The 12 Steps: An Antidote For Celebrities And Other Narcissistic Addicts

I'm a big fan of Dr. Drew. As I mention in my book, The 12-Step Buddhist, it was his description of the carbon copy pothead turned meth addict on the popular radio show Loveline, with Adam Carolla that helped convince me that I was in big trouble. I badly needed to return to recovery after relapsing with almost 10 years of "clean time." Dr. Drew's advice then, and now, is unique among medical professionals. He has both good heart and great skill in dealing comprehensively with addiction.

After two seasons of Celebrity Rehab and another of Sober House, VH1 put out a program called VH1 News Presents: Dr. Drew's Celebrity Addiction Special that they claim, "examines the root causes of celebrity addiction, the reasons behind the rise and why Hollywood is one of the toughest places to get clean."

The show discussed not so successful celebrity narcissist addicts such as Amy Winehouse, Steve O, Lindsay Lohan, Heath Ledger, Celebrity Rehab participants Seth "Shifty" Binzer and Mary Carey. On the winning side were Jack Osbourne, Craig Ferguson, Tom Arnold and Robert Downy Jr. who are all currently clean and sober. I consider myself an expert on addiction but I learned a couple of things watching that special which I'd like to explore further here in my first blog for the Huffington Post.

Dr. Drew mentioned a study called "Narcissism and Celebrity," which he published in the Journal of Research in Personality. This was the first study to explore the topic of narcissism in celebrity addicts. His findings were:

"That celebrities are significantly more narcissistic than MBA students and the general population. Contrary to findings in the population at large, in which men are more narcissistic than women, female celebrities were found to be significantly more narcissistic than their male counterparts.

Reality television personalities had the highest overall scores on the NPI (Narcissistic Personality Inventory -- take the test yourself), followed by comedians, actors, and musicians. Further, our analyses fail to show any relationship between NPI scores and years of experience in the entertainment industry, suggesting that celebrities may have narcissistic tendencies prior to entering the industry."

So what is a narcissist? The NPI scores along the following dimensions, called component traits:

• Authority

• Self-sufficiency

• Superiority

• Exhibitionism

• Exploitativeness

• Vanity

• Entitlement

It's important to understand that the results of a test like this can vary depending on factors such as mood, life events, if the test-taker is in crisis. If you score high remember that a test like this is not meant to be taken alone as a definitive measure. And just because someone is a narcissist doesn't mean they're going to be a celebrity or even successful. In fact, it doesn't mean they're even outgoing. Some narcissists are silent, scary types who secretly feel superior to everyone. But it doesn't mean they're going to go postal either. The term is one way among many to describe an aspect of personality. That said, it is interesting to consider.

The term narcissism is defined as excessive love or admiration of oneself or a psychological condition characterized by self-preoccupation, lack of empathy, and unconscious deficits in self-esteem. There is healthy narcissism, such as the belief that one can achieve one's goals in life, the recognition of healthy qualities, and acknowledgment of one's unique set of talents. On the other end of the continuum is Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).

DSM IV-TR Criteria 1

A pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), need for admiration, and lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:

• Has a grandiose sense of self-importance
• Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty or ideal love (megalomania)
• Believes they are "special" and can only be understood by, or should associate with, people (or institutions) who are also "special" or of high status
• Requires excessive admiration
• Has a sense of entitlement
• Is interpersonally exploitative
• Lacks empathy
• Is often envious of others or believes others are envious of him or her
• Shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes

NPD as described above is not in itself sufficient to diagnose and treat individuals in therapy. Some clinicians believe that the DSM-IV itself can be overused and misapplied. They question the validity of using the DSM exclusively and feel that there is no substitute for getting to know a patient to determine the nature of their problem and the best course of action. Others work with an integrated approach, cautiously using the DSM criteria, scales such as the NPI along with personal experience over time on a case-by-case basis.

