Man Smuggles 22 Hunks Of Gold Out Of Canadian Mint Using His Anus

He's going to jail: No ifs, ands or butts, er, buts.

Prison is rearing its ugly head for a man who smuggled 22 gold pucks out of the Canadian Mint in his anus.

Not all at the same time, mind you.

Leston Lawrence was sentenced to 30 months in prison on Thursday for theft, breach of trust and money laundering.

He will serve an additional 30 months if he doesn’t pay $145,000 in restitution within three years.

The sentencing judge, aptly named Peter Doody, told the court prison time was needed to deter others from attempting similar crimes, according to the Canadian Press.

The 35-year-old Lawrence worked at the Canadian Mint in Ottawa for seven years as an operator in the Mint’s refinery section, before being fired in March, 2015.

The case came to light after an alert bank teller became suspicious that a Mint employee was cashing a lot of large checks from Ottawa Gold Buyers and wiring a lot of money out of the country, according to the Ottawa Citizen.

Lawrence also set off a metal detector inside the Mint building 28 times in a span of 41 days, although gold was never found on ― or in ― his body.

Royal Canadian Mint

Investigators started suspecting Lawrence was sticking the shiny gold where the sun don’t shine after finding latex gloves and vaseline in his locker, according to the New York Post.

Paying back $145,000 will be tough while in prison, but Lawrence will be coming into $15,000 from the sale of his home, and told the court he is trying to get money back that spent towards buying a boat in Florida and a house in Jamaica, according to the Canadian Press.

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