Comments are closed for this entry
View All
Favorites
Bloggers
Recency  | 
Popularity
Page:  « First  ‹ Previous  1 2 3 4 5  Next ›  Last »  (5 total)
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
12:27 PM on 04/11/2012
LOL I know the shock of being called ma'am. And I'm 63. Somehow 63 just doesn't feel like 63. But, I've found that true happiness lies not in fooling the world into thinking I'm younger than I am (Why? What's the point of that?), but in embracing every wonderful thing about myself. My UN-Botoxed face, my UN-enhanced breasts, my UN-tucked tummy, my glorious head of gray, unruly hair.

I loved being young. I loved the whole life-revolves-around-how-fabulous-I-look silliness. I loved decorating my body with pretty things. It was great fun. But, like the great fun that was Barbi dolls when I was nine, or sock hops when I was fourteen, those are things that lose their luster when we try to drag them into the next phase of life.

The beauty of our fifties and sixties and beyond is that we can finally, finally stop pretending to be someone else, stop trying to please a world that will not be pleased and finally, finally discover our authentic selves. For me, it was the most joyous, most rewarding, most meaningful discovery of my life.

So, call me ma'am if you must. I will take it with the same good grace that I accept a religious person's "Bless you" or "Merry Christmas". I will recognize that the intent behind it comes from respect and good wishes - and I'll be grateful that someone feels me worthy of those.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
count4eternity
Grace greater than all our sin!
12:45 PM on 04/11/2012
thegrrr8est,

Your post was much more thoughtful than the article. Thank you for a good read.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Janenotdoe
truth be known...
02:19 PM on 04/11/2012
count4, I so-ooo agree!

and to the grrrr8test, what you wrote was raw, yet so eloquent... and spot on sang to my 62 years young ♥. thanks much for the day brightener ~ many blessings from jane in VA.
05:16 PM on 04/11/2012
count4eternity, I think thegrrr8est post sends a lovely message & is beautifully written. However, my piece is a self deprecating SATIRE on aging, meant to illicit some laughter, not offense. :-) Perhaps you might reread it with that in mind.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Sue Brookss
02:36 PM on 04/11/2012
Love your post! I'm 61, and you've said exactly what I feel but would have a hard time putting into words.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
count4eternity
Grace greater than all our sin!
12:16 PM on 04/11/2012
Marianne,,

Don't worry. I would never call you ma'am. But if you used the same language in my presence that you used in this article, I would probably look you square in the eye and say "Pardon me! Lady present!"
02:05 PM on 04/11/2012
count4eternity I appreciate your comments, but just a reminder to readers, this is a satirical piece! I'm sorry the language offended you, it's there for comedic emphasis only!
05:19 PM on 04/11/2012
LOL! I promise if our paths cross I will be ladylike and polite!
12:06 PM on 04/11/2012
Witty and enjoyable article. Women are forced to redefine themselves to themselves all through life, no matter how pretty they are. It works best if they just relax and enjoy the ride (but it's hell on the psyche).
photo
Wicked Wendy
Yep, the micro-bio is empty and will stay that way
12:05 PM on 04/11/2012
I was born and lived in the north for 40+ years before moving to the south. When people call me Ma'am I simply thank them for being polite and tell them I prefer to be called by my name. Now, people I meet at work call me Ms. and my name. I'm still not sure which I prefer. Probably Ms because then I'm sure they remember my name.
MarkRB
No Libs, No Cons...Time for We the People
11:47 AM on 04/11/2012
Calling people Ma'am and Sir is a Southern thing. When I moved to CA, people actually got mad at me for saying it. I'm 47 and still call someone I don't know Ma'am or Sir, even if they are younger than me. Get over it.
12:03 PM on 04/11/2012
One can say Ma'am to any female, no matter the age. It is Southern and we look on it as a sign of respect, not age.
12:06 PM on 04/11/2012
I'm born and raised in So. CA...been saying "Sir" and "Ma'am" all my life (60 yrs), never had a bad reaction here.
Maybe the person was surprised that someone had manners and was polite?
11:36 AM on 04/11/2012
My mom always taught me to call my friends' parents Mrs. or Mr. and if I was allowed to call an adult by their first name, it was "Ms. ____". I see it as a sign of respect for someone older than me. I don't see them as my equal, because I'm still a teenager and it's nice to show people respect. And I don't believe that I'm going to have a problem with "Ma'am" when I'm older, either. Respect is being thrown out the window, yeah?
11:33 AM on 04/11/2012
ma'am or young miss is being respectful, like sir. Has absolutely nothing to do with age so there's no reason for any uproar.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
count4eternity
Grace greater than all our sin!
12:27 PM on 04/11/2012
Chpach67,

