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Alexandra Gross

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My Childhood Pen-Pal Was an Innocent Man on Death Row

Posted: 10/31/2012 11:38 am

Last spring, my friend Paris Carriger was diagnosed with liver disease and told he had just a few months to live. His voice from the hospital was weak but calm. "This isn't the first time I've been sentenced to die," he said with a raspy chuckle, "though I don't expect I'll beat this one."

Thirty-five years ago Paris was sentenced to death for robbing an Arizona jewelry store and killing the owner. Paris said he had been framed by the real killer, a shady acquaintance named Robert Dunbar; he was arrested after police received a tip from a man who identified himself only as "Bob." Years later, Dunbar admitted to the crime, but despite this confession Paris was denied a new trial, and remained on death row.

Paris grew up with a poor, abusive mother who sent him to reform school at 10. He led a chaotic life. But faced with execution for another man's crime, he focused his energy. He wrote letters, dozens and dozens of letters to reporters, lawyers, activists and academics -- anyone who might be interested in his case.

Eventually he began to correspond with my mother, a professor of psychology and law with a humanitarian heart and an old-school appreciation of good letter writing. Paris was a smart, engaging correspondent. My mother came to believe in his innocence, and to care about him. When I was 4, with my parents' blessing, Paris first wrote to me.

I don't remember the first letter I got from Paris. I don't remember him coming into my life at all. He was just always there; a far-away pen pal, a friendly grownup presence who I knew only through letters and one greenish Polaroid of him standing with arms crossed in front of a metal grate.

Paris wasn't used to people letting him befriend their children, and he was deeply grateful to be allowed into my life. He was curious about my interests and the books I was reading, and he told me about the things he loved to do as a child -- fishing, riding horses, training dogs. He sent me gifts on my birthday -- binoculars, a pair of moccasins and, when I was 10, a typewriter that I began using to write to him.

In my child's mind, jail was a spare, cartoonish space where people ate from compartment trays and wore stripes. I had no real sense of what his existence must have been like. I completely accepted that he was innocent, and understood, to some degree, that he was the victim of a great injustice. But really, I didn't think about it that much. I sent him drawings and made him cards for Valentine's Day and Christmas. I asked him how the food was (not good). I told him all about our new puppy and my part in the school play.

Sometimes, Paris' insight into my experiences was better than my parents'. Once in middle school, I was bullied daily by a girl who said I had hugged her boyfriend -- myself the victim of a false accusation. This girl followed me around the halls with a crew of friends, muttering insults and trying to trip me. When she pushed me up against the lockers, I called her the "b-word" and our parents were called in for a meeting with the principal.

My mother couldn't understand why I hadn't told her about this, but Paris completely got it. He wrote to her, "Sasha's trouble looks different to me than it does to you. The biggest defeat would be to tell. Then she is branded a snitch and kids see her as the weaker one, the easy target."

In eighth grade, given an English assignment to write about a person I admired, I chose Paris.

The reality of death row came into sharp focus when I was 14. Despite Dunbar's confession, despite other witnesses who admitted they had lied, he had lost all his appeals. He had been in prison for 18 years. An execution date was set: Dec. 6, 1995.

My teenage mind focused on the horrors of execution itself. You exist today. You exist tomorrow. But at 12:15 a.m. on Dec. 6, you will no longer exist. What would it feel like to be informed precisely when you would be killed? It chilled my bones and made me sick.

He called more often. His voice, as usual, was calm and soft with a gentle southern drawl. I had no idea what to say to him. On my mother's advice, I told him that. "Keep your chin up," he said. "We may get out of this yet." My mother travelled to the prison in Florence, Ariz., for his clemency hearing. Paris was there in a metal cage, his belongings already divided up among the guards, his body afflicted with shingles, his spirit with humiliation and the fear of death.

He wasn't executed. On, Dec. 4, the Supreme Court upheld a stay of the execution to allow another appeal.

Three year later, with no advance warning, Paris was given $20 and a paper suit and let out the jail door. He set to work building a life from scratch, moving to Oklahoma to live with a long-lost half-sister. He came to visit us in Michigan. Incredible as it was to see him in person, he also seemed perfectly familiar; after all, I had known him forever.

My lifelong friendship with an innocent man on death row means that I have always been deeply opposed to the death penalty. I talk to people about it a lot these days with Proposition 34 and I urge them to vote "yes." Those who favor it often say it's too slow and expensive. I always think: "If we had a quick cheap death penalty, Paris would have been killed."

