More

Featuring fresh takes and real-time analysis from HuffPost's signature lineup of contributors
Arnold M. Eisen

Arnold M. Eisen

Posted: December 16, 2010 07:40 PM

A Jew at Christmas


This Christmas will be the first since Justice Elena Kagan's reply to the member of the Senate Judiciary Committee who inexplicably asked her how she had celebrated Christmas last year. She replied, without missing a beat, that "like all Jews, I was probably at a Chinese restaurant."

That line became instantly famous and beloved among American Jews -- and not only because the wit and honesty it exhibited seemed to presage a career on the court of which Jews and other Americans would be proud. Something else got expressed at that moment: The fact that a future Supreme Court justice was so totally comfortable in her own skin as a Jew, so utterly confident of her standing as an American, that she could not only aspire to serve on the nation's highest court but confess her enjoyment as a Jew at Christmas. It was an important moment, all the more so for being light-hearted; it expressed part of what is uniquely precious about being a Jew, or a Christian, in America.

I understood, as a boy growing up in one of Philadelphia's ethnic neighborhoods, that I had just as much claim on America as the Catholics whose church stood on the corner three blocks away or the Italians who strode down Broad Street in the Mummers' Parade on New Year's Day. My at-homeness in the United States did not come despite ethnic and religious differences such as these but because of them. My family and I took our legitimate places side by side with other Americans by virtue of the hyphen in our identities. We proudly put out flags on the Fourth of July, attended interfaith services on Thanksgiving morning, and displayed brightly lit Hanukkah candles in our windows. Some of our neighbors put candles in their windows too, others whom we knew to be Jews did not light candles or display them, and still others -- more and more, as I got older and the neighborhood changed -- had Christmas decorations both inside and out. They included the Ukrainian families with whom we were friendly despite the fact, as my parents relished telling me, that Jews and Ukrainians had not gotten along well in the old country. This was America. We publicized the miracle of Hanukkah in our windows without hesitation.

There were some awkward moments at Christmas, I confess. What should I do when singing Christmas carols in elementary school assemblies? I wasn't bothered by the fact of the songs. Christian teachers led us in recitation of the 23rd Psalm in class each morning, if memory serves. That's how I learned about "Judeo-Christian America." The prayer seemed to fit right in with the Pledge of Allegiance and "The Star-Spangled Banner." I don't think I was bothered, either, by the fact that Hanukkah was represented in school assemblies only by a token song or two among what seemed to be dozens of Christmas carols. Hanukkah menorahs would sometimes appear that way in department stores, I noticed: a modest appearance dwarfed by giant Christmas trees and pervasive holiday decoration.

I knew Jews were a minority in this country. It was a point of pride for my parents and teachers that we clung faithfully to traditions such as Hanukkah in the face of so much Christmas -- and a source of pride in America that we could do so, for the most part, unmolested. Even as a teenager I followed with interest the Supreme Court cases that drew the line between legitimate public expression of Christmas as an American holiday, beloved of the country's majority, and illegitimate state support for observance of Christmas as a religious holiday. Trees were okay on civic property by this reasoning. Creches and crosses were not.

The distinction jibed with my comfort in singing "Silent Night" or "Adeste Fideles" during school assemblies -- and my discomfort at bringing my lips to form words such as "Christ the Lord." Mid-song, I'd turn in an instant from full-throated performance to barely audible mumbling and look around furtively to see if Christian friends and teachers had noticed the switch. (I also wanted to find out if Jewish friends had taken the same evasive action I had.)

I love Christmas carols to this day. Not just the secular ones, sometimes written or performed by Jews, that make it perfectly okay to enjoy the holiday without ambivalence or embarrassment: "White Christmas" or "Walking in a Winter Wonderland." I enjoy the religious tunes just as much: the "rum pum pum pum" of "The Little Drummer Boy"; the dignified, comforting waltz of "Silent Night"; the grandeur of "Adeste Fideles," undiminished in my mind by a rendition lacking the triumphant affirmation of its last three words. It matters that Jesus was a Jew, of course. I feel the pride of many Jews in being connected to his courage and his teaching, whatever theology and history have gotten in the way over the centuries. As a religious Jew, I relate easily to the satisfaction Christians take in focusing themselves and the country for one short spell on the values that should be guiding us year-round -- and appreciate why some religious Christian friends recoil in horror from the merchandising that often seems to drown out hopes for "peace on earth and goodwill among men," let alone obedience to God's will. I like to sing, and the songs are good. The world needs brightening this, as every, December. Hanukkah lights can use the help of Christmas cousins.