How does this apply to addiction? In our 12-Step literature, it's said that selfishness and self-centeredness is the root of our problem. Anyone who knows an addict knows how narcissistic we can be. My guess would be that addicts in general would score higher on the NPI than non-addicts. So what's the solution? I disagree with one of the experts on the Dr. Drew special who claims that other therapies are "just as effective as 12-Step." Dr. Drew's expert was I feel somewhat misleading when he made this statement. For that matter, I'd like to see if he could provide some hard empirical data to back up his statement.

I believe that nothing is as effective for cutting through the self-centered, narcissistic ego of the addict as the 12 Step program. As I discuss in the 12-Step Buddhist, however, a comprehensive, multifaceted approach to recovery, which includes individual and group therapy, possibly medication, physical activities, meditation and regular community based service work has been more effective than the 12 Steps alone. At least it has been in my own case and in the cases of those with whom I work to ensure long lasting, spiritual sobriety.

To be clear, we should define effective. In government studies effectiveness is often defined as a reduction in episodes and/or consequences of drinking and other addictive behaviors. In the 12-Step model, we define effectiveness as total abstinence from any mind-altering substances. (No, we don't include coffee. When's the last time somebody was arrested for driving under the influence of Starbuck's?)

In future blogs I will go into some detail as to exactly how the 12 Steps work as an antidote to narcissism, be it in the celebrity or the common addict. I'll provide specific exercises that you can use to put these ideas to the test.

Follow Darren Littlejohn on Twitter: www.twitter.com/12stepbuddhist

Comments

[Danny Schwarzhoff]

The Big Book, by admission of it own co-authors, presents only one possible way to have a spiritual awakening. They admit it is not the ONLY way to have that experience but one that worked for them. The cool thing about the 12 step Program is that when practiced "as-is" it 'saves' - for lack of a better word - the practitioner not only from his own lack of spirituality and agnosticism but it also frees him from dogma, doctrine and human dictum which may be of questionable origin, intent and purpose - such as the kind inherent in all organized religions - even Buddhism.

What the 12 Steps offers is complete freedom even freedom from AA and the Big Book itself through Step 11 through meditation increasing conscious contact with God. Meditation, when abused, becomes device in service to selfish benefit - like relaxation - "holiness" - being "centered" and maintaining superiority over "non-mediators"or "non-spirituals"..

When practiced growth continues and the Steps begin to appear as the Kindergarten set of disciplines they are. Moving from 12 steps to ANY religion is a step backward.Religions are "supposed" to bring us to God - not to more religion. Perhaps it is a lateral movement in which case what is the point? Anything that binds oneself to itself is not freeing and the 12 steps IS freeing because it leads to the beginning of everything there is, God - and that is as far as we can go.

Peace,

Danny S -

[luling]

No Danny. I do not buy it. You have no fact and no logic.
I quit without the 'help' of people like you and Littlejohn.
That is your truth. It is not mine.

[luling]

Danny, pure 12 step rhetoric. I am not buying it.

[friendthegirl]

I am hoping to throw down here with my position on 12-Step addiction treatment without being deleted, please? I do advocate against 12-step programs as public policy. I don’t advocate against 12-Step in general, but against the fact that 12-Step/AA is the unquestioned standard of addiction treatment in this country.

Addiction is such an enormous and devastating problem in our country. You can see evidence of it out your car window on your way to the grocery store every day, people on the sidewalk who have failed 12-step. People who are entirely responsible until they declare themselves powerless… Does that not break your heart?

And AA lobbies, along side the treatment industry, and the liquor industry, to maintain the status quo. It’s a revolving door: DUI, AA, Treatment, Prison, Aftercare (AA), DUI… It’s amazing to me that HP, which seems to have an anti-corporatocracy position, would be such an advocate of AA, which has its fingers in every pie, but no interest in recovery.

[nicholasjh1]

I had a DUI and went to AA, I never had to pay a thing for AA, but I did for the group therapy sessions. Now how is AA exploiting this?

[nicholasjh1]

Also it is true that many people who have DUI's and go to AA have no recovery, but from my experience there it was because they went only because they were mandated. They had no real interest in recovery, believe themselves to be under control, or simply 'unlucky' with the DUI. So in that sense you have a point, but I also had to go to mandated group therapy sessions, and the mandated people there also seemed to be equally as clueless about their true need for recovery (at least most).

[SanderO]

Never been an addict, certainly to alcohol or drugs and what little I know of 12 step programs is that it is based on religious hokus pokus. Religion is usually part of the problem not the solution in people taking responsibility for their own decisions.

I resent the constant insertion of magic - god and religion - into our lives.

Total rubbish. I don't respect anyone who advocates religious based treatment programs. Nothing more than being a witch doctor.

[nicholasjh1]

You have no idea what the twelve steps is do you? one of the very first things they say at every meeting is 'your higher power as you see it' this includes the self, none I have been to was promoting a god agenda.

[Gensho]

HuffPost's Pick

I've been sober 7 years by applying the AA program. I was skeptical at first, but I performed the 12 steps as an experiment, and I got results. I would never discourage anyone from exploring and applying other methods for treating addiction. But AA has worked for me. I appreciate what Darren emphasizes in this article: my main problem as an addict was narcissism, and the steps have helped me to overcome that underlying self-centeredness.

[Plebean]

This describe, at times, most people I know, including myself.

Sad

[luling]

Wheat from chaff. That is what one must separate. The dynamics of AA can, indeed, be breathtakingly dysfunctional. And, there is a lot is 'wisdom' that is, in fact dyswisdom. How much of that is too much? "Mileage will vary" as the saying goes. Leaving aside the issue of whether or not someone buys into 12 step. owing to the fact that 12 step is revealed truth and believed via an act of faith, fact and logic are inapplicable, One need not believe. This disbelief is NOT 'denial'

I quit on my own. Which, being an adult, I am supposed to do; I did my duty. No one else could do it. Do it yourself are discounted. We have nothing to say -- we are not 'real alcoholics'.

people do have the right to choose for themselves. people need to know their options. It is called informed consent. This choosing includes rejecting AA and 12 step and choosing another path. I did just that. For good reason -- breathtakingly dysfunctiion dynamics of AA. And, 12 step is chaff to me.

[Dancingtheblues]

HuffPost's Pick

I've been doing professional addictions and mental health counseling for over twentyfive years. In my opinion the 12-step programs often contain a lot of psychological, sociological, practical, and philosophical wisdom as well as genuine human compassion and community. From my vantage point it is clear to me that the 12-step programs are most certainly not all bad and can be helpful to a lot of people, On the other hand, it is equally true that 12-step fellowships contain a lot of contradictory, nonsensical, and narrowminded BS and often exhibit breathtakingly dysfunctional interpersonal and group dynamics. In other words 12-step fellowships are most certainly not always good and are not universally sufficient nor helpful. If there are some problems in 12-step land then the problems must either be benign or harmful.

One of the problems I see is that 12-step advocates seldom, if ever, present a realistically balanced view of the pros AND cons of their program. When was the last time you heard a 12-step apologist publically address the inherent philosophical and practical problems of 12-step programs with ANY degree of specificity and critical self-awareness?

When outsiders are critical of the program they're usually dismissed as being angry 'nabobs of negativism' bent on destroying the 12-steps and its devotees. Will anyone within the 12-step fellowship acknowledge and admit when. where, and how the 12-step programs are as flawed as any other human endeavor? How about you Mr. Littlejohn?

[Darren Littlejohn - Huffpost Blogger]

@Dancingtheblues - Hi, yes, it's in the book. I have a chapter called 12-Step Programs: What Works and What Doesn't. This blog on Narcissism wasn't meant to address the validity of the 12 Steps, but since people keep asking for proof and healthy criticism from the "inside" I can only refer you to what I've spent a good part of my life researching and the past few years writing about. The next article will address Step One and how to apply it to addiction and self-centeredness. We might talk about spiritual narcissism as well.

[speedy0314]

Rather than suggesting others read your book, you might want to go back & read some of the more basic buddhist writings on the subject of "attachment".

You state unequivocally in your piece, "I believe that nothing is as effective for cutting through the self-centered, narcissistic ego of the addict as the 12 Step program." The post's title is headed: "The 12 Steps: An Antidote ...".

