Age of Insecurity

I find it liberating to admit my age, to not define myself by my looks, to admit that I had to work to be "naturally thin."
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It's the truest cliche ever. Men age gracefully, and women end up just looking like hags. Men upgrade the wives that are their age for the newer, younger model (not necessarily fashion model but the younger version so to speak).

Then there are the inspirational exceptions. These are the men who embrace the age of a beautiful woman. And there are the women who don't fall prey to the youth obsession.

To me, a woman like Susan Sarandon is the truest form of beauty. She is wise, beautiful, she looks her age (whatever that may be) but the best version of herself and her age. No visible pulling or tucking or disproportionate features.

This comes to mind because I'm now 38. I'm on television, I'm photographed often, and when I look at the pictures, I see my lines. I see that even when in makeup, the dark circles and lines show through and are often accentuated by trying to cover them up. I've worked hard for and earned those lines. Those lines are paying my rent and not some man.

I'm on the Bravo network, a place where wealth and youth and beauty are commodities. I'm in the land of the weekly tabloids where skinny and pretty are more important than anything.

I find it liberating to admit my age, to not define myself by my looks, to admit that I had to work to be "naturally thin" as I discuss in my book.

I also find that more men are attracted to me now than in my 20's because I do not step out into life wearing my looks first. I'm no spring chicken, and any model or actress or reality star can take me down on looks in a minute. Trust me, the blogs remind me of that all the time.

But put me in a room with a group of supermodels, and I'll take any of them down on truth and personality and being evolved and being a strong woman. I think that's what women should focus on. I know a girl (a beautiful girl) who was dating a mogul. They were going to a New Year's Eve party and she said to him "I'm going to be the hottest girl in the room?" His answer was, "How silly. Who would want to be the hottest girl in the room? Wouldn't you want to be the most interesting girl in the room?"

I agree with him and think his wise comment is probably why he's a brilliant mogul.

Embrace your age and strive to be interesting first. Its so much more difficult than being the prettiest. Age goes. Interesting grows.

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