04/12/2010 05:12 am ET | Updated May 25, 2011

What We Can Learn From Charlie Sheen

We're such a celebrity-obsessed culture. We spend so much time talking about celebrity relationships.

Are Brad and Angelina heading toward divorce? Is Tom Cruise so obsessed with Katie Holmes that he is keeping her under lock and key as she gets closer and closer to losing her own identity?

What we fail to learn in all this curiosity about these celebrities are the messages their stories have for us and how their stories relate to our everyday lives. Life is all about relating things we see and hear to our own life, and is not about getting caught up in a fantasy celebrity world of other people's business.

So what messages do Charlie Sheen and his crazy life have for us? What can we learn from Charlie Sheen? While it might outwardly appear that your life and Charlie Sheen's life bear little resemblance to one another, you might be surprised.

Charlie Sheen is a man who was addicted to hookers, and was one of Heidi Fleiss' favorite customers. Then years ago, seemingly out of the blue, he decides to settle down with Denise Richards. He made what is now a famous comment about how she was in the top 10% of women with whom he'd had sex (meaning that of the approximately 2,000 women he had slept with, she was in the top 200).

Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards had a couple kids together, but couldn't hold the relationship together and ultimately got divorced. He's now with a new woman, and his frustration has already started mounting.

On Christmas Day, he apparently decided to take a swing at her and see what would happen. She, of course, obtained restraining orders against him. At that point, their relationship (which was probably already disintegrating) went right down the tubes.

What can we learn from Charlie Sheen? Well, believe it or not, there is much to be learned from him and his life.

Obviously, Charlie Sheen is a man who does not know how to keep a relationship together. He is probably much better off not being in a committed relationship, playing and having sex with random women.

What about our own lives? Are you someone who has been married a few times? Have you had kids in those marriages thinking "This is going to be the one. I am going to have kids with this woman because I love her," only to have the relationship not work out?

The real questions that you need to ask yourself are these: Who are you? What are you all about as a person? What do you want in life?

Not everyone is cut out to be a father. Not everyone is cut out to be a mother. Not everyone can hold a relationship together.

Some of us are better on our own. Some of us are better with the 'flavor of the month.'

Some of us don't even know how to have a relationship. Once our relationships get past the infatuation stage (which is usually anywhere from the first six to eighteen months), they tend to fizzle out and end. We get frustrated that these same patterns and these same mistakes get repeated over and over again.

So, really, what can we learn from Charlie Sheen? We can learn a lot from him if we apply the lessons to our own life and if we use those lessons to ask ourselves some important questions. We need to ask ourselves, "What do I want?"

Ask yourself what you truly desire. What are you able to give in a relationship? How much are you able to give?

How important is it that you have children? Do you want children because you decided you really want to have them, or because it's what someone else wants? Do you want children just because your parents weren't very good to you and you want to fix issues from your own childhood? Children are an every day project and an every day responsibility.

So let's really look at the life of Charlie Sheen. Let's take a look at the man who lashed out at his woman on Christmas Day.

Did she drive him crazy, or was he really lashing out at himself? Was he really looking deep inside of himself and felt frustrated realizing that he probably can't give her what she wants?

As we watch the lives of these celebrities, let's also look deep inside our own life. Let's get a grip of our own lives, and stop worrying about other people's lives -- especially people we do not know personally and only know through television and gossip magazines.

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