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When will the women of this nation stop accepting "guilt gifts" from the men in their lives who act abusively?

When will we say "enough is enough" and turn a deaf ear to half-hearted, mealy-mouthed apologies that provide poor salve for hateful and hurtful actions and words?

When will we finally deliver the tough love and consequences for improper behavior?

I'm posing these questions in large measure because October is National Domestic Violence Month. Yet, more specifically, I want to shed light on the ugly abuse women have been experiencing in the political arena this election season as well as election cycles past.

Certainly, it is shamefully obvious that Jerry Brown and his campaign have a real contempt and lack of respect for women. Come on Jerry -- "whore?"

Of course when questioned about the use of the sexually derogatory term to refer to Meg Whitman, his Republican opponent in the California race for Governor, Mr. Moonbeam dismissed the slur as simply "salty language"before backing into an insincere apology.

Yet, more disturbing than the slur is the fact that the leaders of the California chapter of the National Organization of Women still insist on endorsing a man who refers to an intellectual giant, one of the leading entrepreneurs of the 21st century, a renowned and respected women, as a "whore."

In stereotypical June Cleaver fashion, the women of California NOW put the needs of others before self interest. They allowed loyalty to "the Party", in this case the Democrats, to trump their womanhood.

Every women's organizations, and for that matter, every men's organization, should have ZERO tolerance for sexism and anti-woman rhetoric. Slurs and slanders against any woman should mean the automatic cancellation and revocation of All endorsements.

Unfortunately, the disrespect for women and our issues doesn't begin and end with Jerry Brown. And ironically this dismissive attitude toward women seems most acute in the party most beholden to female voters -- Democrats.

Historically, for Democrats, women have been a dependable and constant constituency and this election cycle is no different. Recent polls conclude that 52 percent of women will vote Democrat and 40 percent Republican in the midterms. That is why in this final stretch to the election the President has taken to the campaign trail to urgently woo as many women as possible in a last ditch effort to halt a potential GOP onslaught.

Yet, it is hard to understand our loyalty when the Democrats have shown a lack of support for us and our issues.

Even the staunchest Democrats don't believe the Party is doing enough, nor has it done enough to promote women into public office, ensure equal opportunities for women, or ensure federal contracts are awarded to women.

It is more than a bit disingenuous, if not downright insulting, to have Democratic leaders come begging in the 11th hour for women to turn out and vote.

You want us to "hold our cute little button noses" and vote the Democratic ticket when the party has all but abandoned many of its female candidates?

According to Politico, Democratic women are in danger of losing electoral ground in the midterm. This reversal of female fortune is due in large measure to the fact that the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee has decided to cut or dramatically reduce funding to at least 16 percent, (nine of its 56) female House members. Admittedly, the Democrats have pulled funding from a number of male House members as well, but the DCCC "defunding ratio" is approximately 3 women for every man.

Democratic women can't help but feel somewhat betrayed by the party.

If the Democrats want women to turn out and vote, they need to make some extra efforts to address our needs. Here are ten concrete and measurable steps the DNC can and should immediately take to win women back:

  1. Set an annual goal of the exact number of women in the House and Senate each year, and provide funding in a manner that will achieve those goals. Publically announce targets and whether they were reached. For example, 20008 women comprised 17% of the US Congress, in 2010 our goal is for women to comprise 20%, 2012, 24% etc.
  2. Publically set up a "bench" for a woman or several women to run for the presidency in 2016.
  3. Require each and every federal department to publish the number of women in senior leadership and go on record with a set of future goals for female leadership.
  4. Develop a party platform that recognizes that women's rights are defined by power, access, and money rather than just bodily functions such as birth control and abortion.
  5. Fight for the enforcement of government contract laws to ensure the full participation of women-owned firms.
  6. Advance and enforce legislation that requires contractors to hire female subcontractors for goods and services.
  7. Speak out forcefully whenever a female political candidate is demeaned or belittled by virtue of some bodily function or appearance. Call out the offenders and publicly state, from the top down, that this type of behavior is unacceptable and Out of Bounds. The silence has been deafening for too many decades.
  8. Require every Democratic candidate to sign a pledge that they will NOT attack an opponent on the grounds of sexual identity, bodily functions, nor appearances.
  9. Require all Democratic candidates to publicize on their websites the percentage of women on their staffs and the percentage of women in the highest paying positions.
  10. Introduce and pass a law to require publicly traded companies to have target of 30- 50% female board members.


