As all baseball fans know, the weeks following the end of the World Series are highlighted by the "hardware" season - the bestowing by the Baseball Writers Association of America of individual achievement awards in the American and National Leagues for everything from outstanding fielding by position (the Gold Glove awards), outstanding hitting by position (the Sliver Slugger awards) and outstanding pitchers (the Cy Young Awards), to Rookies of the Year, Managers of the Year and, finally the Most Valuable Players Awards, which were given out this week to the equally deserving Twins catcher Joe Mauer and Cardinals first baseman Albert Pujols. There was also welcome surprises in the Cy Young voting, which went to the Royals' Zack Greinke and the Giants' Tim Lincecum. Neither of them were among their respective leagues' leaders in games won, an old and clearly outdated standard, especially given the fact that these days so few pitchers throw complete games, meaning that virtually every win is dependent on a succession of variably dependent relievers. Yet both were probably the best all-around pitchers during the season. Given how slowly baseball changes its core mindset about most things (lefthanded catchers, anyone?), this is almost a sea change.
Still, there has been one post-season award that has all of major league baseball puzzled - namely, who the hell won Bernie Madoff's Mets jacket?
A little over a week ago, on November 14, under the auspices of the U.S. Marshals Service (call them the Bud Seligs of the law & order game), the Pflugerville Texas firm of Gaston & Sheehan (call them the Hillerich and Bradsby of the bidding circuit) auctioned off a variety of personal items belonging to Hall of Fame crook Bernie Madoff, with the proceeds earmarked for victims of his $65 billion Ponzi scheme. All in all, they raised some $900,000 (or the equivalent of about a week's worth of Alex Rodriguez plate appearances) - $14,500 of which came from the anonymous online bidder who, er, made off with Madoff's personalized blue satin New York Mets jacket, with his last name stitched on the back.
Rumors have been flying as to the identity of the winner, and from what we've been able to glean from our sources, it may well be none other than Mets owner Fred Wilpon himself, who was among the many whom Madoff milked for millions over the years. Supposedly, Wilpon has unique plans for the jacket. At some point this winter, in a private ceremony, the wicked windbreaker will be set ablaze atop a bonfire of old Dave Kingman, Bobby Bonilla and Rey Ordonez bats at home plate in Citi Field, all under the supervision of a rabbi specially trained in the ancient rites of Jewish exorcism. This, it is hoped, will drive the Dybbuk out of the new ballpark - or at least out of Oliver Perez's left arm.
Of course, considering that it was recently revealed that the Mets spent less than all other major league teams this past summer in signing their amateur draft choices, there may well be some truth in the other major rumor hovering over Flushing, Queens. That one says that, due to all the money Wilpon lost because of bad old Bernie, the team is in serious financial trouble - a situation that isn't likely to improve the quality of the rapidly deteriorating on-the-field product being offered to Mets fans, who have a long tradition of viewing their team as always poised to start wandering the baseball desert. Moses, call your office.