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Donna Labermeier

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What It Takes to Survive Disappointment and Heartbreak

Posted: 06/25/2012 5:30 pm

We've all been there. We feel gutted inside. We feel as if we will never be happy again. Whether someone we love deeply chooses to leave us, a dear friend or family member passes away or something that we've been striving for our entire life doesn't work out, there are a few things we can all keep in mind to help us through these trying times:

1) Learning Healing and Courage

There are certain things in life that no one can teach us. We must experience many situations for ourselves in order to better understand what it means to be human. All of life's challenges are simply opportunities for our souls to grow. Each bump in the road is really just another stepping stone being laid down along our life path, bringing us one step closer to where we need to be. In time, we heal and become stronger and wiser for it. Just remember that peace is everywhere, within every person and situation we encounter, and that the spirit can never truly be wounded and it can certainly never die.

2) Taking Care of Yourself

When we are faced with a situation that seems unbearable, connecting to feelings of disappointment and devastation is unavoidable. The question is how long are we going to stay attached to the heartache and pain -- and can we protect ourselves from becoming emotionally fragmented and get centered again?

The best thing you can do to bring comfort to yourself is this: Before falling asleep at night, think about something in your life or in the world that is good. That's it. Do not fall asleep with negative thoughts in your head, because if you do, you will only program your subconscious mind with more feelings of unhappiness. The result of feeding it negative information just prior to dozing off will ensure we wake up more and more depressed each day. If you can try to see your world as being a little brighter each night before sleep, tomorrow will look a little brighter, and so will the day after that, and the day after that, and so on...

It's okay to look behind you in the rearview mirror from time to time, but believe me, you don't want to live there. Move forward. Soon you will find a way to smile, laugh and have fun again. Just know that changing your focus to happier things will eventually make those unhappy times seem much less difficult.

3) Becoming the Phoenix

In Mythology, the Phoenix was a bird reborn from its own ashes. Like the Phoenix, we can observe in our own lives that disintegration brings with it transformation and rebirth. What was meant for your harm will always be used in your favor. Whatever the circumstance, no matter how horrific it appears, we have to know and trust that it never would have happened unless something very good and very important was going to come from it.

Our universe is loving, caring and supportive, always. So in the case of a breakup with a friend or lover or the loss of a job, remember that if a person or situation is not right for you or is doing harm to you in some way, it will be taken out of your life. Disappointment and heartbreak are always opportunities for someone or something bigger and better to come in for you. Room needs to be made at certain times in your life for that unexpected great person or job to make its presence. One major "upset" will take you from being at the lowest point of your life straight up to the pinnacle of your life if you just open your heart and mind to the limitless possibilities.

When we start seeing those troubling times as blessings in disguise, advantageous and essential to the next chapter of our lives, then we will be much better able to survive and detach from the pain and welcome the future with open arms.

 
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