"I dreamed a dream in time gone by
When hope was high and life worth living
I dreamed that love would never die
I dreamed that God would be forgiving"
-Lyrics from "I Dream a Dream" by Andrew Lloyd Webber
Last night, at the Las Vegas airport, a 50-something woman ahead of me at the security checkpoint said to her friend: "I just can't see enough of that Susan Boyle on YouTube! I don't know why, but every time I see her sing in the Brit's American Idol, it really gets to me!" Her companion nods. "Yep, he replies, "Even engineers grab for a Kleenex. I can't help myself, either." Neither male nor female seem to be able to resist.
In case you've not seen this iconic performance on the Web or the news, from Britain's Got Talent, a parallel to American Idol, here it is. Or, should you need another 'feel good' dose, this one's for you.
While much has been said about both Susan Boyle, and the resounding response to her story, I cannot help but offer my own two bits. The fact is that what we've got here is a powerful archetypal story that tugs at the heart of our collective psyche. That's what grabs us on such a deep level. Boyle's performance gives a compelling peek into that universal and ageless theme about the person so unique, that they are shunned and go into exile feeling misunderstood, different, unvalued. More often than not, the creative greats have lived the lives of the rejected, the bullied. Think Buckminster Fuller, Albert Einstein, to name but a few. Misunderstood, ridiculed, made to feel inferior, these and other pioneers, did what few are willing to do: they cleaved to their original, wild nature, and created magnificently in ways that changed the world. Sometimes, they don't make it. Witness the adorable, sweet-natured 11 year old who hung himself with an electrical cord last week after being bullied by classmates because he was 'different,' i.e. he was not afraid to show caring.
People who carry this archetypal theme are compelled to step outside the collective circle which judges them as strange. We see this in the news every day. Take Barack Obama's handshake with Hugo Chavez, or his wife's shared hug with Queen Elizabeth, as examples. Step out of the circle of agreement, and the pig squeals. Those who have sufficient resilience miraculously, like Einstein, Boyle and others, find a way to befriend their own true nature, staying faithful to its imperative for expression, regardless the jeers.
No wonder stories like Hans Christian Anderson's "The Ugly Duckling" have lasted for a few centuries. The tale begins when a swan's egg rolls into the wrong nest. Mother Duck, thinking the egg is hers, attends it, and does her best to shape it to meet her expectations when the hatching reveals a creature that does not 'fit' the standard issue. Many around the world can relate, be their 'Mother Duck' exist in the home or workplace. Regardless how much effort is put into reforming 'unsuitable behavior' and altering 'inappropriate' appearance, resistance persists. Sooner or later, what is truest to our nature must break through into its own expression. The Ugly Duckling becomes the swan. She does this by moving in the direction of her own heart's desire, regardless the obstacles or time it takes.
When we see people like Susan Boyle, like the duckling, we are symbolically viewing our own wildness. A Jungian colleague, Clarissa Pinkola Estes, puts it this way:
"...the wild nature, which, when pressed into circumstances of too little nurture instinctively strives to continue no matter what. The wild nature instinctively holds on and holds out, sometimes with style, other times with little grace, but holds on never the less...For the wildish woman, duration is one of her greatest strengths." - Women Who Run With Wolves
Such a being who endures, is oft misunderstood, and seen as eccentric. In actuality, they are dedicated to the retrieval of their own creative greatness. Yet even greatness needs a positive reflection back to itself. If we, like Susan Boyle, can bring courage to the task of being wholly ourselves, encouraging others as well, if we can muster tenacity to continue, despite snickers guffaws and judgments, then the years of self-exile can turn out to be the necessary incubation ground to bring forth "No song unsung, no wine untasted..."
Do You Make Room For Waddle?
Not, however, before a good deal of growth and self-acceptance. This was brought home to me one Spring when I lived in Thalwil, Switzerland. Many times during those post-doc studies, I'd amble down to Lake Zurich to see how the hatching of ducks, geese, and swans was coming along. One day, I noticed the more advanced fuzzy creatures gathered a few yards from the water. Eventually, one of their waddling members awkwardly made her way to the edge, her girth, on land, in striking disproportion to her sleek neck and head. Yet the moment she launched from the old terrain of terra firma into the lake's new frontier, she became the personification of grace and beauty. She'd found her place in the natural order of things.
Waddling is allowed by Mother Nature.
Certain biped cultures frown on it more than others. Based on results, Britain's Got Talent makes more room for it than in our own American version, where, more often than not, contestants have that air-brushed, perfected 'look' of so many news anchors. Interesting that the U.K. seems to allow more room for the unexpected, and ends up with the likes of Susan Boyle and Paul Potts who've got the goods like Julie Andrews and Pavoratti. Brilliance comes so often with high contrast. It just may be that in our American search for perfection, we are overlooking the gems hidden in the disregarded and overlooked. Let us join together with clear intention to recognize the naturally stunning beauty young or old 'ugly ducklings' we meet, even when it's ourselves in the mirror. Imagine what our world would be if we made room for more of the beautiful, even when it comes in unusual packaging. We'd all be the better for their song.