Some Jews, I know, have trouble with the holiday. They get tired of clerks at the check-out counter thoughtlessly saying to their kids, "And what do you want Santa to bring this year?" They resent not being able to enter a store, or ride down a street, or turn on a radio without being subjected to what can seem propaganda for a holiday, a religion, a vision of America in which they do not have a part. The holiday can be particularly hard for Jews who are married to Christians. Negotiation over celebration of Christmas is a notorious point of discord. (Exhange presents? Decorate a tree? Spend Christmas Eve at the in-laws' house? Have Christmas dinner with a ham on the table?) Crossing boundaries is a lot easier when the boundaries themselves are clear.

I won't be going to a Chinese restaurant this Christmas Eve, or (my family's custom) catching a movie, or attending one of the many churches in New York City that offer midnight concerts to the public. For this Christmas Eve falls on Friday night: the Sabbath. That "holy night" and holy day lend purpose and beauty to every one of my weeks and remind me, along with other members of the "people that keeps the Sabbath," of God's intentions for Creation. Oh well. Maybe next year.

 
 
 
This Christmas will be the first since Justice Elena Kagan's reply to the member of the Senate Judiciary Committee who inexplicably asked her how she had celebrated Christmas last year. She replied, w...
This Christmas will be the first since Justice Elena Kagan's reply to the member of the Senate Judiciary Committee who inexplicably asked her how she had celebrated Christmas last year. She replied, w...
 
 
  • Comments
  • 159
  • Pending Comments
  • 0
  • View FAQ
Comments are closed for this entry
View All
Favorites
Recency  | 
Popularity
Page: 1 2 3 4  Next ›  Last »  (4 total)
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
04:54 PM on 12/26/2010
Religeous observances, the rituals, music, prayer, well wishing, etc.... from all the faiths are good for all people and for the entire planet. When my Native friends pray for the healing of the planet they pray for me as well. I hope people remember your religeous faith is primarily an accident of birth. Try to keep the entire planet in your heart.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
FPhoebe
HP badges make me feel validated.
11:42 PM on 12/25/2010
I celebrate Hanukkah with my boyfriend and his family, and he celebrates Christmas with me and my family. Works out pretty well for everyone.
demwolf
old enough to know better
08:54 PM on 12/25/2010
I am Jewish, and my father was born on Christmas Day. When I was little, I thought all our neighbors were celebrating my dad's birthday!
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
wardropper
Highly-detailed empty micro-bio
08:09 PM on 12/25/2010
This is a lovely perspective and an important contribution to world peace.
I was not brought up in the Jewish faith, but I have no patience with people who will wantonly forget that Jesus was a Jew.
For me, He is the answer, but I had the good fortune to have learned about Him and seen His teachings in action, having been brought up by unusually selfless parents who actually ACTED as if those teachings meant something to them beyond the mere words.

It must be much harder for people with another type of upbringing to experience similar inspiration, but for me it all boils down to one important thing - a thing which is so unpopular and unfashionable today that it makes people boil with rage:

"My Kingdom is not of this world".

And that, I'm afraid, is what makes the American Dream a tragic illusion.

