The Buddha was the smartest psychologist I've ever read. More than 2,500 years ago he was teaching people about the human mind so that they might understand themselves better and discover that there was a way out of suffering. Buddha wasn't a god or a messiah -- he was simply a very wise teacher with keen insights into human nature. He learned much by meditating and learning from his own experiences, as well as by observing the behavior of others.
Buddha described the human mind as being filled with drunken monkeys, jumping around, screeching, chattering, carrying on endlessly. We all have monkey minds, Buddha said, with dozens of monkeys all clamoring for attention. Fear is an especially loud monkey, sounding the alarm incessantly, pointing out all the things we should be wary of and everything that could go wrong.
Buddha showed his students how to meditate in order to tame the drunken monkeys in their minds. It's useless to fight with the monkeys or to try to banish them from your mind because, as we all know, that which you resist persists. Instead, Buddha said, if you will spend some time each day in quiet meditation -- simply calm your mind by focusing on your breathing or a simple mantra -- you can, over time, tame the monkeys. They will grow more peaceful if you lovingly bring them into submission with a consistent practice of meditation.
I've found that the Buddha was right. Meditation is a wonderful way to quiet the voices of fear, anxiety, worry and other negative emotions.
I've also found that engaging the monkeys in gentle conversation can sometimes calm them down. I'll give you an example: Fear seems to be an especially noisy monkey for people like me who own their own business. As the years go by, Fear Monkey shows up less often, but when he does, he's always very intense. So I take a little time out to talk to him.
"What's the worst that can happen?" I ask him.
"You'll go broke," Fear Monkey replies.
"OK, what will happen if I go broke?" I ask.
"You'll lose your home," the monkey answers.
"OK, will anybody die if I lose my home?"
"Hmmm, no, I guess not."
"Oh, well, it's just a house. I suppose there are other places to live, right?"
"Uh, yes, I guess so."
"OK then, can we live with it if we lose the house?"
"Yes, we can live with it," he concludes.
And that usually does it. By the end of the conversation, Fear Monkey is still there, but he's calmed down. And I can get back to work, running my business and living my life.
Learning to manage your monkey mind is one of the best things you can do to transform fear. Pay attention to how your monkeys act -- listen to them and get to know them, especially the Fear Monkey. Take time to practice simple meditation on a regular basis. Learn how to change the conversations in your head. Practice kind, loving, positive self-talk and see how it can transform your fears.
BJ Gallagher's next book is "BEING BUDDHA AT WORK: 108 Ancient Truths on Change, Stress, Money and Success," coauthored with Franz Metcalf (Berrett-Koehler; pub date Jan. 2012).
Follow BJ Gallagher on Twitter: www.twitter.com/BJ_Gallagher
Also all these things that caused the mind to be like this are emotional things, not logical things. They are things that hurt the person. So the calming that happens when someone does meditation is a side effect of this healing that is going on. So people should not be too concerned with how wild or calm they are while doing meditation. http://bit.ly/9JTjUW In fact what is happening in meditation is similar to what a great therapist is trying to do with a person being counseled.
but there is a saying that it is easier to conquer a nation then to conquer your mind. unless you try it you will never understand that statement.
I have had some interesting experiences while meditating. once I realized I was no longer breathing or felt a need to breath. I thought I had passed and there was no fear just some thoughts and concerns about my friend as she would find me in that state and it would scare her to see me like that. no concern for myself. I have no idea how long this went on as time was not an issue.
a couple of times I entered a state of some kind of emptiness as there were no thoughts at all. cant explain it but just no thoughts flowing. the rest of that day I was in this wonderful mood. in fact that night going to a spiritual study group the leader stated what happen to you as you have that wonderful smile on your face.
meditation is one of the great aspects available to anyone for viewing our consciousness and awareness. while living with some hindu monks we use to meditate 6 hours at a time and this fly kept landing on my nose. if you ever experience that one sometimes then see how that "monkey mind" reacts. :-)
And I'm betting the mods will not let this through. Completely disagreeing with any articles Buddhist-derived seems to be heresy on this site.
We aim, in meditation, to shut up those past and future worries and focus on this moment in time. We practice so that we DON'T end up homeless because we got overwhelmed. We work to get to a place where we have clarity of mind which can be applied to life's everyday problems. I may lose my home and end up homeless, but with clarity of mind, I can see all the options I might have to get myself OUT of the situation instead of being so overwhelmed with it that I get frozen in place. That's the whole reason to practice. It's the whole reason to get the monkey mind under control.
cosign.
What she's saying is that fear of homelessness will get you nowhere.
Well said. It's taken 2,500 years for modern psychology to finally catch up.
The metaphor of the Monkey Mind is an excellent one also. Just last night, my wife and I were in the San Gabriel Mountains in the early evening, watching the stars appear in the sky and enjoying the warm, quiet evening. We heard the roar of a car approach and soon someone shot by going 90 mph on Angeles Crest Highway.
I turned to my wife and said, "There goes another Monkey Mind."
When I first started reading Buddha's teachings about 12 years ago I was amazed and delighted to discover how insightful he was. He helped me understand myself – and other people – more than any psychologist or psychiatrist or philosopher I ever read! I, too, am happy to see more and more people benefitting from Buddha's insights into human nature. He was a wise doctor, indeed, and he wrote some good prescriptions to help us alleviate our own suffering, too. I'm grateful.
Feed it a banana.
1) Take a deep breath and let it out slowly. noticing any tight or tense places in your body. Relax them by breathing into them and feel them relax.
2) Let your breathing return to normal. Focus on your nostrils and feel the air going in and out of your body. Don't try to force the breath. Let it simply be as it is.
3) Continue to focus on the nostrils and begin to count breaths. Each in and out breath counts as 1. Again, don't force the breath in any way. Count from 1 to 10. When your mind strays, bring it back gently and say to yourself "thinking". Let that go and return to counting.
4) Count through 3 cycles or as many as you want. Feel how the air goes into the lungs. Feel how it is different when it leaves the body from how it is when it enters.
5) When you have finished 3 cycles or when you are ready, slowly let go and open your eyes. Feel how calm has relaxed your body and how your mind is quieter.
Try this and see if it helps you at all. My autistic son uses this method and it helps him. He also has OCD. It takes very little time, and it allows you to step out of whatever is going on and come back to yourself. Good Luck.
Lucky Balaraman
Inner Peace Coach
http://CalmAndCool.com
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You can shut the mouth of the bear and the tiger;
You can ride a lion;
You can play with the cobra;
By alchemy you can eke out your livelihood;
You can wander through the universe incognito;
You can make vassals of the gods;
You can be ever youthful;
You can walk on water and live in fire;
But control of the mind is better and more difficult.
I also like what Sir Edmund Hillary said: "It is not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves."