It made me want to cry -- or scream -- or both.
That's how I felt watching the trailer for the upcoming film "Miss Representation" -- about the depiction of women in the media. (If you haven't seen it yet, click here and watch right this minute; then read the rest of this.)
It's not hard to see why the film's message strikes a chord or why women are sending it flying around Facebook.
"Miss Representation" is beautifully done and includes interviews with an amazing array of accomplished women, but to me, what stands out is the feeling of déjà vu. And not just because Gloria Steinem is interviewed.
What Steinem helped to lead was called the women's "movement." The movie trailer makes you wonder whether we've really moved forward -- or if we've moved backwards.
In a poignant way, the film illustrates much of what we've gained -- and lost. And it's hard not to see the irony in the phrase women's "liberation" when the women of yesterday freed themselves from girdles and burned their bras, only to see today's women stuffed in Spanx and sporting silicone.
Not to mention how confusing the mixed messages about what it means to be a woman are for our daughters. And our sons.
I would venture to guess that some of the same women posting the trailer on Facebook are getting regular botox injections and buying their toddlers sexy costumes for Halloween.
Women -- at least, most of us -- have always wanted to look beautiful, young and sexy. And there's nothing wrong with that. The problem is a matter of priority and degree. The sexualization of women is so pervasive and insidious that it's become grotesque, and it practically extends from birth to death.
We've come a long way, baby?
Today the tiny female hand still grasping a baby bottle might be already wearing nail polish. And with women getting cosmetic surgery into their 80s, beauty products will have to be pried out of our cold dead hands.
It's typical and even trendy to blame the media. Though women are still under-represented at the highest levels, there are far more women in all areas of the media; yet things have still gotten worse.
It's not only them, it's us.
While I agree that the media bears some responsibility, my view is that change will not come from the top, but from the bottom (I'm not just talking about Spanx here). And that won't happen while we continue buying the products -- and by extension, the message.
I wish I had better answers. This is a complex problem involving economics, politics, sociology, psychology and biology that can't change overnight. But maybe, just maybe, American women are wising up and will start rising up.
That's part of the strategy behind the film , whose website includes a call to sign a pledge to spread the word about the way women are presented in the media (I signed and hope you will too).
Hopefully "Miss Representation" will be an important start. Although I hesitate to use the word start ... the more important question is when and where it will end.
Follow Darryle Pollack on Twitter: www.twitter.com/DarryleP
We have a review of the entire doc on TVFirstLook. This is a disastrously bad documentary. Valid topic, yes. But a terrible movie.
"It's beautifully done..." That's outrageous. Watch the documentary first, then review. If you are passionate about the topic, that's one thing. But to suggest to people that they watch this dreck is, well, silly! As a TV critic, I'm offended.
There's nothing wrong with being sexy, but when that image obscures any other valuable traits a woman has, it becomes dangerous. It's as if sex is used because the woman has nothing else in her arsenal to fight with. And on the flip side, you have women that are so scared that their abilities will be under-appreciated that they do their best to hide themselves, thinking that if society doesn't have a pretty visual to focus on, the focus will have to shift to their abilities. These are 2 extremes on the same spectrum, and I think the healthier point is closer to the middle.
Women can be capable and sexy at the same time, and we don't have to sacrifice one for the other. It can be part of the same package.
The act or process of sexualizing.
Verb
sexualize (third-person singular simple present sexualizes, present participle sexualizing, simple past and past participle sexualized)
To make sexual.
From wiki.
Ok I do believe male and female are sexual. So the phrase:
"The problem is a matter of priority and degree. The sexualization of women is so pervasive and insidious that it's become grotesque, and it practically extends from birth to death."
Is some what true. But the author does not describe degree and pervasiveness. My point is that since time began the degree and pervasiveness is pretty much held steady. There maybe more "media" and exposure with the technology but that is not the heart of the matter. The only wising up and rising up a woman needs is to be confident in herself, love herself as she is and not be so danged concerned what others think of her traits/characteristics unless the fall into the reallm of the 7 sins...
