Spitzer: I've Been Screwed

Embattled New York Governor Eliot Spitzer held a hastily scheduled press conference to answer charges that he patronized a prostitution ring, telling reporters, "I've been screwed."

While Mr. Spitzer refused to elaborate on his comment, he added for emphasis, "I've been screwed and it's cost me a lot."

Aides to the New York governor applauded him for responding quickly to the charges but across the state political observers wondered if he had raised more questions than he had answered.

Mr. Spitzer, who has endorsed Sen. Hillary Clinton (D-NY), did receive a vote of support from her husband, former President Bill Clinton, who offered to "take over his position" if the governor is forced to step down.

"I am happy to perform all of the roles that Eliot has been performing," Mr. Clinton said, adding that he had the experience to make crucial phone calls at 3 A.M.

Andy Borowitz is a comedian and writer whose work appears in The New Yorker and The New York Times, and at his award-winning humor site, BorowitzReport.com. He is the host of "Countdown to '08" at the 92nd Street Y on Tuesday, May 13 at 8 PM with his special guests Susie Essman (HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm) and Jeffrey Toobin (CNN, bestselling author of The Nine. For tickets, go to 92y.org.