Tommy Wallach

Tommy Wallach has been playing music since he was seven years old, when his mother bought the ghetto-ass Estey baby grand that he plays to this day. After a short and undistinguished classical career (the sole highlight of which was Tommy's being demolished at the Seattle Young Artists' Festival by a cadre of Suzuki-trained Japanese kids who were all accepted to Julliard at the age of 11), Tommy gave up classical piano and turned to theater, a period of his life that deserves its own paragraph.

Tommy performed in numerous community and professional productions in Seattle, including the critically-acclaimed 'Falsettos' at the now defunct Group Theater (R.I.P), which ran for over 100 performances and convinced Tommy to give up theater. He returned to the stage only to play a kangaroo in an exceptionally embarrassing production of 'Children of Eden,' though he does not like to talk about it.

Tommy's interests then turned to writing, where he has already had numerous successes, including being published in McSweeney's and Tin House, two very prestigious literary journals that 99.99% of the universe couldn't care less about it. Tommy, however, thinks they are awesome, and has issued a standing challenge to anyone who dares say differently to his face. 'I will crush that person,' Tommy has said. He has written four complete novels (this is not a joke), and has had two separate literary agents (including the evil powerhouse ICM), but has never sold a book. He is currently writing his fifth novel, which is adapted from a 'This American Life' story that rocks.

Tommy tried his hand at pop music only after being re-inspired by musicians such as Ben Folds and Rufus Wainwright. He began writing seriously only a couple years ago, and has just finished recording a full-length, full-band album. He mostly plays piano and sings, but also dabbles in guitar, mandolin and melodica. He has played in venues from New York to Seattle to Dublin, Ireland, but only at one venue in each of the two latter locations, which is much less impressive, when you think about it. He has also played for Bill Gates, been remembered as "that boy, Tommy, who hounded me for an autograph last night" by Alicia Silverstone, and fantasized extensively about Fiona Apple and Ludivine Sagnier, sometimes simultaneously. If he wins a record contract with Decca, he might cry.