After Steve Colbert, Try My New Ice Cream

You might have heard that Ben and Jerry's has begun a new Steve Colbert ice cream flavor. Which gave me the idea for the new ice cream company I am announcing today.

So many others have profiteered from this war, why not me?

Our landmark flavor will be Dixie Chicks Vanilla. Pure and tasty, the perfect flavor for the discerning man or woman who likes truth with a bite.

For those of a different persuasion, try the Dick Cheney pistachio nut. No explanation needed.

Since the major media needs a flavor all its own, check the Bob Woodward Neopolitan. When Bush is up, Bob goes Vanilla. When Bush is down, he turns chocolate. Now Bob is working on his next Bush book, so to hedge his bets, it's strawberry. But that could change.

I expect a big seller to be the Richard Perle flavor. Unfortunately, I cant tell you what it is. That is secret. Also, it costs ten dollars a pint. Darn Richard. He always goes for the big royalties.

For the active Democrat, try the Hillary Butter Pecan. Truth is, it tastes awful, but Hillary told me to make this clear: it's not her fault!

Angry Republicans will savor the flavor of my McCain Falwell Delight. Consider yourself warned: if you dont buy it, John will accuse you of not supporting the troops.

For devotees of Edward R. Murrow, the Katie Couric Vanilla Lite is your choice. It has no taste at all, but it looks nice and wont make you fat. This treat has legs!

One of our best sellers will be the Ann Coulter Rainbow. The perfect choice for the woman who wants to go home early during a bad date. It's poisoned, but look at the bright side. You can tell him you have a headache.

Finally for our summer season, dont miss the Joe Lieberman Sorbet. The container is blue, but the bad taste is red.