Yet, somehow readers are supposed to infer that "[t]his blog on Narcissism wasn't meant to address the validity of the 12 Steps".

This blog post is not simply about 'narcissism'. You very consciously wedded the condition to 12 Step therapy -- offering little more than anecdote & opinion on both subjects.

Pardon my speaking bluntly, but you're equivocating & I suspect you're aware of that. You seem quite "attached" to the notion of 12 Step's effectiveness & not terribly eager to examine that attachment. That's fine with me. I have no interest in changing your opinion. I do have an interest in offering a rational counter-opinion & an interest in pointing out where I believe your being disingenuous in a public forum. (The 'moderation' policy on your post has made that difficult for me, and that's an understatement.)

The 12 Steps are accompanied by 12 Traditions. If your post generates critique, then you should understand that it was you who initiated the "public controversy" (Tradition 10).

[Giada]

There are far more options today than there was a mere few years ago ... SMART, Women for Sobriety, Secular Organizations for Sobriety, Life Ring.

With WFS the book list is open, all ideas and approaches are accepted.

In Susan Cheever's biography of Bill, My Name is Bill, Bill Wilson's therapist suggests he no longer attend meetings. The AA philosophy, for Bill, created cognitive dissonance.

It has been ruled by the 9th circuit court AA is religious in nature and no one can be forced to attend.

[Montgriz]

AA has no requirements for membership other than the desire to break the addiction....and the life patterns and decisions that foster it and feed it....no court can coerce AA to accept anyone...AA is its membership.....

[speedy0314]

Actually, the only requirement "is a desire to stop drinking" (AA Preamble).

You're right, no court has coerced AA to "accept anyone".

Rather, it's AA that has persistently lobbied the court system to channel DUI/DWI offenders to meetings (read AA's own pamphlet on "Working With Courts, DUI, & Similar Programs"; GSO Watch puts the number of 'coerced' meeting attendants at nearly 60%).

Now, is that really "attraction rather than promotion"? Is Mr. Littlejohn's blog post on a highly trafficked Internet site "attraction rather than promotion"?

But Mr. Littlejohn insists in a comment that this blog post is not about the 12 Steps or AA. Why, then, do AA/12 Step proponents feel the need to fend off a "controversy" that by the author's contention is not intention of his piece ("The 12 Steps: An Antidote ...")?

[Giada]

Courts can and do mandate AA attendance. I've worked with Tom Hovarth of SMART Recovery in San Diego, who not infrequently has written letters to the court or appeared as the need may be to request alternate programs.

[luling]

In denial about their addiction?
Arrogant.

[soonerdru]

The thing about AA is this, and if you go to enough meetings you will hear it. Eventually a chair person will say "take what you want and leave the rest." Nobody forces anyone to do or believe anything. I've gone for awhile now. Don't pray and rarely talk. I take what makes sense and what dosen't I walk away laughing about. THEY can't make you do anything . . . it's all about making choices. It helped me, but it's not the only thing I rely on.

[crossoverwriter]

Anyone who says that the 12 steps don't work is probably in denial about their own addiction! Or not wanting to give up that last "iddy bitty" vice. You can work the steps whether you are religious, an agnostic or an atheist. Doesn't matter. Your higher power can be a flower, your own intuition, a creative force in the energetic field, or god. It's the community and the honesty and the right action that works.

[friendthegirl]

Well, this is a typical response from an AA member. Resorting to insinuations about their critics sobriety is par for the course. If you don't "get it," then you're probably actively drinking or you're a dry drunk, or you're angry (AAs have a taboo against feeling or expressing anger), or you're closed-minded...

By the way, exactly how to do turn your will over to a flower? How do you ask a flower to remove your defects, as the 12msteps require? This is a bait-and-switch used by AAs to make atheists and agnostics feel comfortable joining, but the Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous) makes it clear that eventually they will see the light (actual God, not flowers...). Wilson warns against scaring off the newcomers with alotta God Talk in his chapter on Agnostics, but says that eventually they realize that they need God in order to make it work.

