandra Di (@Sandra_Di_) January 19, 2016
Mediocre White Man Assures War Veteran She Has Value #TheBachelor
— Emma Gray (@emmaladyrose) January 19, 2016
This is my first time watching #TheBachelor this season but I really hope Jubilee's intro went something like this pic.twitter.com/FrYPd9UdCW
— EJ Samson (@ejsamson) January 19, 2016
There's a woman on the Bachelor named Jubilee. Must've been hard for her as a kid being named after the shittiest female member of the X-Men
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) January 19, 2016
The Taylor Swift twins talk a lot of trash. #TheBachelor
— Jill Biden (@JillBidenVeep) January 19, 2016
"Hi hater" That's how I'd greet Amber if I were Jubilee #TheBachelor
— One Chicklette (@1chicklette) January 19, 2016
Am I the only one reading between the lines as to why these women don't "see" Ben with someone like Jubilee? #TheBachelor
— Olivia NOPE (@ErPhrase) January 19, 2016
Damn, the Universe really has it out for #TheBachelor this season.
— Kristen Baldwin (@KristenGBaldwin) January 19, 2016
A wife that is friends with all the other soccer mom's is a wife I want nothing to do with. #TheBachelor
— Jenny Mollen (@jennyandteets) January 19, 2016
That one, with the Wisconsin accent. Can we smother her? #Bachelor
— Jennifer Mendelsohn (@CleverTitleTK) January 19, 2016
Ben: two people in my life died yesterday. Olivia: life is so hard, right? I have cankles and it SUCCCKKKSSSS. #thebachelor
— Jessica Goodman (@jessgood) January 19, 2016
Poetic fact: The Bachelor house is a rental.
— Taffy Akner (@taffyakner) January 19, 2016
time to send all the girls packing and bring in a new group. except for jubilee, keep her @benhiggi
— William Holman (@WilliamFHolman) January 19, 2016
"jubilee has this really aggressive side" as she nurtures a man who's going through a tough time. #TheBachelor
— Claire Fallon (@ClaireEFallon) January 19, 2016
Ben is like the Tom Joad of #TheBachelor: "Wherever there's a girl crying in a bathroom, I'll be there."
— Kristen Baldwin (@KristenGBaldwin) January 19, 2016
This thing about Jubilee flaunting her rose is just like a fight I had with a girl bragging about a homework pass in 2nd grade. #TheBachelor
— Sandra Di (@Sandra_Di_) January 19, 2016
Dear Amber: criticizing a weeping girl in front of the bachelor is going to get you absolutely nowhere. Don't be that girl. #thebachelor
— Jennifer Weiner (@jenniferweiner) January 19, 2016
When Jubilee said "Does anyone else want this date?" IT WAS A JOKE, GET A LIFE YOU LOSERS. #TheBachelor
— Ashley Hesseltine (@AshHess) January 19, 2016
Jubilee survived a WAR. That's all. 💪💪 #TheBachelor
— Jessica Goodman (@jessgood) January 19, 2016
Nobody jumped all over Olivia last week when she did the same thing. They just talked shit behind her back like normal people. #TheBachelor
— Jeannie Cahill (@jeanmachine13) January 19, 2016
"Like my tattoo says..." [brain explodes] #TheBachelor
— Kate Dries (@TheSSKate) January 19, 2016
Most great quotes were first tattoos. #TheBachelor
— Sean Lowe (@SeanLowe09) January 19, 2016
Lace exits with an I/me error. And all is right with the world. #Bachelor
— Jennifer Mendelsohn (@CleverTitleTK) January 19, 2016
Whoever is responsible for casting Olivia deserves a promotion #TheBachelor
— Andi Dorfman (@AndiDorfman) January 19, 2016