Chris Matthews Sees Avatar; Forgets Characters Are Blue

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) - On his television program Hardball last night, host Chris Matthews revealed that he had seen the Oscar-nominated film Avatar and for an hour had forgotten that the alien characters, the Na'vi, were blue.

"I'm sitting there in the theater with my 3-D glasses on and here are these blue creatures talking to a bunch of white guys," Mr. Matthews said. "And for about an hour there I totally forgot they were blue."

Despite an awkward silence from his on-air guests, Mr. Matthews continued: "I mean, I totally forgot they were blue. And I forgot that they had three fingers and looked like cats."

"It says a lot about where our society is in 2010 that a bunch of white guys can be talking with a bunch of blue cat people with three fingers, in 3-D and what have you, and nobody makes a big deal out of it," he said. "I mean, that blows my mind in a way."

Mr. Matthews revealed that in addition to forgetting that the Avatar characters were blue, earlier in the day he had also forgotten his car keys, his home address, and to put his pants on.

Elsewhere, White House chief of staff Rahm Emanuel apologized to liberal activists for calling them "retarded," telling them, "I sincerely ask you cocksuckers for forgiveness." More here.