I'm a lot like Jessica Biel. OK, maybe not really, but I do have a list of some pretty persuasive reasons if you'll indulge me. First, we're both brunettes. Any objections? I didn't think so. We both went with color. She wore pink for the big day, and I wore red. My groom entered our reception to "SexyBack," hers wrote the song. And finally, her new husband is musically-inclined and so is mine.
Where do we differ? There are the obvious fame and fitness disparities that I'm sure you're listing in your head right now. However, when it comes to saying "I Do" there is an additional, more striking contrast.
My better half, the lead singer and songwriter of indie band Bad Lucy, didn't serenade me with his dreamy falsetto. On the other hand, Mrs. Timberlake's new groom recently revealed he sang as his bride walked down the aisle.
In theory, it is the fairytale moment every bride might hope for. Even I, admittedly, wished and asked for a secret song in my honor at our reception. But the theoretical and the reality of your big event are two different things. And, in hindsight, I am thrilled and truly grateful my groom didn't take to the microphone.
Convincing your fiancé to serenade you, whether he is a trained singer or not, might not be the best idea, and here's why:
Emotional overload: Unless your groom has been performing day in and day out since he was on the Disney channel, the emotions of the "I Dos" might be too much. My groom didn't want to take on the added pressure of having to perform at his own wedding. "I want to feel and embrace the emotion of each moment and let nothing get in the way of that," he told me.
When I saw him, with tears welling up over his baby blues at the end of the aisle, I felt peace and joy knowing he had the freedom to feel without being distracted by the anticipation of performing.
You and your groom should be carefree, focused on taking it all in. Despite all the pomp and circumstance we put into weddings, they are not meant to be performances. The most beautiful unions are those when both the bride and groom are at a raw and emotionally vulnerable place.
It's expected: If your fiancé is a singer, people might expect a song. If he's a comedian, guests will assume he'll rattle off some jokes at the reception. Expected details, performances included, leave less of a 'wow' impression than true surprise moments. What if Justin read a poem dedicated to Jessica instead or what if she sang at the reception?
Remember, garnering more buzz about your big day often requires you to stray away from the norm.
No solos, this is a duet: There is no "I" in team, and the marriage you are about to embark on is about teamwork in every sense of the word. If a memorable performance is really important to you, I vote for bride and groom dances, songs or comedy duets. Doing something together is not only fun on the day of; it also brings you together during stressful planning moments.
OK but really, it's about the bride: There is a little Bridezilla in each one of us, and this is a somewhat acceptable form of the condition. This is your day, and the last thing you want is a distraction when you are walking down the aisle or making your grand entrance. Cameras, both still and video, should be pointed in your direction, all eyes on you. Right? OK, maybe that is a bit vain, but you get the point.
Lucky for me, I couldn't heavy hand my crooner groom into a wedding day performance. Instead, I have a lifetime of giggles courtesy of the video of our silly dance routine. Our number won't win any awards, but we did it together. And, with a little patience, I finally got my song. One year after we tied the knot, my best friend wrote the song "Weather" about our union. "You and I, we go together no matter how high comes up the weather."
Our 2024 Coverage Needs You
It's Another Trump-Biden Showdown — And We Need Your Help
The Future Of Democracy Is At Stake
Our 2024 Coverage Needs You
Your Loyalty Means The World To Us
As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.
Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our news free for all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
The 2024 election is heating up, and women's rights, health care, voting rights, and the very future of democracy are all at stake. Donald Trump will face Joe Biden in the most consequential vote of our time. And HuffPost will be there, covering every twist and turn. America's future hangs in the balance. Would you consider contributing to support our journalism and keep it free for all during this critical season?
HuffPost believes news should be accessible to everyone, regardless of their ability to pay for it. We rely on readers like you to help fund our work. Any contribution you can make — even as little as $2 — goes directly toward supporting the impactful journalism that we will continue to produce this year. Thank you for being part of our story.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
It's official: Donald Trump will face Joe Biden this fall in the presidential election. As we face the most consequential presidential election of our time, HuffPost is committed to bringing you up-to-date, accurate news about the 2024 race. While other outlets have retreated behind paywalls, you can trust our news will stay free.
But we can't do it without your help. Reader funding is one of the key ways we support our newsroom. Would you consider making a donation to help fund our news during this critical time? Your contributions are vital to supporting a free press.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our journalism free and accessible to all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.
Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our news free for all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. Would you consider becoming a regular HuffPost contributor?
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. If circumstances have changed since you last contributed, we hope you'll consider contributing to HuffPost once more.
Support HuffPostAlready contributed? Log in to hide these messages.