As a family substance abuse counselor, my clients frequently poise a concern about their loved one's alcoholic intake and whether or not they are really an alcoholic. I hear statements such as "I think my girlfriend is an alcoholic because she drinks almost a bottle of wine while making dinner," or "My husband frequently comes home inebriated, but he swears he can handle it and hasn't been in trouble because of his drinking" or "I really don't think I have a drinking problem just because I've had a DUI."
Specifics and actual questions to determine whether one is or is not in trouble with their drinking can help with the answer.
Though I am not personally in recovery from alcohol or other mind-altering drugs, my own family and friends struggle with the disease. Professionally, I have worked with hundreds of clients with addiction issues and without, and the best litmus test for determining if one is an alcoholic comes from the strong and respectful program of Alcoholics Anonymous and it's 12 simple questions.
The following list is taken word for word from their pamphlet "Is AA for You?" If honestly answered, you can determine your own disposition. If you answer "yes" to four or more of these questions, you may be in trouble with your drinking.
So, what's your score? Remember, four or more and you may wish to strongly consider changing your lifestyle.
I have presented this questionnaire to my clients that are the family members or friends of the prospective alcoholic. It has proven very interesting (and different) as to see how they see their loved ones in connection with alcohol. Often the prospective alcoholic is in denial about their possible addiction issue and may dismiss theses questions as bunk, defend and justify their position with flimsy reasoning or take a combative stance. They can't or don't want to visualize themselves in this position, even though their mate, spouse, parent, sibling or whomever can see these dispositions as clear as day.
One last thought. Just because someone may not meet this criteria does not mean they don't or might not have an issue with alcohol. For some, two glasses of wine can find them blotto, irresponsible and no longer a social drinker. As the family member or friend, don't let the prospective alcoholic say "See, I'm not an alcoholic, I haven't answered "yes" to four of these questions." They may have a different gauge or actions that might make them just as vulnerable to alcoholism as the person whom these concerns fit like a glove.
For the prospective alcoholic that is reading this, be your own honest judge. You know yourself better than anyone. Even if you are not ready to encompass a clean and sober lifestyle, be true to yourself and take the first step in admitting the possibility that you may indeed have the disease of alcoholism. It is nothing to be ashamed of; it can actually be empowering to start taking control of your life. You and your family and friends will be very grateful that one day (hopefully sooner than later) you will seek a healthy, loving relationship with not only yourself, but them as well.
Please do leave a comment below or drop me an email with your thoughts, suggestions or requests for future areas of focus.
If I can be of service to you or your family, please e-mail me at Carole@familyrecoverysolutions.com or visit my website.
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Beer never treats me like a doormat when it's feeling 'less than fresh'.
Beer never does it's very best to create an argument simply because it wants one.
Beer never acts like I should jump through flaming hoops because it has an attractive bottle & label.
Beer never acts like life should be handed to it on a silver platter because it was born with an attractive bottle & label.
Beer never makes demands of me because it has something I need, it only gives of itself and asks nothing in return.
Beer is never insulting.
Beer is never condescending.
Beer never displays out of control anger.
Beer never flirts with other guys when I'm in the room.
Beer is never constantly concerned only with what it wants.
Beer is never self centered.
Beer is never in a constantly bad humor.
Beer never makes totally idiotic decisions with money.
Beer never complains.
Beer is never disrespectful.
Beer never chews with it's mouth open.
Beer never talks with it's mouth full.
Beer never purposely wakes me up when I need sleep.
Beer never talks constantly about nothing when I'm listening to music.
Beer never purposely tries to be irritating.
In short, beer is never a beech.
Two alcoholics were drinking bottles of bud and driving when they saw the blue lights and heard the siren. The driver says ' quick tear off the label and put it on your forehead!" which both drunks then did. As the officer looked into the car he saw the two drunks with bud labels stuck to their foreheads and asked " have you two been drinking?" , the response " No sir, we're on the patch!".
Rehab, a $10000 Big Book.
While operating your automobile have you engaged in navel maneuvers or sunk marine craft?
Do you not remember where you parked your car until you find it in your living room?
Do you find cable TV to be entertaining?
A. I never decided to stop drinking for any period.
A. I lived by myself and interacted with very few people. The few people who tried to tell me what to do were just being rude and nosy.
A. I also drank to get drunk so this question did not apply to me.
A. I had prescription medications to wake me up in the morning.
A. I was confused by people who could drink without getting into trouble.
A. Although I had 5 arrests, I always attributed that to my problem with police, not alcohol.
A. I never had to try to get extra drinks at a party. I always brought enough for myself in case the liquor ran out.
A. I always wanted to get drunk. I also couldn't imagine not drinking.
A. I always managed to post bail in time to make it to work. That's one advantage to working the evening or graveyard shift.
A. I couldn't imagine life without alcohol, so the answer is no.
Although there was no single one event that made me consider getting sober, I believe that when people stopped trying to help me by bailing me out of bad situations. It finally came down to either trying to get sober or going to prison.
1) Do you drink when you don't want to
2) do you get drunk when you didn't intend to
3) Why are you reading this? Normal people don't waste their tme reading polls about alcoholisim
Good luck!
In any case, it is important to note that while the AA questionnaire may indeed lead one to conclude that a change in drinking behavior is appropriate, this does not necessary mean that AA will provide an appropriate or effective approach to changing that behavior.
http://www.mrw.interscience.wiley.com/cochrane/clsysrev/articles/CD005032/frame.html
http://www.behaviortherapy.com/whatworks.htm
Why am I writing this? Because one of my dearest friends for years had an alcohol problem, They tried AA, too religious. Cold turkey, too hard. What made them stop? They made the decision and stuck to it, finally the light dawned. It wasn't easy, but they've been booze free for over twenty years now. I don't say this will work for everyone, my friend had strong motivation,support and determination.
As you can see, there are different ways to a solution. But there is hope for some people. The rate of recidivism of AA'ers by the way is not small, either. If you chose your poison, perhaps it's possible to choose the antidote for your own needs; I don't know. Just throwing this out, maybe it will help someone. Of course, first you have to really want sobriety.
Not everyone who drinks has a problem. And, conversely, not everyone who has a problem drinks. There are numerous reasons why people drink alcohol - some like the taste, some enjoy the feeling and, yes, some want to get drunk. But in today's society, we seem so quick to label everything a possible addiction: alcohol, medication, shopping, sex, gambling, exercise, etc ... Where is the line drawn between people with individual quirks and mindless, conforming automatons?
Since the dawn of recorded human history, people have used various methods (drugs, religion, rituals, intoxicants, sexuality) to transcend the bounds of everyday life. Instead of condemning something that seems to be hardwired into the human psyche, perhaps we should spend more time investigating the "why" instead of constantly harping on the "why not."
Fan #3.
I don't see how having a drinking problem means that one needs a religious program that preaches powerlessness and spiritual healing as the remedy.
If you have a problem with alcohol, please investigate all your options -- they are many responsible, science-based, empowering, free programs out there.
Am I wrong???...this seemed to be more to your point to me?
I need a drink
I need more
You think about another life (yes I think about Eva Greens and how damn good looking she is)