New Rule: A-hole in One Shouldn't Be Obama's Game
New Rule: President Obama must give up that awful habit that sets such a bad example for young people. I'm talking, of course ... about golf.
Golf, if you're not familiar, is a pastime where you basically walk outdoors with a bag, muttering and cursing. It's like being homeless in loud pants. Anyway, Time magazine is reporting that since he became president, Barack Obama has taken up golf with a passion, playing almost every weekend for the past few months -- and I feel betrayed. He campaigned as a basketball player. It said to us, "I'm urban and athletic and hip and a team player." Golf says, "I like Lipitor and white collar crime." And it's not just golf -- he's been purposefully eating a lot of hamburgers in public lately, to prove he loves meat. And he said that, unlike before he became president, he prays all the time now and that his Faith and Neighbor Initiatives Director sends him scripture on his Blackberry to start every day. Jesus, is there something about that house that turns people into assholes?
I kid the Commander in Chief, he's very far from an asshole, he's a cool dude, and I want to keep him that way! I don't want a regular guy running the country. We tried that for eight years and New Orleans still smells like mildew. Obama was different. He wasn't Joe Six-Pack. He had a six-pack. And when he gave a speech it didn't make English teachers cry. He wasn't some regular schmuck who spent five hours a weekend on the golf course. Why? Because he actually likes his family!
But Democrats have this bad habit of letting the Republicans scare them into acting more "regular guy" than they really are, and then they look inauthentic. Like Hillary drinking shooters. Like Dukakis in the tank. So I'm putting you on notice, Barack Obama: you're from Chicago, the day I see you in a duck blind, I'm taking my hope elsewhere.
So that's why I'm so worried when I see my president playing golf, because golf is a slippery slope. First comes the golf attire, then the golf stories and pretty soon you're telling black jokes. What's worse is that you know Obama doesn't really wanna be golfing, he's just doing it because he thinks it will relax the white people. "How could I be a socialist, I'm putting!" Well, I've got news for you, Mr. President, the people who think you want to kill their Great Aunt Millie aren't going to be swayed by a photo-op on the golf course. They see those photos, they're not thinking you're just like Tiger Woods, they're thinking, "Here comes the Angel of Death, and he's got a nine iron."
There is also a more serious side to this, because golf, hamburgers, and religion are all things that are incredibly bad for the environment. According to the U.N., in 15 years almost two billion people will be living in conditions of absolute water scarcity. And yet, a golf course in Palm Springs consumes as much water per day as an American family uses in four years. Golf courses in America consume over 114 million gallons of water a year on grass that doesn't even get you high. Golf courses also need large quantities of fertilizers and pesticides whose run-off pollutes the ground water for miles around.
This isn't just a third world problem -- there's a water shortage right now in the western United States. If I surpass my monthly water allotment here in Los Angeles, I'll get fined by the city. If I do it twice, they'll send 40,000 prisoners to live in my backyard.
But when it comes to bad for the environment, nothing -- literally -- compares with eating meat. The business of raising animals for food causes about 40 percent more global warming than all cars, trucks, and planes combined. If you care about the planet, it's actually better to eat a salad in a Hummer than a cheeseburger in a Prius.
There was a news story last week about the U.S. military warning America that the ripple effects from global warming inspired disasters could kill millions of people, but none of them can moonwalk, so nobody gave a shit. But if this "planet" problem is so dire the military is saying they're going to have to start dealing with it, maybe the president should set a better example about how we just can't live exactly as we always have and survive. I'm certainly not suggesting that we "take away" your golf or your hamburgers, but when it comes to being a role model on the environment, this president is out to lunch. With Joe Biden, eating greaseburgers.
Which is a shame, because he and his wife have demonstrated enormous power to lead by example. What they do, Americans want to do, because they're stars, and we're star-fuckers! And, like I said last week, we're not very bright, so we need direction -- if Obama grabbed Biden for lunch next week and ordered a veggie burger -- yes, Sean Hannity will call him a mincing fairy, like he did when Obama used mustard instead of ketchup -- like I ever knew one was more manly than the other. Stop caring what Sean Hannity and Sarah Palin will say about you. Be who you really are - a basketball playing, Jay-Z listening, city-dwelling hipster. The only sand trap I want to see you get out of is Afghanistan. And next time you have to get two guys over for a beer, smoke a little weed.
Bill Maher is the host of HBO's Real Time with Bill Maher, Fridays at 10:00PM Eastern Time on HBO. Guests on this week's program include Brad Pitt, Dana Gould, Ashton Kutcher, General Anthony Zinni and Ross Douthat.