Before you become too comfortable, you Republicans get no pass on this issue -- not when men make up 83 percent of Congress.

These ten action items are already being implemented by fellow world leaders. As it stands now 89 other countries boast a higher percentage of female representation in government than the United States. That's unacceptable. It is imperative that both parties commit to embracing legislation to close America's glaring gender gap.

Countries as wide ranging as France and India have laws on their books require significant female participation in their governments (40 percent in France and 30 percent in India).

Our neighbor to the north, Canada, has taken the female participation mandate into its corporate board rooms through its Employment Equity Act. And while the legislation doesn't set quotas, but instead establishes policies to encourage the hiring of women, it has resulted in women holding nearly 30 percent of the jobs in the country's largest federal and provincial Crown corporations.

Yes, Democrats we hear your pleas. We know you need us to help stem the rising GOP tide. However, the question is -- Will we women heed your call?

It's not enough to turn a blind eye to our needs. It's not enough to airdrop a study 10 days before the election. Please don't insult us by noticing us only when it comes time to "turn out and vote."

And if, by chance, we Democratic and independent women help you keep the House and Senate, know this -- we are disillusioned at best, and disgusted or disaffected at worst with the Democratic Party. Apologies for poor behavior and inaction just won't do. There are consequences.

 
 
 
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05:17 PM on 12/12/2010
I dint think women are doing something to men in return for all these chivalry acts. chivalry must die. I think men are growing (atleast me) sick and tired of opening doors and other chivalry acts and still be bitched on my back, barked upon by all feminists even for issues which barely got something to do with strength/whatever of women. I think feminism got into a whole wrong way. There is no point in supporting chivalry.
10:37 AM on 10/31/2010
“Reports from the WHO (Archer, 2006) also make it clear than in many countries around the world, particularly where women have little political or socioeconomic power, women represent the much larger share of IPV victims. However, the most reliable population of surveys indicate that in Western industrialized democracies such as the United States and Canada, where they enjoy higher status, women engage in physical aggression at rates comparable to men (Archer, 2000; Fiebert, 2004; Straus&Gelles, 1990) and are as likely or more likely to be the initiators (DeMaris, 1992;Morse, 1995;Dutton et al, 1999;Straus, 1993;Williams & Frieze, 2005).”

“Shernock’s (2005) analysis of over 2000 IPV incidents in Vermont revealed that men were categorized as perpetrators 3.2 times more often than women on the initial police report, but subsequently arrested 9 times as often. At issue is the extent to which this pattern of gender bias reflects flawed “dominant aggressor” guidelines and assumptions about IPV based on discredited sociopolitical theories of patriarchy”

“Victimized males do not have access to services because of the assumption that they are only minimally impacted by IPV, if at all. This assumption, however, runs contrary to an overwhelming body of research evidence. A significant minority of IPV-related physical injuries, between 25% and 43%, are incurred by men (Archer, 2000; Laroch, in preparation; Mirrlees-Black, 1999; Straus, 2004; Tjaden & Thoennes, 2000), and men are the victims in nearly a quarter of intimate homicides (Rennison, 2003)”

http://www.nfvlrc.org/docs/NFVLRC_2_.Policy.statement.pdf
01:14 PM on 11/03/2010
There you go again....confusing facts with a political narrative. I think the country just told Ms Turner what she can do with her list.
09:41 AM on 10/31/2010
98% of military dead are men...It will take 4,900 years for women to achieve parity for 100 years if no men die in combat for that time.
95% of workplace dead are men..It will take 4,500 years for women to achieve parity for 100 years if no men die in the workplace for that time.
Men die 7 years earlier than women from stress and hard labor...If every woman dropped dead today that would make up for a mere 10 years of early death from men.
There are 10 womens health centers in the federal guv, there are 0 for men.
Title IX, Affirmative Action, ect., the list is endless, give women privelege and entitlements over men in school, sports, earnings and job placement.
80% of suicides and 85% of homeless are men, Government help is offered only to women.
If a divorced man who owes child support loses his job and can't affors to pay the Bradley Ammendment states there is NO excuse not to pay, he will be jailed for the crime of being poor.
For any crime a woman recieves less than 1/2 the sentence of a man.

