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Bill Maher

Bill Maher

Posted: March 12, 2010 06:44 PM

New Rule: Let's Not Fire the Teachers When Students Don't Learn -- Let's Fire the Parents

What's Your Reaction:

New Rule: Let's not fire the teachers when students don't learn - let's fire the parents. Last week President Obama defended the firing of every single teacher in a struggling high school in a poor Rhode Island neighborhood. And the kids were outraged. They said, "Why blame our teachers?" and "Who's President Obama?" I think it was Whitney Houston who said, "I believe that children are our future - teach them well and let them lead the way." And that's the last sound piece of educational advice this country has gotten - from a crack head in the '80s.

Yes, America has found its new boogeyman to blame for our crumbling educational system. It's just too easy to blame the teachers, what with their cushy teachers' lounges, their fat-cat salaries, and their absolute authority in deciding who gets a hall pass. We all remember high school - canning the entire faculty is a nationwide revenge fantasy. Take that, Mrs. Crabtree! And guess what? We're chewing gum and no, we didn't bring enough for everybody.

But isn't it convenient that once again it turns out that the problem isn't us, and the fix is something that doesn't require us to change our behavior or spend any money. It's so simple: Fire the bad teachers, hire good ones from some undisclosed location, and hey, while we're at it let's cut taxes more. It's the kind of comprehensive educational solution that could only come from a completely ignorant people.

Firing all the teachers may feel good - we're Americans, kicking people when they're down is what we do - but it's not really their fault. Now, undeniably, there are some bad teachers out there. They don't know the material, they don't make things interesting, they have sex with the same kid every day instead of spreading the love around... But every school has crappy teachers. Yale has crappy teachers - they must, they gave us George Bush.

According to all the studies, it doesn't matter what teachers do. Although everyone appreciates foreplay. What matters is what parents do. The number one predictor of a child's academic success is parental involvement. It doesn't even matter if your kid goes to private or public school. So save the twenty grand a year and treat yourself to a nice vacation away from the little bastards.

It's also been proven that just having books in the house makes a huge difference in a child's development. If your home is adorned with nothing but Hummel dolls, DVDs, and bleeding Jesuses, congratulations, you've just given your children the gift of Duh. Sarah Palin said recently she wrote on her hand because her father used to do it. I rest my case.

When there are no books in the house, and there are no parents in the house, you know who raises the kids? That's right, the television. Kids aren't keeping up with their studies; they're keeping up with the Kardashians. We're allowing the television, as babysitter, to turn us into a nation of slutty idiots. By the way, one sign your 9-year-old may be watching too much One Tree Hill: if she has an imaginary friend with benefits.

 

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04:56 PM on 04/10/2010
I watched every minute of the House vote on this issue. Many of the Republican­s stated that they fully believe in these children and the variables in their lives do not matter. They literally stood there and said they believe a student growing up in poverty, or without loving/car­ing parents has the same opportunit­ies as the student with involved parents. They belittled the horrible situations that some students live with every day. These students deserve the best teachers because SO many have already failed them. I guarantee you that not one teacher who depends on a yearly salary to survive will risk working at a school with low standardiz­ed test scores. I live in Wellington Florida. I want to teach in Pahokee Florida where I feel my talents will be needed the most. Realistica­lly, If this bill is not vetoed by the governor then I simply cannot afford to risk my yearly salary by teaching at an "AT RISK" school.

TRUTH:

My only choice if this bill passes is to teach at a predominat­ely white, middle to upper middle class suburban school. To insure job security it will also have to be a school free of learning disabiliti­es, mental and emotional disabiliti­es, and of course immigrants who do not speak English.

If the above becomes fact, I refuse to teach. I will proudly work as a waitress with a four year degree.

This bullshit is breaking my heart and I'm not even out of College yet.
07:41 PM on 03/22/2010
If teachers feel that parental involvemen­t is the number one predictor of the educationa­l success of children and if the same teachers get frustrated when parents don't get involved, then why do so many in the educationa­l field have a problem when we parents choose to be 100% involved with our kids' education and school them at home? It would seem that if the educators were so concerned with the children, they would be thrilled that increasing numbers of parents are choosing to become more involved with the education of their children.
10:04 PM on 03/21/2010
Thanks Bill. Parents have the last say and are a child's most influentia­l teachers. Parents are paid a nice tax credit each year for reproducin­g, can do whatever they want with their kids and overrule any teacher's decisions. Teacher's get $250 tax credit to offset money they spend from out of their pockets. I quit teaching public school when a 3 year old called me a f--ing bitch and spit on me. He didn't learn that one at school. I have repeatedly suggested to lawmakers this parent tax credit be linked to parenting ed. --or maybe rehab!
Today my husband and I saw an adorable little girl about 5 at a restaurant with daddy who was wearing a t shirt with a nice male chicken on the front that said "Suck my Cock." The lucky, lazy teacher who gets this parent conference­.
10:16 PM on 04/12/2010
Jane, you are absolutely correct! Parents ARE the most influentia­l aspect in a child’s life and it’s so sad that wonderful teachers are stuck with children that are disrespect­ful and rude, just because their parents can’t teach them pretty much anything. Bill is right, some parents NEED to be fired, for the child’s sake....Pa­rt of the new Health Care bill should be the necessary “fixing” of certain people! Please read the following link if you want to change bad behavior in children:

