To Cable News: I Am the Father of Anna Nicole Smith's Child!

In the meantime, interested parties might read the, which discusses the advanced preparations for Bush to order a preemptive first strike attack against Iran.
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Tucker, Lou, Bill, the father of Anna's child
was not the lawyer, the boyfriend or the Prince.
It was me.

I will soon tell the entire story, once I have
concluded negotiations for my book deal
and the movie rights.

You have my word. It is a tale of romance,
passion and intrigue that will provide front
page news around the world.

I will be available for interviews starting Monday
afternoon. The Today Show has booked me
for their early segment, and once we set a time
for Good Morning America, my agent will turn
to the cables.

I will also be announcing that I have decided
to enter the New Hampshire Democratic primary and will participate in
the February debate. At that time I will announce my running mate, who
will be an articulate man, who was not educated at a madrassa and does
not have
big ears.

Can't say who; Maureen has been promised the
exclusive.

In the meantime, interested parties might read
the Guardian, which discusses the advanced
preparations for George W. Bush to order a
preemptive first strike attack against Iran.

It's not as exciting as the Anna Nicole Smith
story, but might be worth a quick read. Chou.

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