Nap0leon3: giorgio!
Nap0leon3: "yo"
Nap0leon3: "dood"
Kickass43: hey sylvio!
Kickass43: watu doin up?
Kickass43: man wuz gonna call u tmrrow a.m.
Kickass43: say grazie 4 all ur hospitality 2 Mrs. B
Nap0leon3: iz not 2 late 4 me amico
Nap0leon3: "apres ski" parties still goin on
Nap0leon3: 4give me if I boast but...
Nap0leon3: yr missus had fabulous time
Nap0leon3: she wazza de toast of turino
Nap0leon3: & mite I add
Nap0leon3: she has a lvly figure
Kickass43: well like I sed
Kickass43: grazie 4 all dat
Kickass43: we'll catch up soon
Nap0leon3: I think ur lady enjoyed very much de snowboarding...
Kickass43: uh huh
Nap0leon3: & also de luge...
Kickass43: gr8
Nap0leon3: her visit 2 de local hospital...
Nap0leon3: wazza vry well receivd...
Kickass43: k
Kickass43: no offens bud
Kickass43: but its kinda crzy here rite now
Kickass43: mayb we cd chat sum othr time...?
Nap0leon3: ah!
Nap0leon3: 4giv me
Nap0leon3: ur leadr of wrld superpowr!
Nap0leon3: no time 2 "chill" w/ur lttl NATO buds
Kickass43: o man
Kickass43: its not like dat
Kickass43: rlly
Kickass43: APPRESHIATE ur friendship & support...
Nap0leon3: & r troops in iraq...
Kickass43: yes!
Nap0leon3: I donta like 2 complain
Nap0leon3: but my ppl donta like it
Nap0leon3: (diz iraq bizness)
Nap0leon3: of course dey donta understand de affairs offa de wrld...
Kickass43: I kno it
Kickass43: & APPRESHIATE it
Kickass43: jus sayin ive got sum problems at tha mo
Kickass43: * problemos *
Kickass43: VENTE problemos
Kickass43: gotta deal wit em
Nap0leon3: c c
Nap0leon3: I understand
Nap0leon3: although mine r not big...
Nap0leon3: I hav summa my own problemos here atta home
Nap0leon3: bhind in polls...
Nap0leon3: & 3 ladies 2 satisfy on v-day
Nap0leon3: after swearin offa sex till da election
Nap0leon3: april 9!
Nap0leon3: 7.5 mor weeks...
Nap0leon3: datsa 54 days...
Nap0leon3: ...
Nap0leon3: 1296 hours...
Nap0leon3: :-#
Nap0leon3: gd thing I didda not promise 2 win
Nap0leon3: in order 2 resume sex
Nap0leon3: merciful madre of God
Kickass43: I wish mine wuz jus polls
Kickass43: man IF ONLY it wuz polls
Kickass43: I MISS wen it wuz jus polls
Nap0leon3: I red ur unfortunate news
Nap0leon3: so sry
Nap0leon3: actualy dat iz y I'm "IM-ing"
Nap0leon3: itta waz de talk of de party
Nap0leon3: watta dis dood whittington kno?
Kickass43: whittington?
Kickass43: kno?
Nap0leon3: c
Nap0leon3: surely sumthing vry important
Nap0leon3: 4 ur vice-president 2 pop him
Kickass43: dude!
Kickass43: dick didn't POP him
Kickass43: it wuz anACCIDENT
Kickass43: jus a littl casual accident tween buds!!
Nap0leon3: iva misunderstood
Nap0leon3: i thotta he sprayd summa ol man w/bullets
Nap0leon3: & tried 2 cvr it up...
Kickass43: man dats wat tha press is sayin...
Nap0leon3: im so sry 2 hear it
Nap0leon3: inna my country...
Napoleon3: esp sicilia...
Napoleon3: we kno how 2 do a hit
Nap0leon3: w/out de press knowin
Nap0leon3: & r polizia:
Nap0leon3: :-x
Kickass43: not like dat!
Kickass43: wuz no problem wit tha "polizia"
Kickass43: happnd in tx
Kickass43: they were huntin
Kickass43: jus HUNTIN
Kickass43: & like tha ranch owner...
Kickaa43: an ol' family ladyfriend ...
Kickass43: wit ol' family $$...
Kickass43: goes & squeals!
Nap0leon3: dat issa vry bad news
Nap0leon3: & now u musta take dissa lady out also?
Kickass43: repeat: not like dat
Kickass43: evry1's makin such a dam fuss
Kickass43: wuz jus birdshot!
