If you know what you want to do, just do it.
Let me explain. Most people live confined lives because their true desires seem impractical. But when you set the game up so your "impractical" goals are your everyday experience, you live on a higher frequency.
For example, my wife is a huge Harry Potter fan. She would love to see the new Harry Potter play In London next summer. But we have three foster kids and a few days in London isn't exactly going out to dinner.
So, before we even began brainstorming how we could make it work, we set the idea aside and said, "It just doesn't make sense right now with all we've got going on."
But is that actually true?
Or did we give up before we even tried?
I called my mom and asked for some ideas on how I could surprise my wife. I told her, "I don't know how this will all work out with the foster care stuff, but I know if I just buy these tickets I'll figure out how to make it work."
"I love that," she responded, "Win and then play."
How you set the game up is far more important than whether or not you're playing the game. If you decide to win the game up front, you'll do everything in your power to get it done.
Far too many people are pretending to be in the game but are still sitting on the bench. They haven't decided they're in the game, let alone winning it.
It's not effective to be busy without purpose.
Far too many people aren't clear on what they want or the purpose of it. They live cowardly as mice when inwardly they are lions. They have big dreams and ambitions but simply haven't framed the game to facilitate those dreams.
So how do you set the game up to win before you ever begin playing?
Decide What You Want, Then Work Backwards
No two human beings are the same. So why should we have one standard of success? Seeking society's standard of success is an endless rat race. It's disgusting that we've been trained to be what others and society deem as worthy and good.
Instead, define success for yourself. What does the good life look like to you? What is your highest ideal? What is your perfect day? And what is your highest contribution?
Start there.
Or as Stephen Covey said in 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, "Begin with the end clearly in mind."
Mental creation always precedes physical creation.
Create Your Own Rules
When you begin from the end, you win before you play because you ensure you're playing the right game. Then, it's easy to clearly distinguish and remove everything that distracts from your end result.
When you play this game, you make up your own rules. The old rules only work to achieve other people's standard of success. Thus, in order to achieve your own ideal, you'll need to cast the old rules aside and create your own.
100 Percent Is Easier Than 99 Percent
Set it up so that you actually do win the game.
People are really good at self-sabotage. We consistently behave in ways that contradict our goals and ideals.
Conversely, Mahatma Gandhi has said, "Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony." The smaller the gap between what you should do, and what you actually do -- the happier you will be.
Ninety-nine percent commitment is hell. It doesn't work. It's nice in theory, but always ends in justification. We break our personal promises and don't achieve the goal.
Why commit 99 percent to something?
Do you want it or not?
It's easier to commit 100 percent and pass a personal point of no return. When you do this, you're no longer battling yourself. You're no longer unsure and left to wonder what the situation might bring. Your decision is already made. You don't have to make the decision over and over again. Losing is no longer an option.
For example, if you've made the decision 100 percent to get up at 5 a.m. to exercise because it gets you to your health goals, you're going to get up. If you haven't made the decision, you probably won't.
When you commit on this level, you cut away all other possibilities. This eliminates the risk in your pursuit. Risk only exists if you have a choice. Risk implies that there are two or more options. However, once you decide and commit, there is no more risk because there are no other options.
It takes guts to fully commit. It takes guts to fully commit to your dreams. But once you do, you change your entire trajectory. You force yourself to grow into your ideal, rather than just coasting and hoping to get there.
Have you fully committed and passed the point of no return?
Have you already won?
A Different Type Of Confidence Where Success Is Inevitable
In my Ph.D. research, I compare the differences between two groups of people: 1) entrepreneurs, and 2) people who want to become entrepreneurs.
The differences between these two groups are stunning. One difference is particularly interesting.
When I ask the question, "What would be the worst case scenario in your business?" the answers from both groups are generally quite similar.
However, when I ask the follow-up question, "What are the chances this will happen for you?" the wantrepreneurs almost always say something like, "Probably 50/50," or, "Well, I've heard 80 percent of companies fail."
They haven't won the game yet. They're still unsettled and unsure. They haven't passed the point of no return yet. So their fate is still a matter of chance.
Compare that uncertainty to a 20-something kid I interviewed yesterday who started and is trying to grow a tech company. When I asked him what the odds of him failing are, he responded, "It doesn't matter if I fail. I'm going to succeed."
During the conversation, it became shockingly clear that this kid was operating on a different level of confidence than most people I talk to. His father is an extremely successful entrepreneur. He and his 18-year-old brother have already started and sold companies. Business is in their blood.
He and his brother have been taught how to win the game before they ever play. They are actually playing an entirely different game than most people play. And they've been taught a set of rules that few operate on.
The cool part is, winning before you play is an internal thing. It's a mindset. It's a strategy. It's something anyone -- including you -- can learn and apply.
The problem is, you can read every self-help or business book in the world that teaches these ideas and yet remain unconverted. Which is why you need to pass the point of no return.
You have to drink the Kool-Aid and fully buy in. No one cares more about your success than you do. If you're unsure about yourself and what you're doing, don't expect confidence from others.
Once you take the leap -- which is an internal experience -- there's no going back. As Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr. said, "A mind that is stretched by a new experience can never go back to its old dimensions."
Are you ready to win, then play?
Connect Deeper
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