Back in May, when a run for the 2016 presidential nomination was still a twinkle in Donald Trump's eye, he already had a beautiful but secret plan to "bring ISIS to the table or, beyond that, defeat ISIS very quickly."
When asked by a doting Greta Van Susteren at Fox News, Donald, oh please won't you tell us, the military strategist and wannabe commander in chief coyly replied, "If I run and if I win, I don't want the enemy to know what I'm doing. I don't want the enemy to know what I'm doing. Unfortunately I will probably have to tell at some point, but there is a method of defeating them quickly and effectively and having total victory."
He added:
I don't want to be Obama, where he goes on television to explain exactly when we're going to attack a certain city, what we're going to do, what hour we're going to be using for the attack, how many men are going in. I don't want to do that because, you know, the late great General Douglas MacArthur and General Patton are spinning in their grave when they hear what we do, how we announce exactly what we're going to do and how we are going to do it.
About a week later, in a conversation with Iowa talk radio host Simon Conway, Trump reiterated that he knows of "a way of beating ISIS so easily, so quickly, so effectively, and it would be so nice."
When asked by Conway whether Trump had discussed his plans with any military brass or any people with military experience, Trump claimed that he had run it past two or three people who loved it.
According to Miranda Blue at the Right Wing Watch, Trump described his plan as follows:
So simple. It's like the paper clip...You know, somebody came up with the idea of the paper clip and made a lot of money and everybody's saying, 'Boy, why didn't I think of that, it's so simple.' This is so simple, so surgical, it would be an unbelievable thing. Now, I've been around saying this, you would think somebody from the administration would at least call me and say, 'Hey, could you tell us what it is?' It happens to be a great idea. But at the right time, I guess I'll give it.
And, again, Trump refused to discuss his beautiful, foolproof, secret plan in detail because it would tip off the enemy.
After continuing to tease his base with hints of beautiful but oh-so- secret strategies to defeat ISIL, the Donald finally violated his own "security" principles and spilled the beans in an August 10 MSNBC "Morning Joe" by disclosing the following brilliant strategy:
Let me tell you what I would do. I would, they have great money because they have oil. They have much oil. I would, every place where they have oil, I would knock the hell out of them and I would put boots on the ground in those areas. I would take the oil. What you're doing is you're cutting off a big portion of their money source. The other part of their money source, by the way, happens to be banks. Money is flowing in through banks in Saudi Arabia and other places. You have to cut that off. But, I would knock out the source of their wealth. The primary source of their wealth which is oil. And in order to do that, you would have to put boots- I would knock the hell out of them, but I would put a ring around it and take the oil for our country. I would just take the oil.
But apparently that plan was partly a ruse -- in order not to "tip off the enemy."
On Sunday, in an interview withScott Pelley on "60 Minutes," the Donald announced the real, foolproof plan -- unless it is another brilliant deceptive maneuver to confuse the enemy even more.
When Scott Pelley asks, "We're at war with ISIS as we sit here. How do you end it?" we are witnesses to the following amazing exchange:
Donald Trump: I would end ISIS forcefully. I think ISIS, what they did, was unbelievable what they did with James Foley and with the cutting off of heads of everybody, I mean these people are totally a disaster. Now, let me just say this, ISIS in Syria, Assad in Syria, Assad and ISIS are mortal enemies. We go in to fight ISIS. Why aren't we letting ISIS go and fight Assad and then we pick up the remnants? Why are we doing this? We're fighting ISIS and Assad has to be saying to himself, "They have the nicest or dumbest people that I've ever imagined."
When Scott Pelley suggests "Lay off in Syria, let them destroy Assad. And then we go in behind that?" Donald Trump catches on real quick:"...that's what I would say. Yes, that's what I would say" and finally blurts out his top secret, beautiful plan to defeat ISIL:
"If you look at Syria. Russia wants to get rid of ISIS. We want to get rid of ISIS. Maybe let Russia do it. Let 'em get rid of ISIS. What the hell do we care?"
So simple, so surgical -- just like that paper clip. Boy, why didn't we think of that.
But there is still that little problem of ISIL in Iraq, so Scott Pelley asks, "OK, that's Syria. What do you do in Iraq with ISIS?"
Now it's back to that other beautiful, top secret plan. Donald Trump: "Look with ISIS in Iraq, you gotta knock 'em out. You gotta knock 'em out. You gotta fight 'em. You gotta fight 'em. You have to stand... [with] troops on the ground."
Left unsaid this time, taking their oil, too.
American boots on the ground in Iraq. What a brave, detailed and innovative plan by a fact-free man who, at an expensive prep school, received "more training militarily than a lot of the guys that go into the military" and who, subsequently received draft deferments through much of the Vietnam War.
There you have it, folks. Another great Trump plan that will make your head spin -- until the next plan.