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Bob Barr! For President! Bob Barr!

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I think Bob Barr is an excellent candidate for president and we should all give him a serious look, and I'm not just saying that. Okay, yes I am. He's an evil dingbat. But we should certainly encourage our Republican friends to check him out. They might like what they see.

Right now, Bob Barr is angling to be the Libertarian Party candidate. And why shouldn't a party of anti-government paranoids nominate a former prosecutor, congressman and CIA agent? It makes perfect sense to me.

If the Libertarians nominate him, he claims he can deliver seven percent of the vote. This figure comes from a poll conducted by his exploratory committee and sounds reasonably believable only if you accept the premise that seven out of a hundred Americans have heard of Bob Barr.

Maybe they're thinking of Bobby Bare.

Still, wouldn't it be nice? Elections are won and lost on third parties that get seven percent of the other guy's vote. Ralph Nader got less than 3% in 2000, and look how well that turned out.

At the very least, if Bob Barr could get his shit together, he could make John McCain fight for the cranks.

Who speaks for them now? The loners in camo... the ham radio operators... the tax resisters... the silver hoarders and disgruntled former warehouse employees... the people who write threatening letters to women's health clinics, but can't mail them, because they don't recognize the legitimacy of the post office... the flinty-eyed realists, vigilantly steeling themselves for the day when we throw off our Mexican overlords, the Trilateral Commission, the Bureau of Land Management and, I dunno, Katie Couric... STAND BACK, YOU UNICEF SNIPER SQUADS IN YOUR REVERSE-ENGINEERED UFOS! YOU'LL GET MY GUN WHEN YOU PRY IT FROM MY COLD DEAD LOVE LIFE!

You know, values voters.

The Ron Paul moment has passed and his people have got to go somewhere, if only to get some fresh air and little sun.

If Bob Barr could win them, who's vote would John McCain have left?

Okay, Joe Lieberman. But who else?