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A Hockey Mom's Rebuttal
Perhaps in the weeks to come I will change my mind. But while the world was listening to Sarah Palin, I was watching her as a hockey mom and as a parent of a disabled child. ("Special needs" is a term that guarantees they won't get what they need!)
For whatever it is worth here is what I think: Sarah Palin said that the difference between a pit bull and a hockey mom is lipstick. I think the true answer is deeper than that. I think that a true hockey mom tells her sons and daughters that being a good parent takes maturity. That if you are a teenager you might look for the resources in your parents' night table drawer. (condoms?) Abstinence clearly does not work. Parental understanding does.
On the next topic I would like to start a conversation with my sister mothers of kids with disabilities. I don't think I could have run for vice president of the United States in the months after my son Danny was diagnosed with severe autism. But perhaps I would have viewed it as a way to put him in an important spotlight while providing a distraction for myself? Not a bad thing. What do you all think?
Full disclosure: I am a life long Democrat and I wish Hillary was running. BUT discussion is GOOD.
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Full disclosure - as a lifelong Democrat are you voting for Obama or are you looking to rationalize a vote for McCain/Palin, as your posting seems to suggest.
Thanks for the question. I believe that how we vote is a private matter. Having said that I think I would have trouble rationalizing a vote for McCain/Palin. They'd have to prove a lot to me. I am not one of those Hillary suppporters running to McCain because of Palin. In fact,I am sending some signed books this week to an Obama fundraiser run by Ayelet Waldman. I am sorry if you misunderstood my intentions. They were to promote discussion not to announce my intentions.
Palin's vp speech was written by others I would guess but even at that to attack the very thing which makes American's proud with the community activities seems off message and the wrong thing to attack. She was the attack dog Mac wanted but above all his choice reflects just how badly he wanted to keep Obama off the front pages. I doubt mac sspent much time on the choice after he was denied his real choice except to shake things up for Obama. The attack ads were less effective so he needed someone who could attack for him. I doubt the vetting was done until after the fact as too many things have "popped up". Little packages of stink bombs Palin has done along the way. But the family bothers me as I had a special needs baby who died at three. There is no way I would have taken time away from my child to be in politics or place ambitions above my family. But that is me and I can see the needs of the child over mine. Palin never will.
Asking the question about her comptenence in regard to her four month old son (and a pregnant teen) is not sexist. She is the mother, the one who went to labor, the one nursing, its a natural and absolute law that no philosophical argument about fathers role can over turn.
What I find disturbing is this is a reckless character of Palin. In her own story she says she broke her amniotic waters while in a conference in Dallas TX but proceeded to continue with her seminar, then boarded a plane for an 8hr ride to Alaska and a 45 minute drive to her hometown to deliver. She was fully aware she had a high risk pregnancy at 44. This is not bravely, but an alarming question on her judgment regarding a very delicate and important issue. To then go back to work after 3 days, and accept a VP nomination 4 months later, and with a teen pregnancy, says everything about the price she is ready to pay for her political ambitions. Its frightening for its lack of caution, and disturbing for the welfare of the children.
Folks. I am sorry the Autism One link may not work. It's a living breathing radio station. But if you go to htttp://autismone.org/radio and search the archives you can find the show when the link becomes live,questions or problems please email me at fischkinb@aol.com and I can send you an attachment which is THE SHOW
many thanks! Barbara
It's that same line of thinking that she would apply to our nation as VP and POTUS if anything we're to happen to McCain. I have pointed out her religious radicalism before at http://debatetherace08.com, it's that line of thinking that she's right, and nothing will change that, that caused her to expect her daughter to just abstain. I go through the same thing with my X wife and my 15 year old daughter who, hopefully will listen to me and use protection when she decides to take that step. Her mother just thinks she won't because she takes her to church on Sundays.
As far as having the disabled child and running for VP.. I'm sorry but I have 4 kids and there's no way I could take that job no matter how qualified I were, my children are too important to leave to someone else to care for.
And the Hillary voters? Forget it, they will never support a woman that vows to preach in schools and outlaw abortion IMHO.
