THE BLOG

My New Years Meta-Resolutions

01/01/2010 12:08 pm ET | Updated Nov 17, 2011

Is there any holiday less real than New Year's Eve? It celebrates what? The completion of an orbit around the Sun? But every day does that, so we're really just celebrating having picked an arbitrary day to celebrate. Yay for us. We made it around the Sun again. Good job, Earth!

What a sorry excuse for getting drunk.

So, in the spirit of the season, I offer the following content-free meta-resolutions:

I will make good resolutions this year.

I will follow through on those resolutions.

If I do not follow through on them, I resolve to make better resolutions next year.

There, am I done?