THE BLOG
07/01/2013 01:40 pm ET | Updated Aug 31, 2013

DOMA and the Rise of the GOP Quack Pack

Rand Paul, Michele Bachmann and even Chris Christie made it official this week: We've had the Rat pack, the Brat Pack, and now, the Quack Pack -- the new GOP media elite, intent on waging a war on smart.

Like little kids in school hurling insults and seeing it gets them lots of attention, before they've learned the lessons of blowback, those most often quoted among the GOP are its biggest quacks -- waddling before the cameras, lining up to pimp out their idiocy and bigotry to the mass media.

News outlets of all shapes and sizes lap it up, following a simple and timeless formula: Stupid plus famous equals big bucks. The new GOP has earned a veritable PhD in promoting the storied stupid in prime time.

Reacting to Wednesday's Supreme Court ruling invalidating federal discrimination against same-sex marriage, the Quack Pack was on high alert this week, speaking fluent Moron to the press, interpreting God's law from the chambers of government institutions, thus ignoring any pretense of separation between Church and hate (oops, I meant, State) spewing fear, anger, discrimination, and disrespect:

-- Senator Rand Paul (R-KY) on same-sex marriage: "I think this is the conundrum and gets back to what you were saying in the opening -- whether or not churches should decide this. But it is difficult because if we have no laws on this people take it to one extension further. Does it have to be humans?" Really? Miss Piggy is already on her way to the alter? What's she wearing?

-- Republican New Jersey Governor Chris Christie on same-sex marriage, "I've made it very clear since 2009 that I believe that marriage should be between one man and one woman. I've said that, I ran on that, I've said it consistently. That doesn't mean, in any way shape or form, that I have anything against folks who are homosexual." Right, except they shouldn't have equal rights. Other than that, I love 'em.

-- Speaking amongst 12 colleagues from a podium planted at the United States Congress (and not her neighborhood church), U.S. Representative Michele Bachmann (R-MN) on same-sex marriage, said of the U.S. Supreme Court, a branch of the government she is sworn to protect and defend, "They attacked something that they have no jurisdiction over whatsoever -- the foundational unit of our society -- which is marriage. That is something that God created. That is something that God will define." She then added, "The Supreme Court, though they may think so, have not risen to the level of God," And since you believe that God created us, then that includes gays, and... and... so oooh geez it's all so confusing.

I'm sure the media outlets tell themselves that we (the people) need distraction and diversion, and this stuff is fun. Yet beyond that, the Quack Pack has an impact that's quite tangible. Speaking with a pair of FOX News fans while traveling through the Midwest this week, one of them actually said, "After all, Obama is a Muslim," to which I replied, "Where do you get that?" And she said she saw it on FOX -- after all, she said, it's his middle name: "Hussein." Really? You can tell from the name?

Look, if I were a proud member of the GOP, I too would be horrified by the rise of the Quacks. That said, the GOP is doing nothing to stop it. Why not? Because they are stuck on the formula that media equals power equals money, ignoring (like the 10-year-olds in the school yard), that although stupid sells, there's blowback on all of us.

I would like to join Nancy Pelosi's point of view, as in "Who cares?" That may well be the right point of view here. Yet, blitzed with the tsunami of fluent Moron, it begins to erode the intellectual fabric of our society, such as it is. I think we should all care, and exercise leadership by voting against and boycotting the products and services associated with the Quack Pack. Stop paying attention to their YouTube, tweets, and Facebooks. Your brain cells -- and maybe even your children's SAT scores -- will thank you later.