Kickass43: but nooooo
Kickass43: there I am
Kickass43: Sunday aft
Kickass43: jus chillin wit barney
Kickass43: in tha big white crib
Kickass43: watchin USA kick ass @ turin
Kickass43: & wunderin how 2 wrap tha brush saw I got 4 laura 4 v-day
Kickass43: all offa suddn
Kickass43: fone's jumpin
Kickass43: "We've gotta problem Mr. President"
Kickass43: like its apollo 13
Nap0leon3: I did not see dat film
Kickass43: nvr mind
Kickass43: its BAD
Kickass43: & like laura's ovr ther
Kickass43: lunchin w tha pope!!
Kickass43: so much 4 his prayrs
Nap0leon3: benny issa no JP2
Kickass43: veeps callin evry 2 secs
Kickass43: wants 2 kill hisself
Kickass43: man he's gonna hav anudder hrt attak
Napoleon3: hm
Kickass43: y "hm"?
Nap0leon3: so yr man cheney issa man of honor
Kickass43: DUH
Kickass43: u kno dat
Nap0leon3: c c
Nap0leon3: so mayb dis whittington dood insulted him...
Nap0leon3: or prhaps hissa wife??
Kickass43: lissen up silvio
Kickass43: dick didn't do this on purpose
Kickass43: whittington's like a MJR fundraisr
Kickass43: mucho $$$
Kickass43: & he's a tuff ass
Kickass43: he's not tokkin 2 tha press
Kickass43: xcept to say from his IC bed
Kickass43: dat it wuz an honor & privilej 2 be shot by tha veep
Nap0leon3: v impressive
Nap0leon3: still...
Nap0leon3: makes no sense
Nap0leon3: let me try 2 follow:
Nap0leon3: dick pops summa guy...
Kickass43: PLS
Kickass43: NOT "pops"
Nap0leon3: ok
Nap0leon3: so da hit goes rong...
Kickass43: NOT "hit"
Kickass43: a huntin accident
Nap0leon3: ok
Nap0leon3: dis "huntin accident"...
Kickass43: c
Nap0leon3: witta mjr fundraisr...
Kickass43: c
Nap0leon3: who knowsa nothing...
Kickass43: C
Nap0leon3: is leakd 2 de press by a rich lady
Nap0leon3: who goes a waya bak w/de family
Kickass43: u got it
Nap0leon3: she's "hot" dissa lady?
Nap0leon3: a babe?
Kickass43: she's ok
Kickass43: blond chick
Nap0leon3: ha!
Nap0leon3: den dere's issa only 1 conclusion my amico
Kickass43: ?
Nap0leon3: dis wuzza crime of passion!
Kickass43: ??
Nap0leon3: watta other motive cd dis chick have 2 betray ur man dick?
Nap0leon3: y did dick hav 2 shoot de dude whittington?
Nap0leon3: becuzza: dey were in luv w/de same woman!
Nap0leon3: BUT
Nap0leon3: dissa woman did not luv dick
Nap0leon3: SO
Nap0leon3: wen he shot her tru luv whittington
Nap0leon3: she wuzza upset
Nap0leon3: THUS
Nap0leon3: she squealed
Nap0leon3: as u say inna english:
Nap0leon3: "de fat lady hassa begun her cantata"
Kickass43: Dick. Cheney.
Kickass43: hahahahahahahahahahahaha
Nap0leon3: y u laff?
Kickass43: ur jokin rite
Nap0leon3: I don't c "joke"
Kickass43: dude he's like 65...
Nap0leon3: im 69!!
Kickass43: ...& he's gotta mjr hrt condishun...
Nap0leon3: inna luv we all suffr mjr conditions of da hrt...
Kickass43: & tha dude he blows is like 78...
Nap0leon3: perfecto!
Kickass43: bottom line: he's DICK CHENEY
Nap0leon3: trust me
Nap0leon3: dis reeks offa passion
Nap0leon3: ulla c
Kickass43: uh ok
Kickass43: I'll take ur wrd bud
Kickass43: now I got me a brush saw 2 wrap
Nap0leon3: madre of God
Nap0leon3: a brush saw!
Nap0leon3: wat u get urra mistress?
Nap0leon3: a duck blind?!
Nap0leon3: ha ha ha
Kickass43: NOT funny dude
Kickass43: dats wat dick got lynne...
Kickass43 has left the chat.
"The Secret Presidential IMs" appears every Tuesday. Kickass43 will be on holiday next week observing President's Day (gotta chill!).