America Can Not Afford Another American President

Yesterday OffTheBus spoke with William K. Wolfrum, an American sports writer (BadGolfer.com) and humorist currently living in Uberlandia, Minas Gerais, Brazil. The country's infamous, unequal distribution of wealth is something that can catch an American off guard. On the other hand, Brazil proudly shrunk its income gap by six percentage points since 2001, more than any other country in South America. New oil discoveries will likely thrust Brazil into the ranks of the global petro-powers within the next decade.

Wolfrum's far-flung writing career began in Alaska, where he won a number of Alaska Press Club awards for his columns. Wolfrum urged OffTheBus to mention these Alaskan credentials as a way to get Republicans to show him the love and respect he deserves, since Sarah Palin's experience in Alaska makes her worthy of being president.

Why are you insisting America can't afford to elect another American as president?

William K. Wolfrum: It is my opinion that at this point in history, having an actual American win the U.S. presidency would be national suicide. Americans have become increasingly incompetent as leaders, extending to the apex of incompetence -- George W. Bush. While perhaps a Barack Obama or a John McCain presidency would give the appearance of improvement, in the end I'm afraid their innate Americanism might lead them to make foolish decisions.

Why do you think Americans have become such inept global leaders?

Americans are hamstrung by three factors. First is their inability to refer to the U.S. as anything
other than "The Greatest Country in the World." Second is their firm belief that diplomacy can only be conducted with cruise missiles and tanks. Third is their complete ignorance of world history.

Was this always the case?

Great Americans such as George Washington, John Adams, and Thomas Jefferson helped create a nation that was a grand experiment of democracy and freedom. But they weren't Americans, per se. They were "British Americans." Martin Van Buren was the first bona fide American and what is he known for? The Panic of 1837 and the creation of political parties in the U.S., neither of which did anybody any good, whatsoever.

You're kinda critical, for a natural-born American...

This is by no means a defamation. Americans have been innovative, generous, and helpful. The original Star Wars movies -- which brought joy to billions worldwide -- were made by Americans and starred Americans, with the exception of the guy who played C3PO and many key members of the evil Galactic Empire.

But politics is not film making. And Americans have increasingly proved inept at running their own country, which has led to a stagnating economy, horribly run wars on multiple fronts, a pro-torture mentality, a failing infrastructure, a dollar that's not even worth a dollar, oil prices that appear to be heading toward four figures rather than back to two, and an onslaught of Adam Sandler and Will Ferrell movies.

What do you recommend?

One thing is abundantly clear -- the last thing the U.S. needs is another American in the White House. Now don't get me wrong, I'm fully aware that the Constitution makes it clear that only a natural-born citizen is allowed to be president. But as many have said in recent years, the Constitution is not a suicide pact. It's time to get rid of the Naturalization Rule once and for all.

Does this election have any other big issues?

The economy is an important one. Exactly how many Republican administrations do Americans need before they realize they're all the same? Grandiose deficits. Financial compensation to buddies. Attempts to privatize everything except their own colossal business failures.

Republicans also love to use fallacious "slippery-slope" arguments, like if we allow two women to marry each other, next week I'll marry my dog. But in reality, Americans have slipped towards a type of society that's truly frightening. And both Republicans and Democrats have allowed it to happen. The U.S. needs more than change, it's literally dying for some basic critical thinking skills.

How do you feel about a female vice-president?

For me, Palin's gender comes into play only because of McCain's eagerness to exploit it. I don't respect Palin the idealogue, but I say with complete honesty that I hope she can deal with the sexist behavior coming at her from all directions. The first female member of the Executive Branch -- whether it's Hillary Clinton, Sarah Palin, or someone else -- will face blatant and veiled sexism on a non-stop basis.

Several other nations have already opened the door for women, as far as power is concerned. No one looks at Germany's Angela Merkel and thinks, "Poor girl, she needs a shoulder rub." Well, okay, apparently some Americans think that way. But having a woman in a leadership role doesn't make a whit of difference to me. It remains to be seen if Americans are ready to deal with it.

