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Denise Albert Headshot

Stop Judging Other Moms

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I hated being pregnant. I didn't even try breastfeeding. I have struggled internally about how I feel about the fact that my kids climb into my bed at night. But after spending some time with Mayim Bialik at an event we hosted for bloggers to discuss her latest book, "Beyond The Sling", I have a whole new way of thinking.

If you've turned on the television in the past week you have probably seen Mayim discussing Attachment Parenting, the method by which she parents her children. You've heard that she co-sleeps, home-schools and breastfeeds until her kids are ready to stop.

We couldn't be more different. And truthfully, I was hesitant about hosting events for her. I was worried that my way would be judged. I was worried we would have nothing to talk about. She talks about breastfeeding and the Lansinoh bags she uses to store her milk. I wonder if it's OK to say I love their wipes. (I did!)

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What a difference a few days make. After seeing her three days in a row, she confessed to me, and wrote on her blog, "TheMoms.com moderated my Barnes and Noble talk and also hosted a 30 person blogger conference yesterday at my publisher's office. When I originally heard about them, I was worried they were anti-attachment parenting people out to get me ... We have had some really neat conversations on and off camera and I am so impressed by what three women with different parenting philosophies and open minds can accomplish. We have broken down a lot of the judgmentalness [sic] and cattiness women are expected to have in discussing controversial differences in parenting, and it's been a real enlightening experience for us all."

That's an understatement. I left each conversation with Mayim wanting to learn more. There's something really appealing about what she says and how she says it all. She is intelligent and inspirational. She makes it seem so easy. She makes life seem perfect, although she is the first to admit she's not and neither are her kids.

Her kids have tantrums, just like ours. They want the same kids my kids want. My kids may come across as needy and spoiled when asking for things. Her similar experiences with her kids, although they are being raised so differently from mine, make all of the hard times we experience seem so much easier.

But the best part about Mayim is how she delivers what she has researched, learned and practices -- it's all done in a non-judgmental way. And that's the part that was most appealing.

She makes me want to do better. She makes me want to try new ways to discipline. She made me realize that I don't mind if my kids climb into my bed. So instead of struggling with it, I'm going to embrace it. But I still wouldn't breast feed. No judgment here, it's just not for me.

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