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Finding Happiness

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I recently heard an interview in which Don Henley, the lead singer of the Eagles, stated that all of the Eagles hit songs were written about finding "IT." It being...happiness, love or success. It made me realize that that is what all of us are looking for. We are simply searching for "IT." What many people do not understand is to find "IT" you have to start by looking within yourself.

If you look at the happiest, most successful people out there, you will find that they all have something in common. They have found happiness within themselves. And that, my friends is what I am talking about today. If I have said it once, I have said it a million times. You MUST find happiness within before you can find happiness around you. This may sound like poppycock to you, but it is true.

The most successes that I have had as a matchmaker are the people that have come to me stating, "I have a great life and I am ready to find someone to share my life with." On the opposite end of the spectrum are the people that come to me stating "I want to change this, this, this and this in my life so that I can hopefully find someone to complete me." Do you see the difference? Many people do not. Simply put, a happy relationship doesn't start with finding the right person to love you -- a happy relationship starts with loving yourself.

A good friend of mine said it best when he stated, "The love you feel for someone is only a reflection of the love you feel for yourself." And to this I say, YES! EXACTLY! To find true happiness you cannot simply find someone to complete you, you have to complete yourself first. So many people make the mistake of saying, "my life sucks right now so I am going to get into a relationship to make it better." My advice is that this never works. If you are feeling unhappy alone, bringing someone else into your unhappiness is not going to fix the problem. Instead, change the things in your life that are making you unhappy first! Once you have found happiness in your life, it will be so much easier to find someone else to invite into your life.

We all deserve "IT." We all deserve happiness, love and success. If you do not have these things in your life, give it some thought and ponder, "What can I do to make my life happier?" For many of us, looking at our lives closely and asking ourselves this question is not an easy endeavor. But trust me. You have to do this before you can move on to happiness. Start the journey today by looking into yourself and find what makes you unhappy. Once you have determined what is making you unhappy take actions to fix it. If you need help, seek it. Some people turn to friends or family, some turn to therapy or religion while others may even stop into that fortune teller's shop they pass all the time. Whatever it takes, do it! You deserve it! And if you need me, you can always reach out to me.