THE BLOG

Fox News Reports No Link Between Matches, Gasoline and Fire

01/11/2011 06:53 pm 18:53:04 | Updated May 25, 2011

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) - The Fox News Channel today attempted to bust what it called a "mainstream media myth" by reporting that there was no link between matches, gasoline and fire.

"Gasoline and matches don't start fires," said Fox host Glenn Beck. "People start fires."

Mr. Beck went on to say that there was no link between "oxygen, hydrogen and water."

Elsewhere, Verizon trumpeted its new iPhone, announcing, "For the first time, consumers will have a choice of which wireless carrier drops their calls." More here.

The Los Angeles Times says Andy Borowitz has "one of the funniest Twitter feeds around." Follow Andy on Twitter here.