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Anthony Weiner Is Destroying My Relationship!

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HUMA AND TONY
AP

And it's not just him, it's also Arnold Schwarzenegger, Christopher Lee, John Ensign and all the other politicians involved in recent sex scandals.

Day after day we are bombarded with news stories about the cheat-a-thon by politicians -- apparently, if you want to meet women, get elected to office, it's better than eHarmony.

I have a message for all these guys: Your cheating is not just hurting your family, your careers and your country, it's hurting me. How? Because you're making it impossible for me to convince my girlfriend that all men aren't cheaters.

And I'm not the only man who feels this, as evidenced by a recent poll of New Yorkers which found that more men wanted Rep. Anthony Weiner to resign than women. Why?! Because you are making all men look bad!

It's tough enough maintaining a good relationship without having the worst example of men constantly plastered across the news.

For example, where I live in New York, our former Governor David Paterson was legally blind and even he cheated on his wife. A blind man cheating on his wife truly destroys confidence in men as a whole -- this guy was seeing other women when he literally could not even see them.

Out in California, Arnold Schwarzenegger -- who I refer to as "The Impregnator" -- fathered a child with a member of his house cleaning staff.

Rep. Christopher Lee, who is married, took shirtless photos of himself in the mirror where you could clearly see his face and then posted the photos on Craigslist looking for dates. If there was a "Darwin Award" for dumbest cheater, he would get it. Not only is this guy making men look bad with his cheating, but he's also making us look like idiots, as well.

And the list goes on and on: Senator John Edwards, Governor Mark Sanford, Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, etc., etc...

You know, maybe we are being too tough on these guys, maybe it's somehow our fault -- maybe we are attracted to the "bad boy"? The guy we know deep down we shouldn't like -- the guy we know is likely going to cheat, but for some reason we still elect him and in turn are empowering him to commit his transgressions. Perhaps we are partly to blame?

Is this argument convincing any women out there reading this? Probably not, it fell flat with my girlfriend too, but I figured I'd give it a shot.

Look, if you are politician and you are considering cheating, before you actually commit the act, think of me. (Not literally right before you cheat, but in the decision-making process.) Indeed, think of all the other guys in the brotherhood of men who will suffer a backlash because of your sins.

If that doesn't work, then I propose we do something to stop these men who can't -- or won't -- exercise more self-control. We should revise the oath of office to make it clear that this type of conduct is no longer acceptable.

So, here is the new oath I propose that all men must take when being sworn in: "I promise to defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; I will faithfully discharge my duties and I will stay faithful to my wife, I will only send women photos of myself where I'm dressed in suit, tie and pants, I promise not to add on Facebook as friends or follow on Twitter attractive women in their 20s unless we are related, and I will actually focus on doing my job and not the hot intern who just got hired in my office. So help me God."

So, politicians of the world I say this to you: Before you cheat, think of your country, think of your family, think of your career,and think of me. Because your cheating is killing my relationship!