[Darren Littlejohn - Huffpost Blogger]

@friendthegirl Wow you really have a lot of anger about AA! I'm sorry if you've had a bad experience. But in reality you are free not to go. You do realize that, right? My sponsor used to say, "We are free to do whatever we want, as long as we're willing to pay the consequences." So if you don't want to do 12 steps, then don't. Maybe you can find a more productive mission in life besides trying to discredit the 12 Step community that helps people to end suffering and misery for themselves and others.

[Montgriz]

Your understanding of AA is vastly different from mine. For me, I could care less if some has a higher power that differs from mine which, by the way, is vaguely more eternal and causitive than any deity I have ever heard of....I think you are missing the point about the AA version of God...they have none.....you are projecting, which is fine. But, I assure you, by doing the Steps, and maintaining a closeness with AA, the program you develop will be yours and you will be comfortable in your self enough to know that there is a power, or energy guiding the universe and it is not one's own ego. But, for that freedom to occur, one must first be open and truly desire a better life....free of substances that do more harm than good for some people.....that is the beauty of AA...

[AnnaZed]

Ummm, no, that whole thing about atheists and agnostics being able to practice AA (actually practice it, as written) is false.

The Higher Power of AA is a very specific, favor dispensing, magical force that reaches inside of the supplicant (the AA member actually following the program as written) and changes them. This is the central tenet of AA dogma and (no) flowers do not have the power to do that; and most people are not stupid enough to think that they do. That's why 95% of those who encounter AA leave either as soon as their court cards are all signed, or sooner.

It is only after the AA member accepts the narrowly defined AA God and declares himself or herself "powerless" without the intervention of this mystical entity that they are assured that they will be free of the desire to drink. Those who can not or will not do that are shunned, humiliated and abandoned while simultaneously told that they are not honest enough to "follow this simple program."

Those who question the goofball theology of 12-step religion are familiar with these gossamer rebuttals: (1.) critics must be drunk or have drug problems themselves to be critical of AA or (2.) critics just don't understand that "anything" (a doorknob is often ~ strangely enough ~ suggested) can be your own personal higher power.

This last, if you actually attempt to follow Bill Wilson's abstinence religion is simply a recruitment lie.

[angusblackwylde]

If AA is truly a religious entity, then how can courts require people to go? Seems like all one would have to do is fight that in court as state imposed attendance of a religious organization. There should be lawsuits by the dozens and this practice would stop.

Current research has scientists identifying alleles and markers for addiction in general and attempting to further develop drugs that inhibit the affect of substances. Shick-Shadel pseudo guarantees success with aversion therapy, but if it were effective, courts would just send you there and problem solved forever.

I believe chemical dependence is akin to Type 2 Diabetes, Hyper-tension, ADHD, Asthma - some combination of heredity, environment, and choice. A different mixture for everyone.

I have never been to an AA meeting where anyone tried to indoctrinate me to anything. I'm critical of AA, and I take what I need and leave the rest. I also attend S.M.A.R.T. meetings, and a Buddhist meeting, read Rational Recovery literature and have always thought the tools Albert Ellis helped define ( though the Stoics defined them first ), to be helpful.

I can overlook the "Higher Power" and "God" in AA just as I overlook "In God We Trust" on money. It doesn't have to have ideological purity to be useful.

I do believe AA can scare people into thinking that if they don't attend, it is just a matter of time before they fall again. I can sense this in meetings.

[hjfreelib]

This post is meant only to clarify and not to make a judgement about your experience. AA is not a religious entity and does not promote one form of spirituality over another. The program is based upon the individual's spiritual solution and relationship with a Higher Power. The Higher Power concept is based upon the individual's personal concept of what or whom that entity means to him/her.

I am sorry to hear that you did not have a good experience with AA, and I also wish you the very best on your path.