All this and countless more female privelege yet men are oppressor's. If nothing else, american men will go down as the worst oppressors ever in the history books of the future.
03:19 PM on 10/30/2010
Spoken like a true radical feminist. First of all, considering men have a higher unemployment rate then women, what happens if these affirmative action programs are implemented? The male unemployment rate would sky rocket. Please tell me how a generation of out of work men benefits society or women. Like most feminists, you want affirmative action programs to increase the percentage of women in male dominated fields, yet you systematically ignore professions which are female dominated (teaching). If publicly traded companies are forced to have 30- 50% female board members, what about companies where more than 50% of board members are female? Would your supposed equity program require more men? Yes, October is domestic violence awareness month. Any thoughts about men who are assaulted by their wives? What about women who are emotionally and verbally abusive? Your attempt at social engineering reeks of Marxism and is ultimately flawed. Do your self a favor, throw out your Andrea Dworkin books and move into the real world.
11:12 PM on 10/25/2010
This is not a contest between Democrats and Republicans... This is a quest for the Dems (or failing that the R's) to create the best society for men and WOMEN. We cannot judge the Dems against the Rs. Mediocre vs. mediocre is unaccpetable. How about comparing the current status of women to the status of women in Rwanda (48% of legislature), Cuba, (women are 38%legislature), Sweden etc.

These numbers were not achieved through quotas. Targets are goals. Goals to achieve with the best qualified candidates. With women comprising more the 50% of university students in US surely there are a few qualified female candidates for Boards, legislatures, upper management etc.
09:46 PM on 10/25/2010
I sent this article to all of the women I know....this says it better than anyone else could. We have to start demanding better treatment if we want this nonsense to stop. We have to obtain the power, money and position by helping each other, NOW!
Caren is a fabulous writer and thinker. She gets it. Now it is time for us to step up to the plate too!
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
lil
07:38 PM on 10/25/2010
All this while Republican women soar. Most of them (republicans) want us barefoot and pregnant again; that's the problem, that's the alternative party.
11:59 AM on 10/25/2010
Ms. Turner..... my hat is off to you. My alliterative juices normally start flowing along with my evening cocktail(s). However, your pious, pompous, paranoid, presumptive, and proscriptive post got me going early today.

Try some different vantage points once in a while. The "angry feminist" angle is but one way to examine an issue.
08:07 PM on 10/24/2010
Right on the money. It is important for our democracy to have as many voices involved in our political process as possible, women, minorities, young and old.
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AZreb
equal-opportunity Independent heathen
09:34 AM on 10/24/2010
Noted in many posts to articles regarding some women in politics, notably Pelosi and Brewer, were attacks on their looks rather than their political agendas. Frankly, I don't care what a candidate looks like, I want to see their record, their platform, their voting history. But these "looks" attacks come from bith sides - R and D - and seem to have sometimes more influence than the facts about a candidate.

Too bad when appearance means more than actual candidate performance. Hopefully most women will take no notice of the "looks" but will do their own homework on the candidates and incumbents and make logical, factual decisions.
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noaxe397
04:34 AM on 10/24/2010
The GOP doesn't have to worry about funding their female candidiates. Some of them have more money to spend than the RNC.

What will be said about their business savvy when they spend their millions and walk away with nothing?

The Republican says "It's their money to do with as they please."

The Democrat says "Thank heavens that spend thrift is not in charge of spending MY tax dollars.
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noaxe397
04:25 AM on 10/24/2010
Female candidiates for office have an advantage when running against male opponents in that the male cannot take off the gloves for fear of appearing too harsh.

