The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant ― but succinct ― wisdom. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious 140-character musings. For this week’s great tweets from women, scroll through the list below. Then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women page for our past collections.
sorry, I can't hang out tonight. I'm watching "My 600lb Life" and scrolling through engagement announcements on Facebook
— Jenna Amatulli (@ohheyjenna) December 27, 2016
if a robot became sentient this past year, they'd probably be like "ehhhh not for me"
— Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) December 29, 2016
The year is 2024. We now choose our President by whoever gets the most retweets. JK. It's only the electoral retweets that count.
— the war on bethmas (@bourgeoisalien) December 27, 2016
Can we leave "sorry for your losT" in 2016, please?
— wise young fattie🦋 (@SimoneMariposa) December 30, 2016
It's LOSS, people.
Not losT, like lost and found.
Christmas is over, you can block your relatives on social media now.
— Monica Ann (@Monicann86) December 27, 2016
"art is better when u struggle & suffer for it!!"
— Wendy witch ⭐️ (@AngrygirLcomics) December 29, 2016
me: pic.twitter.com/OJP6DFHQSl
if you're saying out loud that 2016 was actually a good year for you, you might be a sociopath
— Noël Wells (@RealTomHankz) December 28, 2016
Every Christmas I make my kids gather near the fire & watch Rihanna's family unwrap Chanel backpacks on Snapchat
— Gabby Noone (@twelveoclocke) December 24, 2016
The older I get, the more the solution "burn it to the ground" seems more reasonable.
— Michelle (@RageMichelle) December 29, 2016
me on instagram vs me on twitter pic.twitter.com/1E5crwP7n1
— Michelle Lee (@heymichellelee) December 22, 2016
at this point i'm pretty sure Facebook is making sure I see all my friends getting engaged
— Amber 🌸 Discko (@amberdiscko) December 29, 2016
2017 for feminists is gonna be like that training montage in "Enough" where JLo gets ready to slay the patriarchy.
— Emily McCombs (@msemilymccombs) December 29, 2016
a day where i watch no episodes of the good wife is a day wasted
— Jenna Weiss-Berman (@WBJenna) December 28, 2016
Men Are More Visual, and Other Fake Excuses They Tell You To Get Away With Shit
— BORK BORK (@priya_ebooks) December 30, 2016
Men when a woman takes off her makeup and they find out she doesn't actually have glittery pink eyelids and bright red lips pic.twitter.com/X1ZY0HpuEB
— pb (@paigebrittany) December 27, 2016
My dog ignores me when I whistle, so I've had to learn to imitate the sound of a fridge door opening.
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) December 30, 2016
date someone who makes you feel like first time you scratch your scalp after taking out a weave
— Hannah Giorgis (@ethiopienne) December 29, 2016
twitter, or as i like to call it, the attention-getting machine
— new year cait (@harmonicait) December 29, 2016
I'm not crying at the gym, I'm just sweating out of my eyeballs and nowhere else
— Emmy Blotnick (@emmyblotnick) December 30, 2016
Sex and the City 2017:
— Anna Swartz (@Anna_Snackz) December 23, 2016
Samantha: Putin? More like Put-it-in, honey ooo.
Charlotte: Samantha you're so ba—
everyone dies in a nuclear blast
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