Despite your misgivings about electing an American, will you support Obama or McCain?

I support Barack Obama 96.2 percent. The other 3.8 percent is just jealousy over how cool he looked draining that three-pointer in front of the troops. I'm a petty, petty man.

The modern conservative ideology of the Republican Party has failed in every way. However, knowing Americans as I do, I'm afraid McCain might win. Dedicated Republicans and Democrats will vote their party, so the non-partisan group will decide this election. I just don't trust that race won't play a part in how they vote. I aspire to be proven wrong. I think the U.S. would be missing a huge opportunity by bypassing Obama.

Follow Diane Tucker on Twitter: www.twitter.com/dianetucker

Comments

[parrotkisser]

I wish they would stop with the "God Bless America" line. It's like they are saying screw the rest of the world. By the way, aren't Palin and ilk supposed to put God before all else, as in "Country First"?

[rjmiller]

I think we all know that if we amend the Constitution to allow naturalized citizens to become president, Schwarzenegger will be elected.

Demolition Man is not only a movie, it is a prophecy.

[lwcassidy]

yes yes, er, I mean no , no.... no American President... What about a Canadian President, eh? I mean we could be one nation, under Canada with Liberty and Justice for moose and all things wild. Do we even know what the leaders of the Canadian Provinces are called, Governors? Lordships? Prime Minister-ettes. This would work out ever so well. No more American self-importance, self-congr­atulations­, or just self. We could be the New Canada.... clean, concerned, isolated yet cool and cold. While we are at it though, what, after all, is so American about American anyway. I mean Florida certainly doesn't abide or seemingly doesn't even know of voting laws... let's dump it. And if we believe Sarah's husband, Mr. First Dude, Alaska doesn't even want to belong to America any more, so let's dump it too. And while we are on a roll, LaLa California has never been in step with the real America, what with AhNold and all things Kennedy. So let's dump it before the Big One does. And just where is Hawaii and can anyone really do the hula? I say dump it. And don't get me started on that tree-loving, environmentally oriented, people friendly blue-stated Oregon... Dump dump dump. I say give America to those red-state, Limbaugh loving, gun-toting folks and let the rest of live the American way.... you remember, the one with the Constitution.

[messy]

the head of the Canadian Green Party, a certain Ms. May, is a natural born American.

[deliriousgod]

I think the point is that you have to stop holding the candidates up against a cardboard cut-out that looks like Yosemite Sam in silhouette with a caption that reads: "You must be this American to be Prez."

[Zoolie]

I've wanted to out-source Bush's job for years.

[nomorebombs]

diebold is scary..

[YouDisgustMe]

all hail william wolfrum!

i agree 1000%.....­constantly referring to ourselves as "the greatest" and ignorance of everything outside of our borders will be our downfall

[deliriousgod]

Humility is a great strength. If you knew more about Russians, you might respect them. They have a great deal in common with Americans. Slower on the draw, but able to absorb more damage than Americans. Hard; not sharp. Rock breaks scissors.

[ICanHasDemocracy]

It is hubris. we are one of the greatest nations, and one of the most arrogant. Look at our talk celebrities. All based on a shadow of insecurity.
Hard- fought Pride has become vanity and hubris.

[YouDisgustMe]

well said

[Mikecroft]

For years, high-tech companies like Microsoft, Intel and Google have been recruiting the best and brightest from overseas, and they haven't done too badly. Maybe it is time to let naturalized American citizens run for the highest office in the land.

[gretchenart]

Great Post. Since we have outsourced everything else, maybe Merkel will step in and help out!

[balkanboy]

Why not Putin? He has had the highest ratings in Russia for a long time!