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Bill Chameides: Don't Hummer Me In
Decisions to "buy American" when purchasing a car are understandable. But conflating a specific type of car and patriotic duty makes no sense to me.
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I have a degree in international agriculture and Bill is correct. Livestock in this country produce 291 billion pounds of wet manure each year, that's about 6 times the amount of the U.S. human population. That doesn't even account for the water. It takes on average 1,630 gallons to produce one pound of pork compared to 60 gallons to produce 1 pound of potatoes. I am not a vegetarian, but I do think that Americans should tone down on the meat consumption. We feed our cattle on a strictly corn diet, which four chambered ruminant animals are not designed to eat, so we can get cheap and fattening grease into our mouths. On a personal level I must agree, I am sick of golf. I think they should build government housing all around every golf course in America so the poor can watch the elitist discuss how they are going to screw them over.
Bill's comments regarding beef are erroneous. The UN report’s estimate for livestock’s contribution to GHG emissions (18%) is a global estimate, and not applicable to the United States or other developed countries. The entire U.S. agriculture sector accounts for only 6 percent of annual U.S. GHG emission, according to EPA (http://www.epa.gov/climatechange/emissions/downloads09/InventoryUSGhG1990-2007.pdf). Of this, all of livestock production is estimated to account for 2.8 percent of total U.S. emissions.
It is also important to point out that eighty-five percent of the land we utilize for cattle productions isn't suitable for crop production which more than doubles the amount of land available for food production. Since we have to double world-wide food production in the next forty years, this is highly important to consider. Food production is very complex and shouldn't be reduced to a sound bite. As the daughter of a small family farmer in Western Oklahoma, I am proud of the beef industry. America's farming and ranching families, 800,000 of us, work hard every day, whether we have 50 or 10,000 head to produce a safe, wholesome product for your dinner table and ours.
Not true. The EPA is nothing but a bunch of crooks.
Nn American scientist calculated that, making cheesburgers (from raising cattle to the burger you get on your plate polutes the air more than all vehicles on the road across the country. I'm not sure about the timeframe. A day or week or month.
The documentary was aired last year on Discovery or NGC.
Right effing on.
You keep it up Bill!
God I love this man! He speaks the truth with great humor. Thanks for an enjoyable post.
There is no way Pres. Obama is a "regular guy." Bush wasn't either--and calling him that is an insult to regular guys. But, back to Barack. He has a skill that MUST be used and is one that very few people in leadership positions possess to the degree that he does. That skill is his ability to give speeches and to talk with us. I keep remembering my days as a little kid when my family huddled by the radio to listen to FDR's fireside chats. This sort of thing needs to happen again.
I agree that our President needs to remain the person he was when we elected him. Doing things to cater to the conservatives isn't going to get him their votes, but could, over time, lose him liberal votes. We liberals need to be proud of ourselves, not apologetic. We also need to select our major talking points and keep repeating them over and over. It often takes a long time before stubborn or, perhaps, ignorant people, finally start thinking about what is being said. We ought to be able, for example, to do a good health plan without all the bad compromising, if we explain repeatedly our talking points. Even the fence-sitters in Congress will gradually get the message
On the contrary:
GW was a lying, dishonest, delusional, unscrupulous, selfish, venal, ignorant, crude, ignorant nit wit. In these ways, he was and is a man of the people.
Hold the phone! That's it! Bill Maher is being taken seriously. News flash, he's a comedian and his point is funny BUT if you think you can make Obama "one of yours" by hiding his golf clubs, well...
It would be nice if people actually understood how the mechanisms of government actually work. I have no doubt that if President Obama actually was a unitary power in Washington you'd be getting single payer health care coverage. Problem is legislation is made by the legislators in the House and in the Senate, particularly in the Senate. The best Obama can do (or any other president for that matter) is incrementally make things better. He can't even get Congess to stop spending money on jet planes no one needs. I hate this fact as much as anyone else but educating your neighbors and putting pressure on your congressman IS your best hope.
With the golf, also came the compromise . I'm afraid the Jimmy Carter comparisons are coming true. Regular guys don't make good Messiahs. Now he is backing down on the public option. Deeply disappointed in our new president. I was a believer. Now I feel like I did right before I became a 'recovering Catholic'. I am one of those people w/out health care now. and I lost it when it became unaffordable for a person who makes $40,000 a year. And I lost it at 61 years old1
Thank you, Mr. Maher, for telling it like it is. You are 100% correct that the president and First Lady do have enormous sway in leading by example. The trick, of course, is which path to choose. I must admit I had no idea the amount of water that's wasted on golf courses. It's a terrible awful luxury at that price, particularly with the looming crisis over water shortages that threatens to make our oil dependency issues all look like the good ol' days when gas was 35 cents a gallon. How are we going to get Americans to stop playing on golf courses, or how do we make courses eco-friendly? It's one thing to lead by example, another to take up a near lost cause and expect people to get behind it. I don't see how you can do it, short of some transforming technological innovation.