Feast on the following to see what might happen in our young who are not afraid to stay true to their dream, despite the bullies who do their best to silence the music.
I've missed you, and look forward to hearing your comments, responses, and own heart's desire these days. I'll do my best to get back to you, and your friends/links personally. Come on by our Facebook group "The Heart Whisperers."
Dr. Cara Barker is a Jungian Analyst, business owner, and author of World Weary Woman: Transforming Her Wound, Voice of the Sacred Feminine, Grieving the Loss of Your Child, and other works. She will appear in Super Seminar II in Los Angeles, and in Super Seminar III in New York City in June.
Follow Dr. Cara Barker on Twitter: www.twitter.com/DrCaraBarker
Here's a clip of today's BGT episode. Can you explain why the producers let this lady through the preliminary auditions to face the judges, the audience, and then British television and the world?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bXydQmOTqP0
So, to answer your question after all the above, I don't know.
Here's what I can tell you. Coming up this next Wednesday, I'm doing my best to bring something onto the article that I hope you will find truly enjoyable and inspiring. I ran into something amazing yesterday, so let's see what I can do to share it with you. Hopefully, your computer will bring it up at regular speed. But even if it doesn't, I think you will find what I've got for you well worth the watch. Have a beautiful evening and Sunday.
Blessings,
Cara
Cara
Thank you for coming by, and illustrating with such a poignant story.
May you be surrounded by people as open and supportive as you!
Cara
This is my wish for you, as well. Imagine the treasures awaiting you!
Peace and joy,
Cara
So, you go, Susan! Way to stick it to 'em!
And, don't let anyone "make you over"!
The real question is who are we beneath our routine self? Stay tuned for next Wednesday. I just got permission to use something that should make you really, really happy. Let me know your response next week!
Have a blessed day,
Cara
I just found this and what a home run!
Beautiful.
Your gift of reminding us of the archtetypes in our lives is clearly right on. You put into words what so many couldn't about why Susan Boyle touched us so.
I had not seen the clip of the young boy with the voice of an angel. Wow. another beautiful piece to see the pain on his face of being bullied and the magnificent sounds coming from nowhere.
Thank you!
I will send this on to everyone!
Kari
Just tonight, I came across the most remarkable experience of this in a way that you would love. Watch next week's column. I will share with you and yours an unspeakably moving treasure.
Love,
Cara
Would that you were my own personal counselor.
Blessings upon you!
HopeR: I agree. Maybe we could talk her into group therapy.
Sigh...
Usedtobequiet
Best to you this Thursday,
Cara
The subject is one very close to my heart. Little do you know that you are fanning the flames of something brewing in my heart to create. Double blessings your way.
Feel free to send this link out to your circle of people. We are all in this puppy together.
You might want to consider joining our Facebook group "The Heart Whisperers." The more, the merrier.
Be of good cheer,
Cara
Slowly another little ball appeared, this one noticeably smaller. Down the ramp it slid. Then in a somewhat awkward manner, the little pup began hobbling toward the others, doing its best to catch up....
'I want that one,' the little boy said, pointing to the runt.
The farmer knelt down at the boy's side and said, 'Son, you don't want that puppy. He will never be able to run and play with you like these other dogs would.'
With that the little boy stepped back from the fence, reached down, and began rolling up one leg of his trousers.
In doing so, he revealed a steel brace running down both sides of his leg attaching itself to a specially made shoe.
Looking back up at the farmer, he said, 'You see sir, I don't run too well myself, and he will need someone who understands.'
With tears in his eyes, the farmer reached down and picked up the little pup.. Holding it carefully he handed it to the little boy.
'How much?' asked the little boy. 'No charge,' answered the farmer, 'There's no charge for love.'
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This is a story about understanding and compassion. Susan Boyle's emergence on the stage gets her being understood. And we feel touched, because of our compassion.
Just yesterday I sat in our independent car mechanic's shop and witnessed him quietly allow a handicapped customer to "pay a little each month" for expensive repairs to keep a car running that had to be every bit of 20 years old. During the deadly hurricanes of 2005, this mechanic and his wife feverishly worked around the clock ---literally---for two weeks as part of the groundswell of local volunteer effort to throw a lifeline to our then-drowning and desperate sister city of New Orleans. In a few weeks, these same people are spearheading a local major fund-raising event to benefit pancreatic cancer research.
These are just some of the mostly unseen and unsung acts of love and courage my fellow Louisianians display on a daily basis.