Still, if I try to be positive about the future of the human race on this planet, I take heart from articles like this one, where intellect and heart combine in the attempt to find balance.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Barbara Hill Bissonnette
08:00 PM on 12/25/2010
I am in a large multi-faith extended family, and we celebrate all holidays. We are all, for the most part, in the liberal or ecumenical congregation, and the dinner conversations are lively and amazing! We sing Chrisanukkah songs, changing the lyrics of Christmas carols. Last year's was "I'm Dreaming of a Good Whitefish." I realize I am very lucky. None of us takes our beliefs and traditions so seriously that it causes any problems. And I don't mean that I am not devout. I am indeed a devoted Christian, I just think we all go on different paths to enlightenment. Happy Holidays everyone!
07:00 PM on 12/25/2010
We just finished a traditional Jewish Christmas
Chinese food and a movie.
Last night we observed Nittel Nacht by reading secular books and playing cards.
06:43 PM on 12/25/2010
I want to hear the Taoist, the Buddhist and the Muslim perspective as well.
07:02 PM on 12/25/2010
Taoist: Who's this "Jesus" character?
Buddhist: Who's this "Jesus" character?
Muslim: He probably wasn't born on that day, but we honor the birth of the Prophet Jesus son of Miryam (pbuh).
06:04 PM on 12/25/2010
It really does seem like this is unique to America. I currently live in London and I was stranded due to the incompetence of Heathrow's management to deal with snow. My flatmate took pity on me and invited me spend Christmas with her family. They're Jewish. I told her I was already invited to Christmas lunch by another friend...who happens to be Jewish. My boss is also Jewish (non-observant, though) and he is celebrating Christmas with his family. In fact, it seems like every Jewish person I know here gets into the Christmas spirit. The only exception I've come across is a Jewish American friend. I suppose in the UK the emphasis of Christmas is more on spending time with family than on the religious aspect. I'm sorry for the anecdotal evidence, but it really does seem like an American issue.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
joncavanaugh
I am, and forever remain, at your service.
05:53 PM on 12/25/2010
In our house, even though we were primarily Catholics, we had a Menorah as part of our decorations because my parents felt we were all celebrating the season together. At least that is what they taught us kids. Today I have my own Menorah that is part our tradition and I tell my Grand Daughter about Hanukkah and it's significance. However, because the holidays have been so polarized by all sides, we just keep it all quietly to ourselves, thank you.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
teddyr
05:41 PM on 12/25/2010
Love this article. It is so very true. Someone once said that a Jewish child looks at Christmas like "a wonderful party that he is not invited to". It has always been a Jewish challenge to be entertained and busy while the whole world celebrates Christmas. ie a movie and Chinese food. And, ironically, there is no limit to the vast array of Jewish Holidays and celebrations, Rosh Hashona, Yom Kippur, Passover, Chanukah. And tons of holidays inbetween. So we should be very satisfied. Yet, we are still envious. I need to go and eat my Chow mein. Shalom
06:27 PM on 12/25/2010
As a Catholic, when I was living in NY, one of my favorite moments was the lighting of the menorah in Central Park, the world's largest, I believe. Or assisting our Jewish patients light the shabbos candles at Mt Sinai Hospital.
Lights and religion. A winning combination all around.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
teddyr
01:46 AM on 12/27/2010
And as a Jew, I enjoy celebrating Christmas eve with my Catholic friends in their home (a tradition that has spanned 25 years) We are so lucky to be living in the USA, where we can openly share a wide variety of cultures and traditions. And why do we, as Jews, give gifts, on Chanukah. Certainly not because it has anything to do with our religion. There is nothing in the Chanukah story or the Talmud that requires the buying and giving of gifts. We do it because it is December and the Holiday Season, and everyone is participating. Jewish Children sit on Santa's lap and the stores have everything in the window from dolls to Play Stations, to Kindles.
Is this bad. No it is not bad. It is fun. But, ironically, it is not a necessity for the celebration of either religious holiday. That's what makes both Chanukah and Christmas so much alike.
04:39 PM on 12/25/2010
Is it really insensitive for a store clerk to ask what a child wants from santa? If I were in Isreal and a clerk asked my child what she wanted for hanukkah I would think she was trying to be nice.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
tsudopnem
I'm just this gal, y'know?
08:54 PM on 12/25/2010
In America it is. America isn't as homogenous as Israel. I'd let the clerk know that my children are smarter than that.
04:15 PM on 12/25/2010
Years ago when I lived in LA I would invite my some of my Jewish friends over a few weeks before Christmas for dinner and tree trimming. They loved it and it became a kind of tradition, each couple brought an ornament--I never asked them to, they just did--and they were absolutely stunning, unique and special, just like them. Every year when I trim the tree with their ornaments it brings back memories of those special nights.
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
01:32 PM on 12/25/2010
Since Christmas is fundamentally a religeous date on the Christian calendar, marked with numerous rituals and services, why would anyone want to make compromises in its observance? Either practice the faith or not, but why compromise your faith.

Oh, you mean that secular thing with the Santy Claus and department stores and lots of presents for the kids. Well, that's different. Good luck with that thing.
12:51 PM on 12/25/2010
I am Jewish and my husband was brought up Catholic (by his own choice he hasn't practiced his faith in years).

We don't have a tree, but this year, I did put up some lights around the house to make it cheery. On Hanukkah, he helps me light the menorah. We don't exchange gifts on Hanukkah or Christmas; we wait until New Year's Eve. It's our compromise. It gives us something to look forward to and some extra time to shop.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
benskelly
08:37 PM on 12/25/2010
So, menorah, no tree - I think you won.

I honestly don't understand why people take this stuff so seriously. Why not celebrate BOTH holidays and not ask either person to change for the other?
11:57 AM on 12/25/2010
The test of Christianity is so absurd. When you think about it, Jesus said the greatest among you shall be the least. We constantly miss that and people choose to "rate" one's faith.

I just know that Christmas is important to me and Midnight mass the greatest of all