I was thinking today that maybe the problem that America is having deciding over our two presidential candidates is the fact that there are only two choices and the average person today has no idea how to pick between two things anymore.
Our lives are inundated with WAY too many choices.
It takes on average, four or five days just to make it through the cable guide. I mean how many times a day do you hear about a "series finale" of a show that has been on the air for five years that you have never heard of? Having to choose one show or film on Netflix, Amazon, Hulu is so physically exhausting that the sheer act of looking quickly becomes a substitute for that night's entertainment distraction. A search party on Mt. McKinley right after a fresh avalanche doesn't take as long and odds are likely that they will find whoever is missing a lot faster than it will take you to find something to watch.
If you're single and you're on Match.com you will discover that there are more pictures posted there than in your average Manhattan mug shot book.
I'm guessing that the menu at your favorite restaurant resembles the dead sea scrolls. And then the waiter magically appears to recite that night's specials and you realize that you stopped listening somewhere around the time he said, "Good evening, can I tell you about tonight's specials?"
There simply are no easy decisions to make anymore.
If you go shopping on Amazon.com to buy something as simple as say, a sewing needle, odds are likely that there will be somewhere between 7 and 10 million choices. Sharp. Not so sharp. Too sharp. Blunt. Blunt but flavored. The list goes on.
Now that we can stream our favorite tunes, the days of saving up for that one or two albums that you are lusting for is long over. Today we fill our computers up with music like we're stocking up our refrigerators for a nuclear winter.
Basically our lives are one big Costco now and all we do is buy bulk.
Think of virtually anything that you want on any average day and I will guarantee you that you will be faced with more choices than a World War Two general.
Cereal? Those aisles are like a Kellogs Museum. There are 7,000 types of dates in Whole Foods. But not as much as Match.com.
Want to buy a car? A TV? An air conditioner? Toothpaste? Assassins of time all.
God do I ever miss the days of chocolate or vanilla? Now your local ice cream store gives you brain freeze by forcing you to select one flavor from their ten miles of scoop bins.
And yet we don't want four hundred wives or husbands. We want one who will hopefully not wear out before we do. Most of us want one or two kids. One dog. One cat. One dental appointment every year, thank you very much. One car works. One smart phone. One lap top. Per person that is.
So when it comes to our most intimate selves, the fact is we really do prefer to have as few choices as possible. That's certainly what marriage does for you. It creates a very tidy limit for you which may or may not be to your liking, especially if your last name rhymes with Hump.
So unless the rules suddenly change and harems and/or Mormonism suddenly become the rage, we will continue to keep our lives both countable and containable.
So, the election. It's a problem for a lot of folks. I mean they tried to add a few extra fun candidates, but at least one of them can't name even one world leader that he admires and the other choice is for the guy who thinks that Vlad Putin is the nuclear bomb.
And yet you're still scratching your head?
Your other choice it would seem is a no brainer: she is skilled, experienced, professional politician who is at her best, a life-long champion of the common man, woman and child. Her resume basically says: better than him.
But what the opposition to that choice is doing is trying to confuse you just like all those fake reviews on Amazon that want to dissuade you from buying that particular product by giving it one star while trying to convince you, with distortions and lies, that that this is one very bad and potentially dangerous choice.
And since we are all in the instant gratification business, it's our knee jerk reaction to move on to the next product.
The fact is we spend most of our time evaluating choices instead of actually making them.
Making choices has become a huge commitment these days because no decision is easy to make any more.
We distrust our own instincts. And the world of commerce keeps killing us by coming out with that next hot watch or TV with that MUST HAVE technology three seconds after you hit the buy now button.
So maybe it's time to simplify our lives and instead of listening to the endless hype and in your face manipulative commercials or worse, the "expert" opinions of all those news outlet/talking head pundits who deal in paranoia, mass hysteria and make-believe (re: conservative radio) do yourself a favor and go old school.
Try listening to the one and only thing that you will ever need.
Your gut.
Though I hear Apple is coming out with a new one.