Unfortunately, Paris didn't live long enough to find out whether we will replace the death penalty in California. He died on May 21, at home with Sherrie, the woman he fell in love with and married several years after his release. The hospice workers said they had never seen anyone accept the end of life with such calm grace. Given how close he came to being executed for a crime he didn't commit, I can imagine that dying at home was, in a sense, a victory.

Loading Slideshow...
  • From a roadtrip that I took with a friend to visit Paris and his wife, Sherrie, in Oklahoma in 2005.

  • From a roadtrip that I took with a friend to visit Paris and his wife, Sherrie, in Oklahoma in 2005.

  • From a roadtrip that I took with a friend to visit Paris and his wife, Sherrie, in Oklahoma in 2005.

  • From a roadtrip that I took with a friend to visit Paris and his wife, Sherrie, in Oklahoma in 2005.

  • From a roadtrip that I took with a friend to visit Paris and his wife, Sherrie, in Oklahoma in 2005.

 
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Last spring, my friend Paris Carriger was diagnosed with liver disease and told he had just a few months to live. His voice from the hospital was weak but calm. "This isn't the first time I've been ...
Last spring, my friend Paris Carriger was diagnosed with liver disease and told he had just a few months to live. His voice from the hospital was weak but calm. "This isn't the first time I've been ...
 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
wmc519
Blind faith and blind squirrels both find nuts.
09:41 PM on 11/13/2012
Forgive me if I go off on a rant here.
Prosecutors get promoted for winning cases. If they lose they do not move up the ladder. That has nothing to do in regards to the facts of the case. If someone is innocent has no bearing on their career prospects. Convicting them does. Ever since the Supreme Court decided that "actual innocence" did not matter, prosecutors were given more power than they should. It is called "Prosecutorial Discretion." This decision will put many actually innocent people to death. No one will ever know the true numbers because innocence does not matter.
This allows prosecutors to decide who they want to try and who they do not. In many states they seek the death penalty on a whim. It is used as a bargaining chip. We will kill you unless you plead guilty. Save me the work and you can live.
The only way to stop this kind of abuse is to limit the power that prosecutors have. They should be held accountable. In their zeal to become number one they should never be allowed to knowingly hide evidence, allow false testimony or mislead any jury. They should be better than that. If any is found to have sent a person to their death knowing that they have sent that person there under false means then they should be on death row themselves. If this happens to just one there may be a real change in the justice system.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
kadellagroove
Left leaning, Jeffersonian Whig.
12:59 AM on 11/11/2012
The death penalty is wrong on many levels. In theory there are certain criminals I'd kill myself.... But given all the problems with proving guilt and prosecution etc... I just feel it's wrong to put that power in the governments hands.
01:32 PM on 11/05/2012
....an after thought.
I have read several of the comments. It is indicative of the population we have. Being a christian, and a believer.... we are to take care of widows and orphans and care for the prisoners. Now in Biblical times things were a bit different, but compassion is never out of style. The stigma of having been incarcerated for a crime you did NOT commit, and finally there is DNA proof.... what does that say about our law enforcement? We grab who is loose and looks guilty and it takes a case off the books. Doesn't particularly matter if it is the right "criminal". What if you happened to be the guy the local cop didn't like and wanted to get you out of his hair.... let's get real folks. That does happen, and we are releasing folks even in Texas because they are innocent! ...worst part is we spent all that money and time on sloppy work, and the real perpetrator is still out there somewhere.
01:17 PM on 11/05/2012
I am glad that Sasha got to write about her experience.
Paris always considered her as a family member, the neice he never had. He was truly blessed to have had a life line of people who cared enought to write and keep in touch. These were folks he considered "family" because God gave them to him. They made a difference in his life and he cherished each and every one. All the years we were married he kept in touch and I came to know each one and befriended them as well. It is a part of him I cling to now as he has "gone home" and I am left behind with the memories. I thank each one for their friendship. Sherrie
11:13 AM on 11/05/2012
I, too am pen-pals with a wrongfully convicted prisoner and believe 100% in his innocence; in fact I am flying from NJ to MO in December to meet him for the first time. I understand that this is taboo for many, but appreciate it when others understand the friendship that can be formed - so thank you for writing this article. I have the utmost respect for you and your parents for believing so strongly in your convictions.