When popular culture stops deciding people who show love, compassion, and integrity (especially when no one is looking) are "chumps" , and starts holding them up as role models, we will be getting somewhere!
Many, many, many congrats to you for what you have achieved. I am absolutely thrilled for you. Look at what you have accomplished! Despite the self-doubts, you have stood steady in the truth of your gift. More than a decade down the age road from you, I can appreciate the inner strength this must have taken, for as women, our tendency is to compare ourselves not only to others, but to the we that we used to be, and are no longer. I think of this every single morning at the gym: there is a grieving to it, isn't there?
Your Light must be very strong. Please stay in touch. I want to hear all about your journey. Your words are not only a source of encouragement for me, but, I know, many, many others. Stories like Susan Boyle's create a beautiful ripple effect. Join us on Facebook, won't you?
Many blessings your way, Maria,
Cara
Thank you, thank you for your words! You are so right about comparing myself even to my past selves (why couldn't I have auditioned during one of my thin periods? Why didn't all this happen when I was younger?). Yes, there is grieving to be done.
But I also believe every single thing in my life has led me to be who I am now, and everything hereafter will be richer for that.
I'd love to join you on Facebook. I'm already on there myself. How do I join your group?
You are a great blessing!
Maria
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Kindness is the language the blind can see and the deaf can hear.
A farmer had some puppies he needed to sell. He painted a sign advertising the 4 pups and set about nailing it to a post on the edge of his yard. As he was driving the last nail into the post, he felt a tug on his overalls. He looked down into the eyes of little boy
'Mister,' he said, 'I want to buy one of your puppies.'
'Well,' said the farmer, as he rubbed the sweat off the back of his neck, 'These puppies come from fine parents and cost a good deal of money..'
The boy dropped his head for a moment. Then reaching deep into his pocket, he pulled out a handful of change and held it up to the farmer.
'I've got thirty-nine cents. Is that enough to take a look?'
'Sure,' said the farmer. And with that he let out a whistle..
'Here, Dolly!' he called.
Out from th doghouse and down the ramp ran Dolly followed by four little balls of fur.
The little boy pressed his face against the chain link fence. His eyes danced with delight. As the dogs made their way to the fence,
the little boy noticed something else stirring inside the doghouse
Cara
We all look for a heaven on earth. Having been in the entertainment business, I know Susan Boyle has become a Legend. She will have great years of 3 to 5 to enjoy if the record company does her right.
However, I must applaud for the creation team of the Britain's Got Talent. The reason they want to have the show is that they truly believe there's a stage for true talent not recognized because of not having the right package. That, is providing "heaven" on earth for talents like Paul Potts and Susan.
Enjoy the reading of your input and I miss you dearly.
Love from Jesse, Taipei, Taiwan
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And, thank heaven for those pockets of people who understand that talent comes in endless forms, and deserves a hearing, a witnessing, a chance.
Please give my love to all in our Taiwan family!
Love and Light,
Cara
Forgiveness, please!
All best wishes,
Cara
Excellent blog! I love when my heartstrings are touched as they were reading your article and viewing the videos. They brought me back to the innocence and purity of childhood when my favorite story as a child was the "Churkenduse" (anybody else heard of this one?). Another was a series about Bertie ("Bertie Comes Through", "Bertie Trys Again"...). And of course, Rudolph the Red Nosed Raindeer and the Ugly Duckling. Something essential in me recognized what The Little Prince said is true, "All that is real is seen with the heart." I love knowing that the childhood knowing and recognition of truth is alive and well in me. I know that through the tears and joy that shows up when the "good guy" wins in the end. Maybe it's true that "except as you are a child you will not enter the kingdom of heaven." : )
Thanks for taking the time to come by, and enrich what's here.
Love,
Cara
Deb is English and we have spent much tim in England- we have seen the origin of all these competitions
POP IDOL was the first
I cried each time I saw and listened to Susan Boyle- she represents each of us
this is the Ultimate dream and we all can live ours through her.
Thank you- now I will meditate on my dream.
Ed
Gratitude, as always,
Cara
Cara
So nice to hear from you after a week off. I hope it was what you wanted it to be.
I have to agree with BartLA when he spoke about judging. How many times have we dismissed a person for whatever reason we might feel is valid? - they look wrong, or dress wrong, or they're old, or believe something we don't believe - the list goes on and if we're not careful and aware, we can spend all of our days cut off from the wonder of the creative person that is right in front of us. And that includes ourselves. Maybe Susan Boyle helped us to WAKE UP and come to an awareness that can soften and connect us. Maybe.
Usedtobequiet
So, good to hear from you again. I hope all is well with you and yours (you know what I mean). I am with you, this is a time for our heart awakening. Yours helps mine!
Love,
Cara