THE BLOG

20 Reasons Why I Don't Like Your Instagram Post

02/03/2015 01:46 pm ET | Updated Apr 05, 2015
scyther5 via Getty Images

1. I don't like it because you don't follow me back.

2. I don't like it because you don't like my posts.

3. I don't like it because it doesn't have 11 likes yet.

4. I don't like it because I don't want you to know that I'm creeping on your shit at 4 a.m.

5. I don't like it because I don't want you to know that I'm spending my Friday night on Instagram.

6. I don't like it because your humble brag isn't humble.

7. I don't like it because your post is 100-percent self-serving.

8. I don't like it because I'm jealous of your body.

9. I don't like it because bae wouldn't like it if I did.

10. I don't like it because it's a happy birthday post for someone I don't know.

11. I don't like it because I follow too many NYC food blogs to even notice it.

12. I don't like it because I'm driving and that's how people get killed.

13. I don't like it because I can't double tap the screen without putting down my pizza.

14. I don't like it because we slept together a few weeks back. Better to lay low for now.

15. I don't like it because I liked your last 3 posts and now I've got to play hard to get.

16. I don't like it because you employed enough hashtags to smother a small Grizzly bear.

17. I don't like it because other people on Instagram can see what I like, which is just weird.

18. I don't like it because it's an all-too-familiar post about you "officially" accomplishing something.

19. I don't like it because it's too personal for social media.

20. I don't like it, but I comment on it because liking is no way to communicate.