Nicola Peltz is pretty cute, but she's no Megan Fox. That's what Michael Bay has turned my thoughts to these days. Damn him.
With the cacophony of explosions and annihilations, the ultimate Hollywood director has pretty much worn down critics and is starting to even wear down fans. His movies of the past five years are pretty much one giant robotic transformation and occasional fireball. If you need help separating them from each other, your best bet is the collection of beautiful women he has managed to drop front and center into the middle of the action. His most recent, Transformers: Age of Extinction, is no exception as Nicola Peltz's shorts get shorter with each scene (I mean... even her father, played by Mark Wahlberg, comments on how they're shrinking before his eyes. If there's one thing Bay knows how to do beyond just blowing sh*t up, it's to launch some babes into the celeb stratosphere).
If we go back over the past 20 years, we can really see that not much has changed when it comes to his casting process. But that doesn't mean we shouldn't take the time to make sure we really see the journey up close. So... let's meet Bay's babes.
10. Vanessa Marcil
Remember The Rock? Of course you do. Remember the lead actress in it? Of course you don't. Her name was Vanessa Marcil, and for some reason she found Nicolas Cage's nerdy, record-collecting FBI scientist really cool and fun. Marcil was not caught up in the action the way other "Baybes" have been, but her smile when she pops up is such a welcome addition to an otherwise tense two-and-a-half hours. While we were not treated to too many scantily clad moments à la Bay, we got an adorable turn by a gorgeous actress we all treasured for the two years she was actually popping up in films.
9. Bar Paly
She may be the sexiest Israeli import since... um... uh... Well, she's just the sexiest Israeli import, period. Pain & Gain is such a strange movie, but I ended up digging it once I just accepted it as a raunchy comedy. In the middle of all the drugs and thievery and biceps and tank tops, there is Bar Paly. We don't get much of her onscreen, but when we do, she steals those moments. Michael Bay strikes again with his ability to get actresses to wear anything (or basically nothing) and still carve out a character. She may have even raised the 'bar'...? I'll see myself out.
8. Scarlett Johannson
Ahhhhh...ScarJo. It was only a matter of time before she actually landed in front of Michael Bay's lens. She just looks like she was born to run around in a skin-tight white jumpsuit in a futuristic setting as she navigates the action-heavy world of one of his wildly unrealistic scenes. It almost feels at times like she was the only reason he finally got this movie off the ground. Thankfully, ScarJo didn't get bogged down in this type of one-dimensional tripe -- and has continued to bless us in skin-tight outfits, albeit in clever films. Hell, her voice in Her alone was enough to get some of us going.
7. Gabrielle Union
This movie is so insane that it ends with a yellow Hummer literally destroying an entire village -- and it isn't even a Transformer. Somewhere in the middle of all the banter and action, Gabrielle Union manages to eke out a solid performance as a tough chick who can keep up with Will Smith's tough-talking and quick-witted lead. She does the job well -- and it makes you hope that, if the Bad Boys 3 rumors are true, she'll be in on the action.
6. Nicola Peltz
I just saw the most recent Transformers movie and this girl got a ton of screen time. She's cute and not a half-bad actress. It felt a little weird, though, as Michael Bay insisted on shots of her tiny jean shorts taken from the ground up while also being reminded every two seconds that her character is only 17. Umm... With that in mind, I will only say that Ms. Peltz will make a lovely woman someday. That is all you can quote me on... that and the fact that she really handled looks of sheer terror (as robots attacked her family) with aplomb.