Since when does a feminist need reason for an uproar?
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Janenotdoe
truth be known...
02:03 PM on 04/11/2012
count, U realize u'r probably treadin' on some on thin ice, right? jus cuz i like u ;)
11:33 AM on 04/11/2012
LOL...I'm 60, in the past year or two the young guys have started holding doors for me and calling me "Sir"...I say (to myself) yer damned right I'm a "Sir"...I've earned it, now step aside!
Thanks, Marianne...you made me smile.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
victorzeller
11:25 AM on 04/11/2012
Marianne, you're still a babe.
11:41 AM on 04/11/2012
I agree...if I had her looks I'd...ok, I'm a guy so that'd just be weird.
11:21 AM on 04/11/2012
I remember the first time I was called ma'am - I was 24 and it was way back when gas stations were full service. Some smooth-skinned 14 year old boy had come out to wait on me and called me ma'am! I tried not to gasp or look horrified, and tried to take it in stride that it had to happen sooner or later but 30 years later, I sure remember it! He was being nice and respectful while I was being mortified! Just this morning, My perspective of plastic surgery has changed with age also! If I could afford it, I'd have a pull here and a tug there - not much, just a little refresher course! I looked in the mirror this morning and my mother looked back at me! There's a shocker for another woman who either says or thinks that she'll never be like her mother - not only are my mannerisms a lot like her (I love big purses because you can put everything in them, I rub my thumb and middle finger together when I'm deep in thought), I sound like her on the phone and now I look like her! God, I miss that woman!
photo
Wicked Wendy
Yep, the micro-bio is empty and will stay that way
12:06 PM on 04/11/2012
I miss mine, too!
11:06 AM on 04/11/2012
Like some cheese with that whine? Sheesh, get over yourself.
12:29 PM on 04/11/2012
Amen to that.
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
turnkey44
Support your local Animal Shelter
10:55 AM on 04/11/2012
Some folks found out that you don't address Senator Boxer as ma'am.
10:47 AM on 04/11/2012
I think some here are taking a lighthearted column too seriously "Ma'am" and "Sir" are intended to be respectful addresses. This may be a regional thing as well; about 12 years ago I moved to the South from New England and quickly noted "sir" and "ma'am" are used much more frequently here than in the Northeast. Children are apparently taught to use these words when addressing adults.

Another interesting form of address here is calling a woman by "Miss" (e.g. "Miss Jennifer") and referring to a man as "Mr. Gary" for example. So much of this is cultural. As for being somehow offensive, when my older daughter visited for the first time (in her mid-20's then), she was quite tickled to be called "ma'am". She said "no one says that back home".
10:44 AM on 04/11/2012
I would rather be called Ma'am by a child than by my first name. Why doesn't a parent correct the child when the child calls an adult by their first name? Where has the respect for older people gone?
10:38 AM on 04/11/2012
It's quite simple. Miss was used for unmarried women and Ma'am if you were married but that's hardly PC these days. Trying to guess if the person you're speaking to is married or not, particularly if you can't see a ring or other symbol to indicate it, is likely to get you in even more trouble.
Miss if you're young and Ma'am if you're older, is what's considered a respectful address.
I'm 50 and don't have a problem with Ma'am but I do raise a brow at being called "Miss".
01:28 PM on 04/11/2012
I agree. I'm sailing towards 50 and have no hang-ups about my age, or aging for that matter. It is what it is. We lose some things, we gain other things-- other things that I happen to value even more. I don't like to be called "Miss" because I don't like being treated like some young, childish girl... I don't like being treated as though I am trying to cling desperately to my youth; I'm more confident and comfortable with myself at my age now than I ever was in my 20s, or 30s. I don't want to pretend I'm still that girl. I'm a full-fledged woman-- through trial by fire, and proud of every laugh line and gray hair I've earned.

Call me ma'am, please; especially if I patronize your business, or if you are a minor. It shows respect, and I've earned that, too.