How We Can Come Together When Our World Is Falling Apart

photo by Mike Enerio

Here we are, a week later with more images of terror and broken bodies and weeping after Friday's attack in Nice. And just as I was about to publish this post yesterday, I learned about the policemen shot in Baton Rouge. Then shortly after, the protests in Cleveland.

It seems we must decide for ourselves if we will become who the media says we are becoming. Or if we won't. If we will prove them wrong and become something new up and out of all these ashes.

I want to be a new. Do you?

But it doesn't happen in a vacuum. It doesn't happen when we're huddled up on " a side" or hiding for fear of it all. It happens in relationship. We've got to come together when the world seems to be falling apart.

That's a pleasant thing to say and a harder thing to do. Not because we don't want to, but mostly because we don't know how. Sure we can cling to those who are like us and those who agree with us. But what about those who think, act, and look differently than we do?

How do we come together for real, rather than just throwing words around?

Last week, I wrote about how we must humble ourselves and listen to one another. But what does that look like in action?

First, it looks like being honest about our own brokenness. Admitting our fears and hang-ups. Opening the hatch on the junk we tend to keep locked in the trunk.

The first step is being humble and admitting to ourselves and to God,

I am broken too. I do things that hurt others and hurt myself. I cannot point to the specks in other people's eyes until I acknowledge and ask for help removing the 2x4's in my own.

Because the 2x4's in our own eyes are often the things blurring and skewing our vision. They keep us from seeing clearly what is really going on in the lives of others.

Second, it looks like getting to know the 2x4's in our own eyes.

We tend to think of our enemies as outside of us, but the most dangerous one can hide within. The 2x4's in our own eyes are often set with a strong sense of pride, which makes them hard to see.

We can all use help finding these any day of the week. So, try this...

Consider these statements not only for the inciters and perpetrators of hate and terror, but also for people in your community, your neighborhood, your office, and even your home.

• He/she does/says ____________, and I would never...
• He/she is absolutely wrong about _________ because...
• He/she will is never willing to see my side of_______________.
• He/she doesn't deserve my respect because ______________.

Am I saying there are not absolutes in this world when it comes to moral conditions?

Not at all.

But I am saying that judgment is to come not from us but from Elsewhere. And it's not made based on appearance or what we think we see, it's evaluated by what's in a heart. And you and I can't see what's in a heart, what experiences make a heart beat the way it does.

So third, we must admit we may not have the whole story.

That there is absolutely more to the other person than meets the eye.

And fourth, we need to learn something about him or her.

We need to lay our 2x4's down, so we can make eye contact, really see the person with an open mind. Whether the person is warm to our effort or not, we won't be offended (because remember, we are operating without 2x4's). We can simply say, "I'm sorry we're in this spot. How can we figure this out together?" Then, listen.

This is where healing starts in our families, our neighborhoods, and our nation. With acknowledgement of our own brokenness and 2x4's... then the healing words, "Let's help each other."

Because we are exponentially more together than we can ever be apart.

If we really want to do something about the mess we're in, then we can apply this process to one person who rubs us wrong this week.

Shall we do it together?

If you are struggling with anxiety and fear in the midst of all this upheaval, here is a free guided meditation for you.

This article first published on Purpose Dweller.