That feeling of sweet victory when a tourist in Paris asks you for directions because they figured "they must be from around here" is a confidence boost every newcomer will appreciate. Considering the locals can tell a born and bred Parisian from a Frenchman that moved there from elsewhere in France, solely relying on your French language skills to help you fit in is a lost cause. Given France's poor performance -- 59th out of 64 countries -- in the Ease of Settling In Index of the most recent Expat Insider survey, mastering the following mannerisms to help channel your inner Parisian will not go amiss in your pursuit to blend in with the locals:
1. Make good use of "les bises"
Some find the Parisian way of greeting -- one kiss on each cheek -- rather intimate especially when meeting someone for the first time. For the purpose of blending in with the Parisians, it is best to put oneself past this and see it is as a way to break the barriers between new acquaintances and quickly reach a comfortable level of intimacy. Although in professional circles a handshake is probably your safest bet, in social circles, when in doubt, bise. Friends and friends of friends (to whichever degree) are always given the bises. A comforting thought is that the only physical contact during this interaction should be between the cheeks of the participants; lips are only used to make the accompanying kissing sounds.
2. Don't stop to take in the sights
Whether it's the Sacré-Coeur, the Arc de Triomphe, or, dare I say it, the Tour Eiffel, the seasoned Parisian will not take time out of their day to stand still and take in these marvelous landmarks. In this respect the Parisians distinguish themselves from the tourists and newcomers. If you really want to sell it, throw in a couple of clearly audible sighs as you wade your way through the hordes of tourists gawking at the Notre Dame, agilely avoiding selfie-sticks being whipped out left and right.
3. Know your Grandes Écoles
Say you're at a dinner party in Paris attended by expats and locals alike, and your conversation partner tells you they went to ESSEC. How impressed should you be? And what about if they went to Sciences Po? Even though they are numerous, the Grandes Écoles are very selective and are often stepping stones into sought after positions in professional and especially political circles in France. In these situations, a response laced with an appropriate amount of awe will be very much appreciated by the Frenchman you are conversing with. Being privy to the intricacies of attending these schools as well as the doors which a diploma from such an institution opens in France will set you apart from other newcomers.
4. Be concise when expressing yourself
Expressing yourself in another language is always tricky, but fortunately in Paris there is no need to go digging up high school French vocabulary, something which will give you away faster than you can utter "mon dieu" or gasp "sacré bleu". These expressions are très passé. Instead, you can express your full range of emotion (anger, surprise, happiness, devastation, you name it) using just one, all-encompassing word: putain. Warning: don't let its frequent (read: constant) use by the Parisians fool you into thinking this word is appropriate for formal situations.
5. Master the metro etiquette
While the train winds down the underground tunnels, the solitary Parisian traveler stands alone, not even reaching out for the support of a pole. A plus side to this balancing act is that it saves you from worrying about the cleanliness of the object you're using to steady yourself with or, for that matter, that of those who have come in contact with it before you. Generally, the Parisian metro is not a place for social interaction and eye contact is usually avoided. As for when to get up from your seat (if you've managed to secure one) to head to the door, only get up once the train has stopped at your station and the doors open. If you get up any earlier and wait by the door you will betray your inexperience and possible anxiousness about using the Paris metro.
(Image credit: Photo 1 by Moyan Brenn/CC BY 2.0; Photo 2 by Simon Blackley/CC BY-ND 2.0; Photo 3 by Kosala Bandara/CC BY 2.0; Photo 4 by Moyan Brenn/CC BY 2.0; Photo 5 by Vincent Anderlucci/CC BY 2.0; Photo 6 by Pedro Ribeiro Simões/CC BY 2.0)