Dear Readers,
Now Cindy McCain says she was a Hockey Mom too. I invited both her and Sarah Palin to see my older son who plays on a hockey team for kids with autism. His younger brother, the hockey star of the family coaches. To hear this invitation please listen to my Internet Radio Show "Maverick Mama" on Autismone.org radio. Here is a link to the show http://autismone.org/radio/mediafiles/090508 Maverick Mama.WMA
And thank you all again so much for reading and commenting.
As a mother of four, she creeps me out. It's like a movie on Lifetime or something. Too scripted, too much drama. My gut tells me that, in the end, many women, and men, too, are going to vote against her because of the over-the-top family drama. She claims to want privacy for her children, but parades them out for the press to coo over and gain some kind of political points. The far right are such hypocrites when it come to "family values", expecting perfection of everyone else but themselves. The majority of women in this country do not have access to the childcare and healthcare that Sarah has, and the Repubs want to make sure that its not available either. They'd rather spend YOUR tax money on Iraq (because a constant war will benefit their fat cat corporate interests) instead of something citizens would actually benefit from.
My husband and I have both worked in special education. I appreciate the light Sarah Palin can shine on kids and families with all kinds of needs. But, only spending 8 hours a days with kids with high needs, I do ask "how is she going to do this"? It's not a challenge, it is a question.
Is it sexist? Yah, maybe. Just as it has been sexist to not admire fathers for being VPs and Presidents. I am hearing a lot about how moms can multi-task as if dads can't. We don't celebrate men for balancing life. Just as we don't ask how they do it. I know my husband has worked very hard at the balance with little kuddos.
But when was the last time a person ran for the two highest positions with an infant? When was the last time they ran with a baby with disabilities? I think this is the real question. I promise I would ask it if Todd Palin were the one running.
Jennifer
I don't think the question is sexist; while other Presidential & Vice Presidential candidates have had young children while campaigning, NONE OF THEM were those children's Primary Care-giver in terms of parenting. Not to mention the fact that none of those children were INFANTS with serious health or developmental issues.
Your mileage may vary.
It seems that she has labelled herself a "hockey mom" ... Does that mean that her kids actually play(ed) hockey? As far as being an advocate for children with special needs does that mean that we will advance our stem cell and genome research programs? Beyond that, I would like to understand why she had sex and a genetic test. After all, abstinence (no-sex) eliminates the need for abortion. As far as her future compromising of the constitution and going after pro-choice and teaching creationism, I hope she understands that we breed because it is the means of evolving our species. We can not stop breeding. Heck, even she could not. It is pro-choice that enables us fine-tune our evolution.
The only thing people are going to remember about her speech are all of the attacks. She needed to appeal to moderates. She has the far right in the bag. All they need to know is that she's an evangelical conservative with big talk. Moderates want to hear positions, not recycled old GOP talking points from Bush's speechwriter. You know what the moderate undecideds that I know are saying about the speech? "Man, she is angry. She's kind of mean. I don't like her." The Obama campaign has been nothing but nice this week. They have told the media to not bring the kids into it, even though many of us still feel it reflects her (poor) characer. The Obama campaign has said nothing but nice things about Palin. Yet, as the McCain campaign keeps reminding us, this election is not about issues. This is about belittling Obama and toting the trophy mom.
Yet, her speech comes all too late. Obama's speech, and indeed the entire convention, changed the election. People now know who Obama is and know what he is about. They like him and they like the direction he wants to take the country in. Using the same old attacks on his character aren't going to work. No one outside of the GOP is going to believe she has more experience or is more ready to lead than he is.
For Sarah Palin to return to work only days after giving birth, and accepting the VP nomination while her 17 year old daughter is dealing with a pregnancy is irresponsible. I would say the same thing for a father. We have family leave in this country for exactly these sorts of issues. Is the message Palin giving the rest of us parents that we should put our own ambitions before our families? When I decided to become a parent, it was a clear decision. I still had a successful career - but not at my child's expense. Isn't the church all about family first? I'm not seeing it.
Watching her, I thought what a great carreer she would have on Fox.