Are problem in USA society is that we do deal well with sexuality. Heck the naked body offends many if not the majority. Most often you can not talk maturely about sexuality or express yourself. The USA has was to many hangups and immaturity in their attitudes.
They just have to be willing to live with the trade off...
You won't get the attention with which society rewards those women.
Make that trade and you don't have to "rise up" against anything...you just have to walk away.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/signe-whitson/thinner-sexier-hotter-3-w_b_1007496.html
Changing the way we depict women, think about women and talk about women is a noble goal, and as the father of a 12-year-old girl, I would love for her to grow up in a world where her (and her peers') intelligence, sense of humor, resourcefulness, courage, loyalty and thoughtfulness are valued above all else.
It looks like a long road ahead, though.
That's not a judgement, just an observation from a father with a 9-year-old daughter. Luckily, she has to wear a school uniform, so we don't battle over what she wears, but I do wonder about the parents who let their high school girls go to school wearing what they wear. Say what you will about the media, but it's up to the parents to use their power to change things.
I don't come at it from a moralistic persepctive, as I hate moralizing. I come at it from a logical point of view. Before she does anything, I want her to be aware of possible outcomes.
that said, I taught them NOT to listen to Gloria Whatshername, I taught them to listen as much as they like to be listened to, I taught them to respect, I taught them NOT to let any "movement" define who they ARE what they should DO or what their path to happiness will be.
And I think those pinups are fine... sexy... good for "society" .. but, that's because I also had two boys and, heck, if all girls were like their sisters, there goes their fun !!
Women have to treat themselves with respect. Boys have eyes and they can see right through the blatant hypocrisy in the messages we send them. We can't rely on brainwashing and propaganda that contradicts the actual female behavior they see in their peers and in the media. Women worthy of respect start by choosing men who respect them. If you choose men who treat you like crap then you tell other men that's how you get the girl.
Manhood ought to be what men define it to be for the sake of men's self identity. Women need to stop ramming feminist theory down our masculine throats while telling women to act more like men to get that promotion. We will be masculine and it can be well and good. Being girly is not what they want to be because girls don't like girly men. The presence of honor forethought, and respect are the traits the men they choose must have if they wish to see more of it in men.
It comes down to this. Save the "rape" speech. I've read it here a hundred times before and it has no place as a response to my comment, as I was talking about the same thing the article was: the manner in which women are portrayed in the media.
Save the speech for the men who actually say "boys will be boys" or "she was asking for it, look at what she's wearing." That guy isn't me.
Sexual liberation was destined to result in these outcomes. The idea of being denied something you should have and empowered to exploit your new found access to it inspires boundary testing.
The presumption that all social boundaries set in the past were working against women to make their lives worse when in fact many of them simply maintained a level of civil responsibility that kept our bad sexual habits at bay. These rules restricted men and women but women in particular since men chased them and not the other way around. Being in this position of power increases a women's responsibilities to restrain herself absent the impediments that face males who are restricted mainly by the need to conform to female standards.
When women are not being socially responsible they find themselves competing with other women in never ending contest that push's the limits of sexual expression. For all of our sake it would be wise to recognize some behavior as unacceptable or at least at least harmful. Our goal should still be to make a society where girls can grow up find a nice man and have children, not just spend their adult years exploring sexuality in a vicious cycle where both genders become objectified.
Hetero's are the vast majority and if not we would not be able to sustain our population. This is common sense stuff. The non hetero community should respect the vital role they have.
It's time we start acting like adults again instead of dreamy eyed hippies thinking happiness is the only purpose to life. As far as happily ever after it is a myth and we should tell our kids that. They should be under no illusions as to what life is really about because too many of us grown ups clearly are.
There is a lot more going in a society that goes beyond the personal happiness of those in it. We stay aware of that and try to broaden our perspective. We can't keep trashing the legacy of enlightened adulthood left to us by our ancestors without leaving in the society in so much ruin that people again clamor for conservative ideals to correct it.