05/23/2011 07:15 pm ET | Updated Jul 23, 2011

The Cheatanator Arnold Schwarzenegger; What Next?

Some not-so-shocking news last week when it was announced that Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver are getting a divorce. But for many, it was quite shocking when they also announced that Arnold has a love child from a former family helper. Apparently, he had sex with a woman who was living in his house and helping around the home all day long. What a shock.

I've lived in LA now since 1997. I remember the first time I saw the ex-Governator. It was at his place called Schotzis on Main Street, where a friend of mine was performing a magic show. There I was, watching Arnold (who was married with kids at the time) next to me smoke cigars and flirt around in public with random women. Maybe I should have been minding my own business, but that's the celebrity phenomenon. It's what we do when we see a celebrity: like a car wreck on the side of the highway, we tend to forget what we're doing and sneak a peek at what they're up to.

So I started watching Arnold work the room. I would watch women strut over to his table and sit on his lap. I watched him open his arms, I watched him flirt, and I watched him fondle--all the while with a huge grin on his face and a cigar in his mouth. Actually, we called him the Fondlelator and the Cheatanator back then way before he was the Governator. So this isn't exactly shocking news that Arnold is actually getting a divorce now.

What is shocking is why did it take so long for her to finally pull the trigger? C'mon, 25 years of a marriage with a man who was probably cheating the entire time. I never understood that, how women can just sit back the entire time, know that her husband is cheating on her, yet do absolutely nothing about it. Now granted, it was a power marriage. Maria probably loved the power, loved being the Governor's wife and so forth, and before that enjoyed the perks of being the wife of a famous actor and a well-connected businessman. But still, to give up 25 years of your personal life for a man who you know is cheating? 25 years you sacrifice until you finally demand a divorce. I never understood that mentality. Sitting back knowing what your husband is up to, yet not doing a thing to move forward on your own.

So I ask, is that kind of behavior a sign of weakness in a woman? Conversely, would it be a sign of weakness in a man to allow his wife to cheat on him for such a long time? Is it a sign of somebody who's very needy in the relationship and too afraid of being alone to do anything about it?

Let's explore this phenomenon a little bit more, because I think it's quite common for a lot of people. How many of you have been the victim of a cheating partner, yet you hung on to the relationship for a long time before you finally called it quits? Conversely, how many of have cheated on your significant other and would like to share the reasons behind why you cheated? I think we have a lot to learn from each other, from both sides of the equation.

So for those of you who are shocked at the ex-Governator, the ex-Terminator, the Cheatanator, don't be. Anybody who's seen him out in Los Angeles knew that this man was cheating. When you saw him out, you always knew that it would only be a matter of time before he would start publicly fondling or flirting with another woman. Yet it took 25 years for Maria to finally give him the boot. Is that real love or was their marriage just a façade? Did she do her best to keep the marriage together? Or is 25 years of doing nothing really the sign of a woman who's desperate and lacking the confidence to get out and give it a go on her own?

Let's discuss this. I want a lively debate today. I want to know your experiences with cheaters, I want to know your experiences as a cheater. Most of all, I want to find out more about what motivates people to stay with their cheating spouses and wait so long to get divorced.
Maybe some of you will actually defend Sir Arnold. Maybe some of you will offer excuses for him. I'm interested in those too. We know how he behaved in public, can you imagine a live-in nanny or a live-in maid around the house? Maybe they were just asking for it. Maybe Maria should have kept Arnold away from women the way you're supposed to keep toddlers away from plastic grocery bags--locked away and out of reach.