This year's G-8 Summit is set to begin formally on Thursday in Heiligendamm, Germany. President Bush and seven other world leaders are expected to discuss a variety of issues, including global warming. The President's arrival today was clouded by police attacking an ineffectual gang of protesters in clown makeup, as well as tension between the U.S. and Russia over missile defense.
They had to tell President Bush this was a map to Pirate Treasure
But you can read about that stuff somewhere else. We're here to tell you what you really want to know: who are these eight powerful leaders, and are they attractive or gross?
Inappropriate Hottie Rundown: G-8 Summit
Here they are, rated on a scale of 1-4 sweaty polar bears...
This is Stephen Harper, Canada's Prime Minister, visiting troops in Kandahar last month. The Oakleys and camo vest are a perfect counterbalance to the cuddly, soccer Dad physique, which more than makes up for the fact that Canada has nothing to do with anything.
3 out of 4 sweaty polar bears.
Meet José Manuel Barroso, president of the executive body of the European Union. He seems short, but he might have a sense of humor about it.
2.5 out of 4 sweaty polar bears.
Ooh la la, it's France's brand-new president Nicolas Sarkozy, posed in an Existential fashion during some sort of passive-aggressive suicide attempt/vacation. Never has mountaintop ennui looked so dashing. Is he Albert Camus in pinstripes, or a younger Stallone minus the steroids? Who cares? This photo was probably taken by that cheating wife of his.
3.5 out of 4 sweaty polar bears.
JA! The G-8's lone she-leader--feisty coppertop Chancellor Angela Merkel--shatters grim German stereotypes as she hoists her gigantic stein and charmingly dares us to party with her in an environmentally sustainable future! Ein Prosit, Frau M!
3 out of 4 sweaty polar bears.
It's the Italin Prime Minister Romano Prodi. We like the sinister foreign iconography, ultra-mod furniture, and impeccably tailored suit. Is the runway a not-so-subtle homage to the catwalks of Milan, or did he wander into a parallel-universe Fascist version of "America's Next Top Model?" 2.75 out of 4 sweaty polar bears.
The Prime Minister of Japan has a certain appeal, but he really needs to dial down the Asian look.
3 out of 4 sweaty polar bears.
The manic glint in his eye and showgirl-esque knee pivot portend strange things indeed for anyone who gets frisky with British Prime Minister Tony Blair. Cute, but someone should tell him to keep his mouth closed. Teeth aren't supposed to be light brown. Plus, he's about to retire, and you know he'll be hanging around the house all day trying to engage you in conversation about gardening or the lesser works of Southey. Pass.
2 out of 4 sweaty polar bears.
Somewhat attractive. Don't mind the smirking, but the cowboy look has got to go. Also, like Mr. Blair, he needs to learn to keep his mouth shut, not just literally but figuratively.
3 out of 4 sweaty polar bears.
Vladimir Putin looks like the kind of man who will try to strangle you during sex.
4 out of 4 sweaty polar bears.
"G-8 kicks off with talk of missiles, climate" - NPR
"Bush seeks to downplay differences with Putin" - McClatchy