I think she majored in Jounalism....didn't she??
HuffPost's Pick
Part I
Considering that Sarah Palin has a terrible record in Alaska regarding funding
special needs children in the pulic schools (she cut funding) and cutting services to
teen mothers, I'd say she is giving the term 'soccer mom' a bad name and simply
using it to advance her own agenda. Her agenda you ask? Inside Sarah Palin is
still the high school mean girl who thinks she's the smartest, prettiest and
overall 'best.' That whole I'm better than you'll ever be thing and you'll never be 'Me.'
She's ambitious and is using her children to get some sort of weird sympathy.
Her choice to see her pregnancy through was hers to make and I am glad
to see that baby Trig has siblings who obviously dote on him. She tried but
failed to hide her 17 year olds pregnancy and then 'got indignant' when it
was discovered. Any mother that would put her teenage unwed pregnant
daughter through what she has over the past five days needs help.
Thanks for this. And thanks to everyone who has commented. My own email this morning has been very emotional. People either love Palin or they hate her.
I am pretty interested in exploring these special ed cuts. If anything, with the autism epidemic raging, more money is needed for special education not less. There are reports circulatiing that Palin has a nephew with autism, which does not surprise those of us who understand the extent of this epidemic. Everyone we know knows someone else with autism. If anyone knows where Palin stands on help for indivduals with autism, I would love to know.
I tried finding something relating to her stance on autism, but short of the usual campaign rhetoric on special needs generically I couldn't find anything specific. I did find out some interesting figures. Downs Syndrome babies are 10 times as likely to be autistic, with odds as high as 1 in 10 of susceptibility. Hopefully little Trig will be one of the lucky 9. Yet as governor she slashed the special ed budget by 62%. Gave it a good gutting.
I don't like this woman much. I just wanted to type that.
Simple answer - Palin is a radical conservative and stands on the WRONG side of most issues. This election is not about Palin, who clearly is not qualified, this is about the direction of America from November 4 forward.
"Inside Sarah Palin is still the high school mean girl who thinks she's the smartest, prettiest and
overall 'best.'"
Afte hearing her last night, I had this disturbing feeling that inside, Paline is more Cutthroat Karl Rove, than Soccer Mom Sarah.
Part II
I have been in touch with a woman in Wasilla, AK that is on Sarah Palin's
s-list and says that once you are there, it's a permanent position. "Mean Girl
Syndrome" The locals know that it's not a good idea to mess with Sarah and
that if you do it can be bad. So anyone that has anything to lose i.e.; business
owners, city officials and others and their family members kowtow to her.
She's a mini-Cheney in a skirt. So not sure what you were looking for
in comments but if you are still undecided in your vote I hope you'll
reconsider. As the mother of a special needs child you know how hard
the other kids can be on him or her and Sarah is just another one of
them all grown up.
Both of my sons are grown and did not have to struggle with any
disabilities but I have watched and been blown away by my own
sister's advocacy on behalf of her son who has Asperger's Syndrome.
She is my hero and she is the kind of mother that Trig Palin deserves.
And she'd take him in a heartbeat too!
Your sister sounds lovely. And the kind of woman who should be given a round of applause.
For now they'll give it to the "mean girl". But hopefully enough women out there remember the mean girls and want the special funding for special needs children and are also looking right past what Sarah wants toward what her daughter needs, and will vote accordingly.
What I saw was a woman who began her speech as a testimony to her family devotion. Her family involves a 17 year old girl denied sex education sitting in an arena with a 5 month pregnancy swell as the rest of the family passes a disabled infant around in a photo op as Mama beams and smirks.
Thanks for pointing that out. As a grandmother of 8, I was very creeped out by the constant passing of the baby from one person to the next. When Piper started spit-combing her sleeping baby brother's hair, I wondered where the hell the responsible adults in the crowd were.
Responsible adults??? At a REPUBLICAN convention???? Please be serious! The only responsible adults that I've seen in the last two weeks were either at the Democratic convention, or here, explaining why Sarah Quaylin is a HORRIBLE choice!
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Posted September 4, 2008 | 12:21 AM (EST)