[friendthegirl]

Actually, AA has been ruled to be religious by the courts, in cases where people protested their sentences to attend meetings on the grounds that it violates their constitutional rights.

friendthegirl
http://donewithaa.wordpress.com

[BassguyGG]

This thread shows a real lack of understanding. What the Twelve Steps do is to make the addict take a hard look at himself and get a handle on the CAUSES of his addiction. Something doesn't come from nothing. Not using is not enough, you have to get to the root of the emotional triggers that make you want to use. Otherwise you're doomed to failure.

Obviously the Twelve Steps are not the only way. There is a lot of emphasis on them in recovery and there is a great reverence for them in Recovery circles; perhaps too much. Is it the only way? Of course not. But it is a journey and a process that takes you through some changes that you need to make if you truly intend to stay clean.

[Montgriz]

Sadly, for many people that is all too true...I have never known anyone who stayed even relatively close to AA who has returned to their old ways of living.....

[mikeblamedenial]

There is no qualification in the generally-accepted definitions of religion which AA does not meet. It has a formula for salvation, a favor (sobriety)-granting deity, prayers, rituals, dogma, and sacred text. I have often heard the big-book referred to as the word of God as revealed through its authors, and the program itself as God-given. Sounds very religious from here, and to district courts of appeal with jurisdiction over sixteen states to date.

[crossoverwriter]

The 12 steps worked for me. Going on 19 years. I love Drew Pinsky. really good guy, and genuinely trying to heal people. Everyone could benefit from reading the 12 & 12, not just narcissistic Hollywood types or even alcoholics/addicts.
Take the right action and turn over the results!

[Darren Littlejohn - Huffpost Blogger]

HuffPost's Pick

I agree @crossoverwriter. Love Drew. Love the steps. Sometimes don't love everybody in the programs but hey, that's my own limitation, not theirs. I also agree fervently that anyone could benefit from reading the AA Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, along with the NA It Works How and Why. To that end, I made a careful and long term study of both of these and incorporate them into the 12-Step Buddhist. Part of my intent was to help people see past certain limitations, such as the ones that have been discussed here.

[Malkin71]

To all of those who AA worked for great, but remember Phen Phen worked for a lot of people, too.

They'd swear by it.

[Andrew Chapman]

Through some strange events I was asked to lead a 12 step meditation group in Kansas City MO. I can honestly say that without spiritualism involved in my 12 step program I would not be successful. I have tried in the past and it did not work.

If you do or do not like 12 step programs you should at least know that there are those who use them and they help. I use mine with my Buddhist meditation, medication, and therapy. I have never been happier in my life.

If you are not willing to use stereo-types do describe different races, political views, or religions I think it is unfair to stereo-type 12 step programs based on what your perception of a couple of groups may be like. There are different type of groups for different type of people. Not just NA,SA,AA but socially as well.

[friendthegirl]

Andrew, as someone who doesn't like 12 step programs, I do want to make it very clear that I do not begrudge anyone their path. My intenent in criticizing AA/12-Step is to ultimately see innovations in addictions treatment, which has been stymied by the fact that the 12-Step model is generally perceived as the only way. Look, if you write to a mainstream advice columnest about addiction, without any deviation, they will direct you to AA. They'll even help you find a meeting.

You know, as an 12-Step advocate, you are in the majority. And, while you're admonishing critics to check their stereotyping, your position as a member of the majority, makes this argument sound a lot like those rich old white Christian dudes who complain that they're being discriminated against.

What I want to see is for AA to take its rightful place, as a religious entity that is right for some, and make way for some real innovation in addictions treatment.

friendthegirl
http://donewithaa.wordpress.com

[Montgriz]

You have drawn a conclusion of AA that is at odds with reality. That isn't unusual. Still, I have noticed that every treatment program, every rehab center, exposes their clientele to daily AA meeting and step studies.....even shrinks and medical people. I know of no AA affiliate or group that holds it as a religion. That is your own perception. It is incorrect at best....but, really, does it matter? For those who want a better life free from substance and behavior abuse, AA offers a complete way to that....no one forces anyone to do anything....it is about personal choices, and ironically, your views are very much along the narcissistic views that oftentimes prevent a happy recovery for many.....