Quick! What's the first image that pops into your mind when someone says feminist? Bra burnings? Gloria Steinem? Old news?
If you said Gloria Steinem, that's good. If you thought old news, that's not so good.
Born in 1956, I'm from the generation that came slightly after the brilliant, ferocious and committed vanguard of the women's movement, and I've enjoyed the benefits of their hard work. Like many of my peers (even those slightly older or younger), I've called myself a feminist. But am I really?
When I turned 50, I started thinking through every aspect of my life, reflecting on the past and planning for the future. In addition to assessing my health, eating, beauty routines, style, finances, relationships and so on, I also wanted to make sure that my voice was authentic and strong.
In my journey to discover who I really was -- and who I wanted to be -- after I turned 50, I reached out to many other women, to talk, to listen, to learn. Through one such new relationship, I met Marianne Schnall, founder and director of feminist.com. Talking with Marianne caused me to revisit my understanding of feminism, and to explore how (or if) it was still relevant in today's complex world. After all, hadn't women secured a better future as a result of feminism, and weren't there far graver and urgent problems to focus on now?
At the launch party I recently attended in honor of Marianne's new book, "Daring to Be Ourselves," which is a compilation of the best quotes from some of the worlds most successful women, Gloria Steinem described Marianne as a brave feminist: a woman who day in and day out walks the walk and talks the talk of feminism through her work, her writing, her roles as wife, mother, daughter, sister and friend. In her early 40s, she is leading the way for the next generation of feminists, and is doing it with conviction, love, and compassion. Marianne is a brave feminist.
But, Marianne, and other committed men and women who are working daily to secure the fundamental rights of women and girls around the world, have their work cut out for them. Author Isabel Allende, one of the many accomplished women who are quoted in "Daring to Be Ourselves," summed up the problem quite succinctly:
Today millions of young women who benefit from the struggles of their mothers and grandmothers and would not give up any of their rights don't call themselves feminists because it's not sexy. They believe feminism is dated. They have not looked around, they are not aware that today, in the 21st century, women still do two-thirds of the world labor and own less than one percent of the assets; girls are still sold into prostitution, premature marriage, and forced labor. In times of conflict, war, poverty, or religious fundamentalism, women and children are the first and most numerous victims. Women need all their courage today, as they needed it before.
Singer Annie Lennox, in an interview with Marianne, shared her views: "I get very frustrated when I hear women saying, "Oh, feminism is passé," because feminism means empowerment. We need feminism. It's not against men; it's about the empowerment of all."
In recent years, I found myself shying away from calling myself a feminist, because I, too --perhaps bowed by current social thinking -- thought that feminism was old news, and that the movement was still run by those who might be out of touch with today's realities.
But, I was wrong. Feminism started as a movement to change laws, and the perception of women as secondary to men. But, feminism has morphed into something much bigger and bolder, with an even greater potential to affect global change.
To embrace feminism is to embrace this fundamental truth: every human being has rights.
Feminism is more essential and relevant today than ever before. Just pick up any newspaper and see how the concepts of equality, tolerance and compassion, which are at the very core of feminism, are disintegrating around the world. Perhaps if those involved in the recent tragic bullying cases had been taught the tenets of feminism at an early age, these events would not have occurred.
On some very profound levels, feminism has become my own personal moral compass. It guides my daily behavior toward everyone -- regardless of gender, age, color, sexual orientation, creed or nationality, and I am raising my two daughters to be feminists as well. It's true, my heart is pulled more toward the ongoing plight of women and children around the world, including in our own country, but the moral code of feminism now shapes my worldview, and my approach to life.
It isn't always easy calling oneself a feminist, though, so consider yourself forewarned. People (men and women) will occasionally roll their eyes and make snarky (and ignorant) remarks about your political orientation. But, to be a brave feminist, you must ignore the noise, speak up, use your voice and be true to your own convictions.
Playwright Eve Ensler offers this advice: "Give voice to what you know to be true, and do not be afraid of being disliked or exiled. I think that's the hard work of standing up for what you see."
Even if you would never have called yourself a feminist in the past, consider it part of your future. But don't just be a feminist. Be a brave feminist.
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I thank you for taking the time to read it, and leave thoughtful, and thought-provoking comments. This is a subject that should be debated and discussed until every person, regardless of age, color, gender, nationality, or creed, can live a life without hate, without compassion, without inequality. A new year is upon us. Let's make 2011 the Year of Feminism for All.
Thank you, and Happy Holidays,
Barbara
I think the anger of older female Democrats during the 2008 presidential primaries speaks volumes. They railed against younger women for supporting Obama instead of Clinton (who was one of their own). What the older women failed to realize was that, having grown up AFTER civil rights and women's liberation, the younger women assume equal rights as a given while their moms assume that discrimination is still pervasive. The daughters have more in common with Obama than Clinton because they never experienced the discrimination their mothers still talk about with such passion. Their world is much more color-blind and gender-blind.
Unfortunately, that's the problem in a nutshell. Labels are divisive. By creating imagined differences, they're actually working to maintain the status quo instead of changing it.
As for "feminism" being a moral compass for change? I'll believe that when feminists like Martha Burk start advocating affordable universal health care instead of worrying about who exclusive country clubs are admitting as members.
I hope you have a wonderful holiday season, and a healthy New Year!