[CaesarTheDay]

Ever since the end of the cold war, America has lost its global touch. Forget the fact that Americans can't name a foreign country, much less a leader of one; don't travel and don't read the independent news. We don't like to think for ourselves. We want the news media to spoonfeed us. Anything that distracts us from the "America! F#@k Yeah!" stance we've taken is a waste of time.

I'm not sure if a foreign-born person would necessarily change that. McCain is technically foreign born. He was born in the Panama Canal Zone. It's not where you're born. Its where you live. So I'm all for foreign born people running for office (I am one) but these people need to have a proven track record of service and commitment to the country they want to lead.

But I do believe that we need to put term limits on Senators. The Senate and HoR are full of old, loaded, lazy, myopic douchebags who have no interest other than a cushy place to retire in.
The new generation, they X's and the Y's is disenchanted because their grandparents are running the country. Sure you like it when grandpa comes over for Thanksgiving dinner and gives your a shiny quarter to buy candy, but you wouldn't trust him to watch your dog. But we trust them to run our country.

[Dynamohum]

Not everyone in America is as you describe. Some of us are quite worldly and knowledgeable. I'd say about 50% of us. It is the other 50% that you are talking about. The ones that voted for Bush twice.

[Venise Alstergren]

Dynamohum: In my neck of the woods, Australia, Americans are considered to be insanely parochial, flag-waving, naive, unworldly, evangelical, and ignorant of the rest of the world. Australians are statistically the most travelled nation on earth. Hence, you wouldn't hear an Australian asking the questions that several Americans have asked me. "Where's Burma?" (Myanmar) "Do they speak English in Australia?" "I thought Tobago was in Mombassa." "What's the capital of Argentina?" All from fairly well educated Americans, but people who are totally indifferent to the rest of the world. But the worst part of all this is: You want the rest of the world to know all about the US. And you think your standard of living is the best in the world. And so it is for the 10% who live at the very top. Tough for the 70% sleeping in gutters and on park benches. I hope Barack Obama can help to remove this crashing ignorance. And reduce the injustices of the park dwellers.

[hypnotoad72]

He can praise "Star Wars" and bash politicians, but those who made "Star Wars" invariably donated big money to politicians. maybe politicians aren't as much an issue if it's true they're all bought and paid for, right down to the penny?

BTW: "Star Wars" succeeded due to impressive visuals. The storyline is as vapid and clichéd as they come. No wonder it set a standard of good lucks and zilch for the gray matter department...

[thewho77]

The world hates us because we are the leaders of the world, and we are very incompetent. Our incompetence hurts them in many ways.

The people of the United States don't even know what is happening in the rest of the world, and don't have much idea what world history is. We don't even know our own 200 year old history very well. How can we run the world when we don't even know what it is!

[balkanboy]

Bull's eye, my friend! Why do we not see terrorism in Canada or in France? because they do not provoke it. It is that simple!

[deliriousgod]

we've had some minor terrorism in Canada. Some dingleberry burned down a Hindu shrine after Sept. 11. Some young muslim guys were out in the woods playing paint-ball games and talking about cutting the Prime Minister's head off, but the police had an informant in the group who was a Muslim who loved the country that had been so good to his family more than he valued his brotherhood and tribal allegiances.

[randomx6]

Nah, in France all you get are major riots...

[deliriousgod]

It does amaze us that on average, Canadians know more about the US than Americans do. Certainly, some people in the World are hating America, but mostly, it is just self-preservation kicking in. Imagine your drunken uncle trying to bully you into going for a ride on the back of his motorcycle

[DivergentMary]

We can't afford one from that other "we're our own country," Alaska, either.

[mommadona]

I would suggest America cannot afford one more president from that "We're our own country", Texas.
OR any of the "Southern Stratergery" states.

[CatoTheCensor]

You notice we never see Sarah Palin and George W. Bush together? And neither of them can pronounce the word 'nuclear?' Coincidence? I think not. Someone call Oliver Stone; I think I'm on to something, here.

[habajebe]

Be afraid. Be very afraid.