I have just began writing a blog about my friend with Byron Case (the inmate) in hopes that it will allow people to better understand and be less judgmental.
08:35 PM on 11/04/2012
Here's another story about prison pen pals. This link is to an article about one of my sister's best friends in high school. According to my sister, the man described in the article as her former boyfriend was actualy a conviced muderer she met through a pen pal program with her church; I imagine that the convict described himself as Cindy's boyfriend, and I imagine he was the only one at the scene still able to speak after the crimes he committed there. Cindy's church encouraged young adults to write to prisoners in an attempt to turn around the lives of criminals and bring them to God. Cindy corresponded with one such prisoner while he was incarcerated. After his release, he tracked down Cindy, broke into her home and attacked her husband with a claw hammer he brought to the scene. Cindy's husband Bob shot his murderer at least twice before dying himself, but the convict was still able to kill Bob and maim Cindy horribly. Cindy was never the same after suffering horrific brain injury. This article is about the subsequent abuse/neglect of Cindy's daughter, which I believe was a direct result of the injuries suffered by her mother when a released convict with whom she'd corresponded brutally attacked her, altering her ability to reason and function. The above article is one person's experience with having a convicted murderer for a pen pal; Cindy's was quite different.
http://articles.latimes.com/1999/oct/02/local/me-17825
05:18 PM on 11/04/2012
I am still really troubled by the fact that parents would let their child correspond with an adult man even if they did believe that he was innocent.
07:52 PM on 11/04/2012
Yes. An adult man convicted of felony muder. It had never occurred to me before to wonder how many convicted muderers on death row have pen pals who are children, but it has now. O.O
03:09 AM on 11/05/2012
Glad to see that there are people who understand felony murder! I get tired of trying to explain that to people. :)
08:04 PM on 11/04/2012
well, she did say that she was "pretty sure" he was innocent. insane.
04:19 PM on 11/04/2012
For the most part, I am aainst the death penalty. BUT, when we KNOW for SURE the awful crime and the guilty person, than it depends on the crime. That being said, the death penalty punishes the family of the criminal more than the convicted. Imagine, if you will, the heart of a mother knowing her son or daughter will be executed at 11:05 pm on a Tuesday evening. HOW does one deal with THAT? What of the children, and other loved ones? So, except for the MOST terrible crimes, I vote for life in prison where a prisoner is safe, free from harm, but REQUIRED to work everyday for all that he or she needs and wants. Food, sheets, soap, all of the things the taxpayer mucst work or. This sure would be a way to re educate those who will someday be free, and also to keep these people busy!
01:40 PM on 11/04/2012
This has "lifetime movie" written all over it. But it won't hit the screen until it all goes sour.
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KeithTexas
Government is not smart enough for Conspiracie
01:17 PM on 11/04/2012
They kill them in Texas with no consideration of guilt or innocence. Perry killed one a few months ago that was convicted with imaginary evidence and the "Good Governor" knew it. Killed him anyway because he wanted to run for President and thinks a Republican that exercises the death penalty has a better chance of being elected.

Funny how the Conservative Christians are the biggest supporters of the death penalty. Weird religion, deadly people
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
pslcitizen
I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
01:16 PM on 11/04/2012
Okay, the guy is 'innocent' but who is letting a child be a pen pal with anyone in jail?
05:20 PM on 11/04/2012
Thank you, I had the exact same question. This story could also have taken a more troubling turn.
The Super Patriot
Navy vet for a strong 3rd party
02:34 AM on 11/05/2012
Everything happens for a reason. In this case the guy had support and was proven innocent and got back a piece of his life. However, in no way would I suggest kids having prison pen pals, for a host of reasons. This is probably a "once in-a-blue moon" situation. Fortunately it turned out for the better.
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09:25 AM on 11/04/2012
Petitioning Governor of the State of Ohio 2 This petition will be delivered to:
Governor of the State of OhioGovernor of the State of Ohio: Commute the Death Sentence of Brett Hartmann
Petition by

Diane Morretti

Mesa, AZ
Thank you for signing the petition "Governor of the State of Ohio: Commute the Death Sentence of Brett Hartmann" Multiply your impactTurn your signature into dozens more by sharing this petition and recruiting people you know to sign.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We the undersigned, urge the Governor of the State of Ohio, to commute the death sentence of Brett Hartmann.

