"Einstein on the Beach": A Roasted Playlist for David Hasselhoff

Until he has his own 24-hour Hoff-story Channel, here's a playlist for an iconic lifeguard who somehow keeps floating towards the top.
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At the tail end of the past century, I found myself trapped inside the famed American hotel in Amsterdam by a massive crowd blocking the entrance. I rushed over to the front desk, and asked what the hell was going on. A manager looked at me as if I should have known, and said simply and rather quietly, "Hasselhoff."

For a second, I considered asking what the hell this word "Hasselhoff" meant in English, but then I realized that I was baring witness to the enduring global pop culture force that is David Hasselhoff. "Before long I'll have my own channel -- I'll be like Barney," Hasselhoff once said. The Hoff may not achieve that particular American Dream yet, but he's already lived a few.

And now the dream continues with his very own Comedy Central Roast - which I am about to watch -- and his upcoming A&E reality series with his two daughters. Until he has his own 24-hour Hoff-story Channel, here's a playlist for an iconic lifeguard who somehow keeps floating towards the top.

EINSTEIN ON THE BEACH - Counting Crows
I WANNA BE A LIFEGUARD - Blotto
PONTIAC - Lyle Lovett
SILENCE KIT - Pavement
TALENT SHOW - The Replacements
WATER - Brad Paisley
SPEEDO - The Cadillacs
STREET HASSLE - Lou Reed
BOYS OF SUMMER - Don Henley
KNIGHTS IN WHITE SATIN - Moody Blues
BEAR CAN BEACH - Surf Punks
CATCH A WAVE - Beach Boys
COME BACK SONG - Darius Rucker
NIGHT MOVES - Bob Seger & The Silver Bullet Band
WAVE - Antonio Carlos Jobim
BEACH BABY - First Class
DRINKING AGAIN - Frank Sinatra
CALIFORNIA GURLS - Katy Perry featuring Snoop Dogg
DOIN' TIME UNDER THE LIFEGUARD STAND - Eddie From Ohio
BALLET FOR A GIRL IN BUCHANNON - Chicago
LIFEGUARD SLEEPING, GIRL DROWNING - Morrissey
CALIFORNIA DREAMIN' - David Hasselhoff

Now please go ahead and get your "Rocks Hoff" and share your very own Songs Of David.

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