I am not speaking of stupid comments about appearenece or family status; strictly policy issues.

Imagine if Joe Biden really tore into Sarah Palin in the 2008 VP debate. It would have looked like bullying and Biden would not be respected for his superior knowledge and experience, but because he was harsh and aggressive.

remember when Rick Lazio walked across the stage to get Hillary to sign a no new taxes pledge during their senate debate? The race was all Hillary's after that fatal blunder because, again, Lazio was perceived to be physically threateninig Hillary.

If Biden and Lazio were running against Hank and Sam and not Hillary and Sarah, it would be perceived very differently.

Woman play the gender card, too. Like when Sharon Angle tells Harry Reid to "man up."

What should Reid's reply be? Answer? He really has none, unless he wants to appear harsh and aggressive.
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MrMainstreet
political thought from outside the beltway
01:51 PM on 10/23/2010
The Democratic Party has been and is an ardent defender of womens rights and equality.To say otherwise is complete drivel. From pay equality to reproductive rights to issues that impact families like head start and maternity leave Democrats have been the leaders of such proposals. All the women justices on the Supreme Court today were nominated by Democratic Presidents. We have a woman as Secretary of State and a woman as Speaker of the House. These are the top management position that the writer is talking about. The really troubling part of this article is that the leadership in the group The New Agenda wants quotas. A quota system would be demeaning to ALL women. Women everywhere would be subject to ridicule from their peers that the only reason they got the job was do to a quota requirement. I understand things are not exactly as they should be but Democrats by and large are champions of gender equality.
12:39 PM on 10/23/2010
It is acknowledged even by leftward leaning pundits that 60 percent of tea partiers are women and they are not only members but leaders of the movement. Leaders of traditional feminists groups have sided time and again with liberal ideology and left independent or conservative to the wolves. Women disaffected by the traditional feminist groups have found a home in the Tea Party and in the course of two years have become the most potent and interesting force in American politics.

The women candidates running under the Tea Party banner and with R beside their name are the subject of ridicule from the left and there is no outcry from traditional feminists. Women still on the fence who are politically aware certainly must be taking notice by now and I would expect more and more will be swayed to right.
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kimbanyc
LIBERAL NY DEMOCRAT
02:15 PM on 10/23/2010
Except for one flaw in your reasoning, these women with "R" next to their names take exreme anti choice positions, all favor a bended knee approach to their corporate masters that are gleefully driving jobs to other countries, ALL want to continue to lengthen the income and misery gap between rich and poor and among other reasons against them they all show strong r*cist feelings. Gee who wouldn't jump at the chance to follow that path?
04:04 PM on 10/23/2010
No one is going to jump who is so heavily invested in liberal ideology that they are unable to see any rational ideas that do not correspond to their preconcieved notions. Only women with at least some degree of open mindedness to ideas outside their comfort zone are going to be influenced by the new brand of feminism that is emerging. Apparently there are a lot of them.
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realitytrumpsbull
Two 'alves of coconut!
12:35 PM on 10/23/2010
I think that women that own and know how to use firearms don't end up as domestic violence victims. And, since in this country, women can own their own telephone, and have driver's licenses, and friends, and stuff like that, it's never been a worse situation for would-be wife beaters. Wife-beating is a behavior normally associated with 3rd-world countries, where 'government' amounts to some guy with a Kalashnikov. But, we've got em here in the US, too. Got husband-beaters, too, women that are controlling, verbally abusive, physically abusive, so forth, and so on. Once one or the other gets the mental and physical upper hand, the 'fun' begins. Same goes at jobsites, you end up with people being abusive to their employees, coworkers etc. But, at least at a jobsite, you can fire the people responsible. But, what goes on behind closed doors in America, and countless other countries in the world, that's an area where people really have to think, and act, for themselves.
So, if your spouse is abusing you, taking advantage of you, talk to your friends about the situation, and figure out how to change it, and if you can't change it, take that Radical Step, and get the hell out of that bad relationship. Easier said than done, sometimes people prefer the devil they know, to the devil they don't, but the good news is, all you really have to do, is ask for help. And, pack a suitcase.