Brett was sentenced to death on May 22, 1998 for the murder of Winda Snipes.
Many questions remain unanswered concerning the facts around this case, including phone records that place Brett at home at the time of the crime, untested evidence, and contradictory results where tests have been done.
Brett received poor representation at trial and had little investigation done on his behalf.
Trial lawyers (including his own), judges, and prosecutors involved in the case have all been accused and/ or convicted of wrongdoing in a variety of circumstances since Bretts conviction.

We deeply sympathize with the family and friends of Winda Snipes, but we respectfully offer that another death will neither heal nor resolve this tragedy.

Action petitioned for; We the undersigned, urge the governor of the state of Ohio to act now and commute the death sentence given to Brett Hartmann.
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10:28 AM on 11/04/2012
Please go to change.org to read more on Brett Hartmann and to sign the petition. Brett's execution date is set for November 13, 2012. Time is running out. One of the detectives that worked on the case has written a letter to the Governor of Ohio stating that more investigation at the time should have been done , how the case was not fully investigated, evidence not submitted, and how she herself feels that Brett Hartmann could not have committed this horrific crime and is innocent on all charges. Brett recently also just found out that he has a 20 year old daughter that he never knew of. The two where just recently united after DNA tests were confirmed. I firmly believe that Brett Hartmann is innocent of all charges and should be a free man. With your help we may be able to make this happen. Thank You to everyone and God Bless You.
01:41 PM on 11/02/2012
I just woke up, so I can not rcall where I get this....It is better to free 100 of the guilty than to convict 1 who is innocent..... It is a good rule to adhere to as the guilty will reoffend again, conviction of the innocent puts them in an environment where criminal activity is a norm. They almost have to become one to fit in. Breaking that learned behavior is hard. Try quitting the learned behavior of smoking...
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Vesper Deveraux
Eschew Obfuscation.
06:16 PM on 11/02/2012
Say that to the parents of a murdering pedophile. How about saying that to the family of a murdered cable man who was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time. By your words you would free 100 of these vile, murdering psychopaths just to save one person. Do you even have any idea what 100 murderers/rapists/pedophiles can do with the time you're awarding them? What about all of the innocent men, women AND children they are going to murder because you'd rather set them all free and save one supposedly innocent person?
12:43 PM on 11/03/2012
Would your irrational reply be the same if you were the innocent convict?
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Ian Llangan
Your Invisible Sky Friend Is Morally Abhorrent
01:49 PM on 11/03/2012
You try putting yourself in the place of a wrongly convicted person.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
tjamman
Tax The Rich Until It's FIXED!!
07:19 PM on 11/02/2012
Let's try to keep that figure WELL below 100, shall we?
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12:18 PM on 11/02/2012
The prison system is a multibillion dollar entity in the United States. On average, there are more people in prison here than anywhere else in the world. Traveling as far back in time to the first century and beyond, innocent people were jailed for no other reason than suspicion based in fear. Some of us would prefer to believe satanic forces are external. ‘Where there is smoke there must be fire. ‘They would reject that good and evil exists within all humans. The policeman that arrests a person based on suspicion is just as evil as the lawyer who tries the case with no evidence to support his argument for incarceration and the jury who agrees on flimsy proof and the judge who oversees the court and allows the decision however flimsy, and the system that keeps an innocent man incarcerated. It is all evil doing. We are all given free will and have a choice between good and evil. The mom in this case chose to do good and live her life within the realms of Supreme Power. Her daughter benefitted and perhaps everyone her daughter comes in contact with in her future will also benefit. Someday prisons will be used only for those by choice, the most demonic among us.
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daily randy
Danger, Will Robinson! Danger!
11:48 AM on 11/02/2012
He looks guilty if you ask me. GUILTY!
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Ian Llangan
Your Invisible Sky Friend Is Morally Abhorrent
01:49 PM on 11/03/2012
I'm sorry - I must have missed the part where anyone asked your expert opinion.
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daily randy
Danger, Will Robinson! Danger!
10:29 AM on 11/04/2012
How rude! I'd comment on how you look as well, but you don't have a post of your picture on your avatar. So I'm just going to have to guess. You look ...... RUDE!
rkeeeballs
rock and a hard place
12:12 PM on 11/04/2012
I won't pre-judge you but if I did , you would not like my opinion. Looks don't mean much, except possibly in your world !....sad
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daily randy
Danger, Will Robinson! Danger!
06:41 PM on 11/04/2012
You know what's really sad? How many people don't understand sarcasm and humor. That's what is sad. So many serious people in the world who are incapable of finding humor in anything.