Best,
Barbara
Just my two cents. Equality comes with a level of respect for the choices made whether you agree with them or not.
Please re-read my article. I am arguing for rights and compassion for ALL people, and for broadening the term "feminism" to include everyone who is suffering the pains of inequality.
I appreciate your two cents!! Thanks for reading and commenting, and Happy Holidays!!!
Best,
Barbara
Your definition is one I like very much. The beneficiaries of true feminism, as you point out, are those of both genders, around equal opportunity, tolerance, and compassion. It's about. choice and options
Unfortunately, in our 1970s zeal, some of us naively thought that we could do it all - the infamous Super Woman Myth which we've held up as the ideal for decades. No woman can do it all alone, any more than a man can. We need each other - men and women both.
I have often wondered if "feminism" didn't require some blue chip re-branding. Something which is truer to the emotional core of a movement that formed my principles, but never took away from me my appreciation for men.
A brave and thoughtful article.
Thank you for commenting,
Barbara
http://dailyplateofcrazy.com/2010/12/18/the-feminist-factor-do-men-fear-women/
Engineering for example is often framed the wrong way to interest young women. Despite the fact that Engineering is about building, designing, and creating things. Something women are socially programmed to enjoy. Engineering is rarely explained to young women as anything other than "something hard to do, no man will ever marry you if you go into it because you will be smarter than them, and it isn't like a woman has the right mindset anyways." Which is total garbage that gets repeated over and over.
Thank you so much for this wonderful comment! You are a great role model.
All the best,
Barbara
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/naomi-wolf/jaccuse-sweden-britain-an_b_795899.html
The generalized misogyny that seems to inhabit the minds of males across the board isn't somethign that is going to disappear out of good common sense. We see in in our own culture, on this very board. It needs to be addressed MORE openly, not less, and women need to stop being bullied into pretending they agree with their own denigration.
Feminism has nothing to do about gaining special priviledges. It is about gaining equal access to the same systems for both sexes.
Thank you.
Pity the poor lad.
In 1980, I headed up a union teaching group showing women how to do a year long evaluation of their jobs for an equal pay for work of equal value initiative. I was shocked to find that, when stacked against the experience/education/duties of added responsibility of the male comparator jobs, my own job had to have half the duties removed and a pay increase of 44% when it was over.
The reason I'd become active in the union in the first place was because a senior buyer in my dept. would lurk around, rubbing my shoulders and waiting for me to go to the file drawer so he could accidentally grind against me. I was 19 and he was in his 50's or 60's and when I told him it made me uncomfortable, he laughed.. when I told our boss, he told me to be more of a team player. I helped write the sexual harassment policy that's still in place.
I wish things had changed dramatically but recently, when telling my story to a group of young women, all of them had a story of some inappropriate contact in the workplace and half had a story of being passed over or paid less than males in similar positions.
A feminist recognizes inequity and works to change it
I agree, and I woud extend that to include anyone who is being treated unjustly.
Thank you so much for commenting,
Barbara
Though ironically, feminist ideals, in practice, benefit men as well, especially in the US.
We see people live in ways opposed to their best interests. They vote against themselves They support the very people that abuse them. Women support their oppressors and believe they are getting ahead by it.
There is really no group stronger than women. If women wanted they could force almost anything to happen ..if they were united. Men are just not a match for women that understand men.
And by that I mean women that realize that in relation to women.. men are mostly bluff and show.
Nothing frightens them much more than a woman who will not be controlled.
Unfortunately women are not united. Divide and conquer is one of the weapons of male dominance.
Almost all males know that if they can confuse a woman they can probably control that woman.
I would say that there needs to be stronger voices and more women of good heart and clear minds to sacrifice themselves in the idiocy of politics so that we all may grow and find a better society before we plunge over the cliff.
In the end men and women will be equal whether they reach the heights together or crash to the bottom together.
Thank you for commenting,
Barbara
Men could not attain the power they have (throughout history) without women at home caring for their families and their homes. Yes, we allow it. We are as easily ingrained with traditional gender roles as are men. Kind of like we get the govt we want. However, I think any "movement" requires the participation of the majority (or the powerful as it were) to accomplish anything - like civil rights movement required the participation of white allies and the gay rights movement requires the participation of hetero allies. How do we convince men that feminist ideals can be beneficial to all?
Because they had two daughters, they had no choice other than to raise us to believe we could do anything we wanted. I liked the power-player aspect of my dad, and gravitated to that in my own marriage choice and also in my own career in business and medicine. But I very much subscribe to the softer, complementary-female role in my personal relationships with men. In fact, it has always served me well in my career to remain that same way in my interactions with professional men.
The result, now that I've entered my 51st year, is someone who believes in humanism. Not feminism. Not masculinism. Truly equal, inclusive humanity. We ALL ought to be advancing our notions in this way: embracing men, women, GLBT, and asexual-single types alike. It's time to see that women aren't the only ones who need empowerment.
Unfortunately, too many men are taught - by men, by women, and by society - that it's not ok to voice that stuff that roils inside. Too many men are taught how to be a man by the women in their lives. And how's that working for us so far?
Thanks for your thoughtful comment. Yes, the word "feminism" can be polarizing, which is why I am pushing for everyone to embrace it as a movement to ensure basic human rights for one and all. Hopefully, that simple concept will not polarize.
Best,
Barbara