Now that the "Conveneracy of Donces" is over, I am officially in full recovery mode from the four-day psychotic break that I've had to endure.
It's all Good Night Moon now.
Goodnight speeches by The Don's children, Connie, Fredo and Fredo Jr.
Goodnight paint by numbers speech by Melonoma with its Michelle Obama/ "I'm taking that, that's mine," highlights.
Goodnight that sweaty, hyperactive idiot minister who actually called the Democrats "race baiting."
Goodnight Chris Crisco, attorney at law, and that Up With People. whip em up into a mob frenzy chant of "lock her up."
Goodnight Al Baldasaro, a New Hampshire state representative who told radio host Jeff Kuhner Tuesday that Clinton "should be put in the firing line and shot for treason."
Now that we are done with this Goodnight Moon elimination round process, sadly we must turn to the other fairy tale paradigm, Pinocchio.
The front page of the New York Post screams, "I AM YOUR VOICE!" and for once, the Rupert Murdoch She Wrote piece of shit got it right.
Trump, aka the new star of "Law and Order" has no voice of his own. He also has no thoughts, no ideas no plans and according to Tony Schwartz, the real author of the completely manufactured "The Art of the Deal," he has no attention span whatsoever.
What Trump is doing is imitating (*in reality, mocking) the inner voices of the desperately illiterate and clueless people of this country who up till now have Klan gathered like buzzards in their confederate flag underpants, while privately attacking the "n*gger president (as I have been told they do in some of the major cities of Texas from people who live there and have it first hand in boardrooms). The rest just report the fake new of Fox.
He became a viable candidate by letting them do and say whatever they want without fear of any consequences whatsoever. And he did it by acting just like them.
He has been insulting and loud as any alcohol and meth fueled trailer park domestic squabble.
And that is his version of law and order.
The fact that he has no attention span (at one point told Governor Kasich that he could run the entire show while he went out and made American great) can be the only reason why he has conveniently forgotten insulting blacks, women, Latinos and handicapped people.
But even worse he is Pinocchio.
And not only because all he has ever done is lie for his entire life (did you know his father co-signed loans because no one would work with him in New York? And of course you all know about his endless bankruptcies, colossal, crushing debt and his refusal to pay people for work done).
Until now he's gotten away with murder, as opposed to Murdoch, because in our culture we like to give large breaks to celebrities while privately enjoying their publicly humiliating demise.
That is the entire premise of virtually any single reality show on TV.
As for Pinocchio, the nose growing condition is not really what I am referring to, but knock yourself out if that image works for you.
I am referring to his anarchic trip to Pleasure Island amusement park where boys can be naughty as much as they like and treat themselves to beer and cigars.
But there's a catch to all this; since they are acting like jackasses, the magic of the island gradually turns them into braying donkeys, which the coachman sells into a lifetime of humiliation and slavery in circuses and mines. Pinocchio starts to change into a donkey, growing long ears and a tail, but before the transformation is complete he manages to flee the horrible amusement park, and returns home.
That convention, or the Orange-C as I like to call it, was nothing than a town hall meeting at Pleasure Island.
All that was offered were the exact same promises that Hitler offered to pre-war Germany.
You will become a pure white super society and only know great riches. Or as Hitler said, "Believe me. Believe me. Believe me."
And how did he accomplish those feats?
By turning his administration into a band mass murdering thugs who satisfied one all by blaming all of Germany's personal losses on one single minority.
And he built really, really big walls around concentration camps.
Do not think for a second that this is an exaggeration.
This is what I am trying to wash off my skin this morning.
If America allows this to go on for one more second, then the return of right wing fascism---which is what Ted Cruz has lusted for all along---will inherit the earth.
I am a proud New Yorker who salutes my brothers who tormented and humiliated Mr. Cruz during his two second attempt to rally New Yorkers---after talking in the anti-Semitic code of "New York Values"---while his wife worked for, I'm sorry, who? Oh yeah. Goldman Sachs.
Woody Allen famously said if Jesus ever came back and saw what was happening he would throw up.
And trust me he would do more than that.
Look, I get it. While I respect anyone's personal need for organized religion, to me, personally, since fanatics BELIEVE and ACCEPT the garden of Eden stories as absolute FACT then that can only be the one and only reason that the Pleasure Island Asses are willing to BELIEVE, and ACCEPT and hee-haw their unequivocal approval of Donald Trump.
It is the exact same thing. It is childish. It is desperate. It creates meaning and made up answers (without substance) where there is none.
The sad part is that it is all being sold to them in the name of their faith.
The next time you see a hurricane, tornado or flood in yet another red state, remember who is clearly showing them his...and his son's...wrath.
And who will they turn to for help?
Their intrusive government.
And amen to that.