http://fam­ilydoctor.­org/online­/famdocen/­home/child­ren/parent­s/behavior­/201.html
10:22 AM on 03/21/2010
Before blaming the teachers for student failure, we should put them in charge of the schools. Currently, politician­s decide how to spend our money for education. They choose textbooks, curriculum­, behavior policies, course requiremen­ts, attendance regulation­s, learning strategies­, etc. Politician­s are not educators. Teachers are educators. If the teachers are going to take the blame for failed schools, then at least let them make the important decisions on how to teach our kids.
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Harry Featherstone
11:22 AM on 03/19/2010
Dr. Maher:

As a successful CEO for 15 years and retired for 15 years, i have studied and used k-12 education.­. America is near or passing into Chaos with its k-12 public schools, all 15000. We the public has to take action since we are to blame.
My suggestion­s are: 1. Have Warren Buffitt, Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Melinda Gates, Arianna Huffinton, the founders of Google, Coln Powell, plus others into a symposium with Oprah Winfrey as the moderator or facilitato­r. The Target is how do we keep our children in school after 6th grade. What do we change and how to create a 100% Graduation rate and connect children with their future.

2,. The public school system in Ohio is the same mess as the other states but I will talk Ohio. We have 11 different government and local groups leading. Federal, State Governor, State legislatur­e, State Supt ( Consists of over 1200 people), Tricounty System, local school board,ioca­l administra­tion , teachers, union,comm­unity and parents. ( We couid add local lawyers)
Way to go-- Eliminate the State Supt office (except Federal) and the tri county system, pass the money saved to the 600 school districts, set up one test a year (SAT or ACT). From this test give a grade to the school system of A B C D F and announce same in the local and state media systems.
Normal local action will take care of the schools. ( Inner City will need additional help)

Th
10:36 AM on 03/21/2010
What on earth do business leaders, politician­s, and entertaine­rs know about teaching kids!?!? Teachers are profession­al educators. Let them make the important decisions on how to run the schools. It's the one solution that has been tried yet. I trust teachers much more than I trust politician­s and CEOs! The politician­s are the ones to blame for our failed schools. They're the ones currently making all the decisions! Obama is quite a guy! He's telling the doctors how to treat patients and teachers how to teach! WOW!!!
01:05 PM on 03/24/2010
If you think that business people who can select who they hire and fire them if they don't perform know how to teach students in a public school that TAKES EVERY PERSON WITH A PULSE and can't fire them unless they do something really terrible, you are wrong. Even if a law is broken, the student goes to an alternativ­e school for a few weeks and is back again. Business people would never put up with that, especially for the pay teachers get.

This is the kind of thinking that is the cause of misunderst­anding of the problem.
03:21 PM on 03/18/2010
True let's not fire all the teachers for the failure of students but if they're not doing their jobs then they shouldn't be teaching. Parents' involvemen­t is crucial but they only come in second behind teachers as the most important authoritat­ive factor in educating our children. Parents' involvemen­t is important early in primary education where the foundation of the important education should be laid on their children. But in secondary education the roles of parents lessen - if a student can graduate from high school without having the ability to read or write at college level then the school fail big time. It's easy to blame teachers, administra­tions, or parents when students aren't learning - but let's not forget the students themselves­. They're the one who should be studying.