Likewise with eating meat. The kind of shift required to get the majority of Americans off their meat diets would probably take generations and serious psychological efforts, if it's even doable at all. It would be progress, though, if we could get a small percentage of people to seriously reduce the amount of meat they consume each year. A slow reduction over decades might be doable, but you're asking a lot here. Obama et al. could get the ball rolling, but can we really blame them if they don't?
Bill, I agree with you on most things but I'm a golfer that voted for Obama. It's not a bad game, many people play it including black basketball players such as Michael Jordan and Charles Barkley to name a few. Many athletes find it a great way to compete, stay somewhat active, relieve stress, discuss issues etc. I realize Obama plays basketball but that doesn't mean he can't learn something new as everyone can stand to do. As for the water consumption, many if not all new golf courses must recycle their water so as not to have any net consumption.
I know you're interests are in grass maybe you could check out a few different varieties. You're not as young as you used to be and it's a game you can play till you even more gray than you are now.
see you on the links.
aw
Bill, I love you but....You hang with the celebrity, you are no longer a plebe no matter how much weed you smoke. You speak as a citizen I know, but not a private citizen. You can afford to pass up the Top Sirlion at $1.99 a pound, I can't, you can have a chi-chi chef cook up some "Politically Correct" food, I don't. You have deep pockets, I sure as hell don't. When you have to feed a family, you need to plan for a week of groceries and when you've only got X amount of dollars, you'd be surprized at what your kids will eat when they're hungry. Come to dinner at my house, you can skip the meat and go straight to the weed. By the way GOLF IS BORING but mastering a thing is half the fun, maybe O is just trying to show he can play fair, meet a challenge head on. Even a President needs to chill so, as long as he doesn't ignore his call to duty what's the harm?
Its actually cheaper to feed a family on a vegan diet than it is on the American standard diet. Meat and cheese are expensive while rices, beans, pastas, etc. are not. So you can do it!
It's even a whole lot cheaper to be partially vegetarian. When I stopped buying meat (by that I mean beef, pork and poultry) our family grocery bill dropped by almost half. We still eat seafood, so we are not true vegetarians. I'm able to feed my meat-and-potatoes husband to his satisfaction without any "meat" whatsoever. Until people get out of the mindset that they "have" to eat certain things, then factory food mills will keep churning out cheap crap. Organic food will be less expensive when more people start buying it. Instead of eating cheap factory-produced meat every night, how about having free-range, pesticide and steroid and antibiotic free, organically raised "meat" less often? It is better for you (and your kids!) and better for the future of our civilization.
You hit it out the park Bill with your Smart President comments. This one was a high fly that got caught at the wall. I agree with the poster that our man is a jock and wants to show he can master this game like basketball. It is ironic that he can play on any course in America because of who he is and ordinary African-Americans can only be caddys and club house servers. Your theory that he is only doing this for photo-ops sounds very Limbaugh like. After all what better way to show he has a "deep seated hatred for white people" than to master a sport that historically was their last refuge from the riff-raf .
The planet will survive even if our President chooses and I mean Chooses to eat meat, play golf, smoke cigarettes. Get over it...he IS just another regular guy whom you had the misfortune to vote for.
Why don't we all just come right out and say what we REALLY think of why President Obama acts this way:
The Republicans got to him. Simple as that. He's either been bought off or (more likely) intimidated.
Don't you know you keep your friends close but yor enemies closer? Perhaps it is a trap.
Bill is brilliant. I must agree that we didn't vote for change so that President Obama could try to be like a "regular guy President". We had a regular guy as President last go 'round and it was not a good thing for us. Obama should be his Chicago living-hoops playing-surf swimming-wonkish self and not try to look "presidential" in all ways. It could cloud his thinking....
Bill is also right on about factory farming. The meat industry is America's greatest shame. in 1960 there were nearly a million pig farms in the U.S. Now there are just over 1200 much more intense ones and this is not a good thing for the pigs...
I agree that Bill is brilliant; most of the time. I'm just not sure that "W" was a "regular guy". If that means a guy whose heart pumps low grade crude and whose skull is filled with toxic gasses, then I guess you're right. What I can't accept is when he decided to go beat up a bully dictator, based on "adjusted" intel, and left the real War on Terror short handed. Net result? More young people coming home in a box. It doesn't surprise me that not many other nations of the world bought into that foolery. What does surprise me is how many held fast to their commitments in Afghanistan.
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