Huffpost Parents
THE BLOG

Featuring fresh takes and real-time analysis from HuffPost's signature lineup of contributors

Courtney Carter Headshot

I Am the Worst Mom Friend

Posted: Updated:

In a quote by a very famous philosopher, better known as Jay-Z, he claims, "30 Is The New 20."

Well, I guess that's why he's a rapper and not a philosopher because, no, 30 (as much as we want it to be) is not the new 20.

I am 26. I am in that contradiction of an age where you are young enough to go out, but too exhausted to. Or maybe I'm just too exhausted to. Maybe 30 is the new 20, if you don't have a child.

I am a mother of one, who just hit one years old. I study my son as if he's a foreign alien, baffled by his energy as he runs in circles. I am so tempted to ask him for his secret, but he can't talk yet.

Between work and my son, I wonder, can I still maintain my friendships on top of it?

Sadly, in the midst of a demanding work schedule five days a week then coming home to eat dinner with dada (yes, that has officially become my partner's name), feeding dinner to Carter and then attempting to keep my eyes open for Game of Thrones, my friends get lost in the middle. It doesn't help that my iPhone gets taken by my child as soon as I walk through the door.

Hi, my name is Courtney and I am an hours-late-text-message-responder.

As I have to bail or reschedule on a friend yet again, I wonder, 'can a woman really have it all?' On the times I manage to get a phone call in, my son aware that he doesn't have my sole attention freaks and comes over to my ear yelling and crying until I say, "I'll have to call you back."

So, let's be clear, I don't get to text or get to make calls so how am I supposed to maintain my friendships?

I receive a text message... 'I'll have to respond later, its bath time.'

My phone rings... 'I'll have to respond later, don't want to talk and wake Carter.'

Maybe it's just me, maybe I'm doing it wrong I wonder?

If I can't even get a phone call in, how do I even get outside? One of my best friends from childhood and I have been trying to plan a dinner date for weeks since we never get to see each other and live in the same town. Both of us keep having to reschedule due to well, life.

For those moms that have more than one kid, I mean this sincerely, bless you (and please also leave me some tips)! In the invisible competition that moms have with each other, I am losing in the multitasking department. I really need to finish this article but I'm being pulled in yet another direction... but again, I breathe a little bit easier when I remind myself 30 isn't the new 20.