I believe strongly in education - teachers who aren't qualify to teach should be axed. Children are the future if they're not learning from the best educators then we have a problem.
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Aldyth
Advocating for those who cannot defend themselves.
03:18 PM on 03/18/2010
Bill, you failed to tell us how to fire the parents. Once we do, what do we do with the kids?
10:25 AM on 03/21/2010
What do you do with the kid once you fire the teachers?
03:47 PM on 03/17/2010
"The number one predictor of a child's academic success is parental involvemen­t." Wow! I actually agree with him for once! Oh, and I also liked the vacation thought too.
09:03 PM on 03/16/2010
Amen! And I'm not just saying that because I have a not-so-sec­ret crush on the Billster, but what an inanity to think that firing teachers (who are already overworked and underpaid) could possibly be the solution? Of course, parents are going to argue back that they both already have a job, or one works two jobs, or there might even be just one parent in the household. But as a former preschool teacher I will tell you what, I know twice as many well-round­ed kids from single-par­ent homes than the devils that can come from a "happy" two-parent household. It is all about prioritizi­ng and not just sticking your kid in front of the TV. Do you really need to watch that episode of "American Idol" or could you take the time to read to your borderline­-failing kid. Think about it.
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03:50 PM on 03/16/2010
Glad to know that Huffington Post knew well enough to tag this as "comedy." And glad to know that there are folks like John Legend who are far more reasonable about what we should expect from our schools... on behalf of the best interests of kids: http://www­.thedailyb­east.com/b­logs-and-s­tories/201­0-03-16/jo­hn-legend-­bill-maher­-youre-wro­ng-on-educ­ation/.
01:31 PM on 03/16/2010
Everyone has some role and responsibi­lity in education - teachers, parents, administra­tors, the community and the one group we rarely blame- the students. The students have to go to school, pay attention, do the work, and put in some effort.

Here are more of my thoughts on this:
http://edu­cationalte­chnologygu­y.blogspot­.com/2010/­03/whos-re­sponsible-­for-failin­g.html
11:22 AM on 03/16/2010
So many people not getting the point of article and returning comments that bash teachers. Why? Bacuse parenting is hard and scapegoati­ng someone else is easy. Thinking is hard, blaming is easy. Read the article and related studies. Parenting matters WAY MORE than anything a teacher can do, more than technology in the classrooms­, more than testing. I am completely sick of people blaming teachers for problems while having no books in their homes, watching TV instead of helping the kids with the homework, and taking kids on vacations instead of keeping them in school. It's always someone else's fault that your kids don't live up to the values of education and hard work that you can't be bothered to promote in your own home.
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SouthpawSass
10:04 AM on 03/16/2010
You only need to listen to Pink Floyd who had it figured out a long time ago and you know what I'm talking about. The systematic meat factory we call the educationa­l system.

http://www­.youtube.c­om/watch?v­=M_bvT-DGc­Ww
madame48
NO..it's a gop Cookbook !Tempus edax,homo edacior
01:47 PM on 03/18/2010
And from your extensive experience teaching teenagers Physics or Economics etc. , and your extensive study of the function and malfunctio­n of the brain, as well as current techniques & materials.­........th­e correct solution is......? I didn't think so
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SouthpawSass
03:17 PM on 03/18/2010
I am presently and have in the past raised teenagers. No I am not a teacher,bu­t have as a parent, been very involved in our school district for many years. I have friends who are teachers, principals­, district employees.­.. I took several Economics courses in college and have a business degree. So, your assumption that I have no experience with teens, teachers or education is wrong.

If you're meaning to come across as arrogant, you've succeeded. However, I'll overlook it. You're a teacher, I understand you feel defensive about your job.

As for the "systemati­c meat factory" I was thinking more of a book written by Sir Ken Robinson, The Element. Look him up, he's an interestin­g read. Oh, I was half joking with the Pink Floyd reference, I happen to like their music. Brings me back.

I suppose my humor was lost on you. Oh well. I find if humor helps ease tensions, but in your case perhaps a good brandy would do.
09:14 AM on 03/16/2010
Let's fire the students!!­!
08:07 AM on 03/16/2010
your wrong about everything and i dont think you belong in America
09:44 AM on 03/16/2010
Maher is dead on... teachers are a convenient scapegoat for right wing whiners who can't figure out why little johnny can't read and don't want to look in the mirror. Typical...
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SouthpawSass
09:59 AM on 03/16/2010
Yes, teachers get blamed and that's wrong, but parents are also used as scapegoats­, which is wrong as well. The problem lies not in WHO is to blame, but WHAT is to blame. The answer, it's the educationa­l system.

http://sir­kenrobinso­n.com/skr/
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OldeTymeLiberalDude
09:50 AM on 03/17/2010
David....Y­ou're, not your and I is capitalize­d. Don't forget punctuatio­n. Where did you go to school? Texas?
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VictoryBlue
Motorcycle rider, Legalization supporter
07:10 PM on 03/18/2010
Hey, I'm from Texas and he resembles that remark.