Once upon a time
The Cat in the Hat
George Bush and I
Had a big spat.
One summer day,
Just after three
My mother said,
"I'm going for tea."
She went out the door
And in two seconds flat
Out of the closet
Came the Cat in the Hat.
"It's time to have fun,"
Said the Cat in the Hat
"Let's watch TV,
Nothing's better than that."
He went to our den
And without saying please
Turned on the FOX news
Which quivered my knees.
"I always watch this,"
Said the Cat with a grin.
"They take all the news
And then give it a spin."
Bill O'Reilly was on
And he made me cry
"Stop sniveling," said Cat,
"Want a poke in the eye?"
I cowered in fear
And covered my tush
When onto FOX news
Came our President Bush.
"I love him," said Cat
"He's simply the best
He's stalwart and brave
He passes each test."
I shouldn't have argued
I'm only a kid
But I had to point out
The bad things Bush did.
"What about Iraq?
He lied and deceived
Distorted the facts
Fudged what we believed."
"Tut tut," said the Cat
"Surely you jest
We must sacrifice
Be put to the test."
Then Bush gave a speech
The crowd began cheering
He said that the war's
End was now nearing.
"The going is tough
And we'll surely win
I just can't say how
Nor do I know when."
"Hmm," said the Cat,
"Iraq seems a mess.
But Dubya's my hero
He'll be a success."
Before I could think
The words tumbled out,
"You imbecile Cat
You're never in doubt.
"Don't you remember Al Qaida?
Osama and crew?
We haven't caught many
In fact very few.
"Our security's a joke
Our friends have departed
'Cause of President Bush
And this war that he started."
"If you are so smart,"
Said the Cat in the Hat,
"Then talk to George Bush
What's the matter with that?"
So the Cat in the Hat
Reached in our TV
Grabbed Georgie Bush
Set him down facing me.
"We're winning the war,"
Said Commander-in-Chief
"Yes, Iraq is hard work
But well worth all this grief."
I couldn't believe it
He wore a big grin
As if Bush enjoyed
This mess we are in.
"Hard work if you don't
Know what you're doin'
George, you and your gang
Will lead us to ruin."
Then Dubya got angry
And made a bad sound
He shouted and bellowed
And stomped on the ground.
"I don't have to listen
To peons like you
I'm Decider-in-Chief
I like what I do."
Then Bush took a leap
Back in our TV
He hugged Bill O'Reilly
They giggled with glee.
"We're looting America
And having such fun
Too bad 'bout your future
But we've just begun."
I jumped from the couch
Turned off the TV
"George is real bad,
"Just as bad as can be."
Cat nodded his head
"He's no fun all,"
And he turned and ran,
Cross the room, down the hall.
Then Mother came in
With a swish of her skirt
"I see you were good
Not covered with dirt."
I said not a word
About the Cat in the Hat
Or my visit with Bush
She doesn't know that.
Yet sometimes I ponder
George Bush and his flock
What does Dubya think
About solving Iraq?
Maybe he just sits
There, as simple as that
He waits for an answer
From the Cat in the Hat.
Our 2024 Coverage Needs You
It's Another Trump-Biden Showdown — And We Need Your Help
The Future Of Democracy Is At Stake
Our 2024 Coverage Needs You
Your Loyalty Means The World To Us
As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.
Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our news free for all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
The 2024 election is heating up, and women's rights, health care, voting rights, and the very future of democracy are all at stake. Donald Trump will face Joe Biden in the most consequential vote of our time. And HuffPost will be there, covering every twist and turn. America's future hangs in the balance. Would you consider contributing to support our journalism and keep it free for all during this critical season?
HuffPost believes news should be accessible to everyone, regardless of their ability to pay for it. We rely on readers like you to help fund our work. Any contribution you can make — even as little as $2 — goes directly toward supporting the impactful journalism that we will continue to produce this year. Thank you for being part of our story.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
It's official: Donald Trump will face Joe Biden this fall in the presidential election. As we face the most consequential presidential election of our time, HuffPost is committed to bringing you up-to-date, accurate news about the 2024 race. While other outlets have retreated behind paywalls, you can trust our news will stay free.
But we can't do it without your help. Reader funding is one of the key ways we support our newsroom. Would you consider making a donation to help fund our news during this critical time? Your contributions are vital to supporting a free press.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our journalism free and accessible to all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.
Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our news free for all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. Would you consider becoming a regular HuffPost contributor?
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. If circumstances have changed since you last contributed, we hope you'll consider contributing to HuffPost once more.
Support HuffPostAlready contributed? Log in to hide these messages.