Co-authored by Jerry Wyckoff, Ph.D.
In a recent speech about child abuse, Kansas City Police Chief Darryl Forte gave the example of using an electric extension cord as "so-called discipline".
Study after study tells us that this kind of bullying in the name of discipline is leading to the high level of violence and child maltreatment experienced in this country. The thought of an adult, supposedly a caring adult, using such an instrument to "discipline" a child is beyond comprehension.
But not only is this sort of child abuse and resulting trauma tolerated in the name of teaching children right from wrong, but it has been institutionalized and, in some families, socially acceptable. According to a recent news report and home-made video, a 5-year-old boy was beaten with a wooden paddle by his school principal to teach him a lesson. These are only a few examples of the reported 45% of children in the U.S. who experience significant trauma due to maltreatment and exposure to violence before the age of 5.
Prevention Pays Off
We do not accept that this percentage is a "given": This kind of childhood trauma is "man-made" or "woman-made". It is not caused by children but happens to children. Change how adults treat a child, change the statistics.
We have known this to be scientifically true since the 1990s, when a California physician and the National Institute of Health collaborated in a study of adverse experiences during childhood, how those experiences affect life-long physical and emotional health. The adverse experiences studied fell into ten categories: verbal abuse, physical abuse, sexual abuse, lack of love and support, physical deprivation, divorce, alcoholic or drug abusing family member, mentally ill family member, imprisoned family member, and witness to the physical abuse of family members.
The study, later called the ACE Study, found that having experienced during childhood only one area out of ten resulted in a significant increase in smoking, heart disease, IV drug use, sexual promiscuity, STDs, liver disease, becoming a victim of physical violence, sexual assault, cancer, mental health problems, and obesity. The more categories of adverse childhood experiences, the greater the chance of bad physical and emotional health as adults. These outcomes make the reduction of adverse childhood experience a tremendous need for a national public health initiative.
It's Not Rocket Science, It's Brain Science
Children who suffer the trauma of adverse experiences during childhood are exposed to high levels of stress and, in effect, end up suffering from a form of PTSD, or as it was once called, combat fatigue. The increased stress levels produce high levels of cortisol, a stress hormone, that becomes toxic to the body. A child's developing brain is critically affected with the greatest damage being to the executive or reasoning part of at the brain. As a result, the traumatized child grows up being unable to control impulses, focus on tasks, moderate emotions, and function in school.
But why, you might ask, do some children escape adverse childhood experiences and grow to be healthy, productive adults? The ACE researchers found the answer: Children who had a consistently supportive, protective adult to depend on were able to reduce their stress level and the toxic effects of the stress, and thereby reduce the harmful physical and emotional results found in those without such support.
So, given the results of the ACE Study, it is obvious that the emotional and physical health outcomes of trauma caused by violence and maltreatment during childhood are not only predictable but wholly preventable. Children aren't born with toxic stress. We cause stress to become toxic in children's lives by how we treat them, often with the best of intentions, but with few of the essential skills of healthy parenting.
Want to stop damaging children's lives from childhood trauma and lower the lifelong risk of cancer, diabetes, heart disease, obesity, depression, suicide and violence? Look to the root of both: loving, caring, supportive and protective relationships with a child. Look to universal, early, healthy parent skill-building.
So this Mothers' Day, reach out and love a caring, supportive and protective mom... a priceless gift that can't be bought.
The new book, Discipline with Love and Limits, is the latest release from psychologist Jerry Wyckoff, Ph.D. and journalist and educator, Barbara C. Unell. They have been champions of positive, practical and proven parent skill-building for the past 35 years and have co-authored six books, including the bestseller Discipline Without Shouting or Spanking, that has sold over a million copies worldwide.
Learn more at Raisedwithloveandlimits.com