Are you a dating waiter? Are you somebody who is always waiting for things to happen in their love life, instead of going out and actually making them happen?
I love the term "dating waiter." A dating waiter is that person who goes out on a Friday or Saturday night, then sits there and wonders why people are not approaching them or talking to them.
What the dating waiter is often unaware of is that their body language is standoffish. Not only that, but they are unapproachable in all sorts of ways.
Dating waiters usually blame other people for the problems in their dating life. They will say things like, "there are no good men (or women) out there today" or "there are no good men (or women) where I live."
They are always coming up with an excuse for why their dating life is not good. The excuses are usually not all that clever either. In my fourteen years of coaching people, I think I've heard every conceivable excuse.
My favorite one is when women say, "there are no good men out there." I love that excuse from women. No good men out there -- really?!
What happens when you are out in the world with that mindset, is that you will never find a good man. Your beliefs are very powerful. So when you walk around all day long with the firm belief that there are no good men to meet, you will not meet anybody.
You of course are not going to meet anybody, because you have the attitude of a dating waiter. You are standoffish and your belief system says that there are no good men out there, so you in turn are really not going to communicate with people.
My mindset has always been that there are amazing and wonderful people to meet everywhere I go and no matter where I am. With that attitude and mindset, I am always communicating with people and thus attract great people. I attract other people who believe that there are great people to meet and who lead a very positive life.
Dating waiters tend to lead a life that is not very positive. They have excuses for everything in life, and tend to live in fear. It's easier for them to embrace their fears and excuses than to get out of their comfort zone and actually make an effort.
I know so many people who have started dating online who tell me that "men online only want sex" or "women online are all sluts." Neither of these statements are true. Just like in real life, there are a percentage of people who may be like this, but there are also great people online. It's all about your mindset and your attitude.
Dating is work. You don't get anything in life by waiting for it to come to you. You won't become financially successful by waiting. You won't get good at your job by waiting. You won't become a good parent by waiting.
You have to be proactive about everything want to achieve in life. When you're proactive, you will start to get some those things in life that you want. Your life will change, and you will start seeing unbelievable results.
So if you are somebody who is a dating waiter, here is the best advice I can give you: Anything you get in life that is good is something for which you have to work. You have to be willing to go for what you want.
So to those women who think there are no good men out there and to those men who think there are no nice women out there, I must beg to differ! There are tons of them. You just need to change your mindset before you will be able to find them.